The Allusionist

It's the annual parade of Bonus Bits! Every year, the show's guests say too many interesting things and/or stuff that isn't languagey enough, so I save it up and release it in a delightful melange of facts and thoughts, about language and also not about language. That melange is today, and it includes dinosaur mouths and dinosaur poop, psychedelic plants, feminist cookbooks, and taking a class in profanity.You hear, in order of appearance: Alex Ketchum, Martin Austwick, So Mayer, Hannah McGregor, Kelly Elizabeth Wright and Nicole Holliday.Content note: there are category A swears in this episode.Visit theallusionist.org/bonus2025 for a transcript of the episode and more information about all the people who appear in it, plus links to the previous Allusionists they were in.(And yes I know 2025 is over, but I had to delay this for a month while enjoying a nasty bout of laryngitis, AKA Podcaster's Plague.)Sign up at patreon.com/allusionist for a free account to get occasional emails about Allusionist events and

Today, we read the novelisation of The Muppet Christmas Carol, also known as the 1843 festive lit hit A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. Read by me, Helen Zaltzman; music, sound effects and additional vocals are by Martin Austwick of palebirdmusic.com.Content warning: 200-year-old attitudes towards disability. Also warning for GHOSTS.Scroll way down your podfeed or go to theallusionist.org/dickens-christmas to listen to the episode called How The Dickens Stole Christmas, which is about just why this book has such a big influence on festivities even nearly two centuries later. And it features podcasting luminaries Greg Jenner, Katie Mingle and Avery Trufelman.There are also several other festive episodes of the show, including ones about why Santa St Nick Father Christmas Kringle Klaas has so many names, Christmas song lyrics where the letters sent to Santa go, and a portmanteau word that kicked off a lot of War On Christmas. They're all gathered at theallusionist.org/festivelusionist.Support the show at th

"I have never felt so naked. That's how exposed I felt at the idea that my handwriting was going to be seen by the world," says Tim Brookes, founder of the Endangered Alphabets Project and author of the new book about handwriting By Hand: Can the Art of Writing Be Saved? Writing the book (yes, by hand!) celebrates the act of handwriting, even overcoming the shame arising from his own.Visit theallusionist.org/scribe for more information about Tim's work and today's topics, plus a transcript of the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get to list your creative works in this year's Allusioverse Gift Guide, plus behind-the-scenes info about every episode; livestreams with me reading from my ever-growing collection of dictionaries; and the charming and nurturing Allusioverse Discord community, where among daily sharing of thoughts and amusements, we're watching The Princess Bride, the current season of Great Canadian Baking Show, and

“The more we look into social structures, the more many of us realize we don't fit into them," says So Mayer, author of the new book Bad Language, "So each phrase or set of vocabulary is another piece of that dismantlement.” We discuss finding vocabulary for oneself, coming out as a speech act, growing up under Section 28, busting through oppression and shame, and joyous listening.Content note: in the episode we refer to sexual abuse or crimes against consent, and to suicide, but we do not go into any detail about these things, or describe any experiences. Also there are some category A and B swears.Visit theallusionist.org/disobedience for more information about So's work and today's topics, plus a transcript of the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes info about every episode; livestreams with me reading from my ever-growing collection of dictionaries, and the charming and nurturing Allusioverse Discord co

A change of scene for one episode: recently the brilliant poet and performer Molly Naylor interviewed me for her podcast Making Trouble, about creativity, and she kindly let me run a version of that episode here for you. We're talking about ideas, but also long-term creative careers, mortality, podcasting, external validation, and Molly offers some great prompts for either sparking ideas or making a dinner conversation a bit more lively. Find her work at mollynaylor.com, and listen to Making Trouble in the very place you listen to podcasts.Content note: this episode contains category A and B swears.Visit theallusionist.org/trouble for more information plus a transcript of the episode. And hit the Contact tab to send me a request for an etymological explanation, or a word problem you're having, or observations sparked by previous Allusionists.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes info about every episode; livestreams

It's Banned Books Week. Honorary youth chair Iris Mogul and Sam Helmick, president of the American Library Association, talk about what it is, why it matters so much, and how you can get involved.Visit theallusionist.org/bannedbooks for more information and many links about today's topics, plus a transcript of the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes info about every episode; livestreams with me, Martin and my ever-growing collection of dictionaries, and the charming and nurturing Allusioverse Discord community, where we're watching the current season Great British Bake Off - donors also get a weekly work of flanfic about the show.This episode was produced by me, Helen Zaltzman. Thanks to Thanks to Charisse Barnachea, and to Liv for the Judy Blume books circa 1989. Martin Austwick sings and composed the music. Download his own songs at palebirdmusic.com and on Bandcamp, and listen to his podcasts Song B

In their heyday of the 1970s and 1980s, there were more than 200 - possibly more than 400 - feminist restaurants and coffee shops in the USA and Canada. These places were aiming to change ways of working, and upend the hierarchies of restaurants; to provide food that was ethically sourced and affordable to customers, while providing staff with a decent wage; to signal to particular kinds of people that a space was specifically for them. They didn't always succeed, and often they didn't last for more than a couple of years. But they sure did try things. Dr Alex Ketchum, author of Ingredients for Revolution, a History of American Feminist Restaurants, Cafes, and Coffeehouses, explains the ups and downs of how these places used words.Visit theallusionist.org/breadroses for more information about today's topics, plus a transcript of the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes info about every episode; livestre

Watching the film Legally Blonde one day with the subtitles on, numerous perfectly innocuous words were partially asterisked out, because of a technological problem I can't name here lest this episode be blocked from your podfeed, thus becoming an example of the problem itself.Who's to blame? A 900-year-old man from Lincolnshire. Although he didn't ask for this either.Content note: this episode contains SWEARS. Educational though!Visit theallusionist.org/terisk for more information about today's topics, plus a transcript of the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes info about every episode; livestreams with me, Martin and my ever-growing collection of dictionaries, and the charming and nurturing Allusioverse Discord community, where we're watching the current seasons of Great British Sewing Bee and Great British Bake Off, and our previous watchalong of Legally Blonde begat this episode.This episode was produc

Listener Erica commented: "Perhaps an idea for a bonus ep of Four Letter Word season would be one on two-letter words: there’s an established list that Scrabble nerds end up memorizing, and it’s full of weirdness." In fact, there are TWO established lists, NASPA, the North American Scrabble Players Association, which has currently 107 two-letter words, and Collins Scrabble Words, formerly known as SOWPODS, used by the rest of the world and contains at present 127 two-letter words.And this episode, we're going to hear all those two-letter words. If you don't agree with their Scrabbular validity, don't blame me! Some of the inclusions were a surprise!Visit theallusionist.org/two for more information about today's two-letter words, plus a transcript of the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes info about every episode, livestreams where I read from my ever-growing collection of dictionaries, and the charming and

For today’s instalment of Four Letter Word season, we’re hopping from ‘bane’ to ‘bain’ to ‘bath’, via poison gardens, doll’s eyes, alchemists, placentas and waterborne curses.Visit theallusionist.org/bane for more information about today's topics, plus a transcript of the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes info about every episode, livestreams with me, Martin and my ever-growing collection of dictionaries, and the charming and nurturing Allusioverse Discord community, where we're watching the current seasons of Great British Sewing Bee.This episode was produced by me, Helen Zaltzman, on the unceded ancestral and traditional territory of xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam), Sḵwx̱wú7mesh (Squamish), and səlilwətaɬ (Tsleil-Waututh) Nations. Martin Austwick appears and also composed the music, including his new song 'Poison Garden'. Download his songs at palebirdmusic.com and on Bandcamp, and listen to his podca

The latest four letter word of Four Letter Word season is dino. 'Dinosaur' is derived from Greek 'terrible lizard', and they could have called it 'whopping great lizard' or 'sublime lizard' or 'hey cool lizard', but no. TERRIBLE. Professor Hannah McGregor of Material Girls podcast and author of the book Clever Girl: Jurassic Park explains humans' relationship with language for dinosaurs, and why 'terrible' might be a perfect choice.Visit theallusionist.org/dino for more information about dinos, links to Hannah and her work, pics of the Crystal Palace Park dinosaurs, and the transcript of the episode.TOMORROW, ie 22 July, at 4pm UK time, BBC Radio 4 is broadcasting (and internetting) our piece Souvenirs, a sort of tragicomic essay/documentary/musical? about the two friends who around 1900 founded the groundbreaking Doves Press then almost immediately had a big falling out and spent more than a decade fighting over their in-house typeface. And THEN things got weird. If you like stories about history and/or pett

Get in, winner: we're going on a field trip. We're spending the day in five of Vancouver's city parks with Justin McElroy, Municipal Affairs Reporter for the CBC and ranker of Vancouver's 243 parks at VancouverParkGuide.ca. Together we ponder: what IS a park? You think you know, then along comes a slab of concrete called a park to test your taxonomy.Visit theallusionist.org/park for photos of the parks and more information about them, plus a transcript of the episode.Events are happening! Get info at theallusionist.org/events about the meetup on 13 August in one of Vancouver's beach parks, the listening party for the live Radio 4 broadcast of our piece Souvenirs, and for Four Letter Word season, a watchalong of the films Dick and Dicks: The Musical. Want to join that? Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes glimpses about every episode, livestreams with me and my collection of dictionaries, and the charming and support

The other day was the 53rd anniversary of the break-in at the Watergate Hotel, which not only caused a lot of political uproar, it had a big linguistic legacy: the suffix -gate to mean a scandal. Today, as part of Four Letter Word season, we have a list of -gates - royal, sporting, political, food, showbiz - it's a non-exhaustive list because there are so many, and new ones are being spawned all the time. Content warning for all sorts of bad human behaviour.At theallusionist.org/gate you'll find a transcript of this episode, plus links to more information about many of the -gates, and to the rest of Four Letter Word season.Also check theallusionist.org/events for upcoming live shows, including a special collab with Material Girls podcast, and an event with Samin Nosrat for her new book Good Things.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes glimpses about every episode, livestreams with me and my collection of dictionaries

Four Letter Word season continues with a quiz (which is a four-letter word itself) about four letter words. Test your etymological knowledge, and hear about the original nepo baby, John Venn's invention that wasn't the venn diagram, brat, gunk, rube, the time(s) Led Zeppelin changed their name, and plenty more.Play along while you listen - there's an interactive scoresheet at theallusionist.org/444, where there's also a transcript of this episode, plus links to more information about topics therein, and to the rest of Four Letter Word season and the previous Allusionist quizzes. Also check theallusionist.org/events for upcoming live shows, including a special collab with Material Girls podcast, and an event with Samin Nosrat for her new book Good Things.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes glimpses about every episode, livestreams with me and my collection of dictionaries, and the charming and supportive Allusiovers

Ten years ago, on the fourth episode of the show, I investigated why the C-word is considered a worse swear than the others. Since then - well really just in the last three years or so - there has been a huge development: the word has hit the mainstream as a compliment, in the forms of serving it and -y. Linguists Nicole Holliday and Kelly Elizabeth Wright discuss this use of the word originating in the ballroom culture of New York City in the 1990s, and what it means to turn such a strong swear into praise.Related to this: the Allusionist live show Souvenirs! Which is about, among other things, some of the tech problems today's word causes, and how being one can wreck a friendship and a printing press. See Souvenirs in Toronto 1 June and Montréal 9 June; find ticket links and venue info at theallusionist.org/events.Visit theallusionist.org/serving for a transcript of this episode, plus links to more information about topics in the episode, and the rest of Four Letter Word season.Support the show at theallusi

Welcome to Four Letter Word season!We're kicking off with one of the most versatile words: it can be a noun, verb, punctuation, expostulation, full sentence on its own; it can be an intensifier, an insult and a compliment... and a Category A swear, which is why I've had to sanitise it for the title lest your pod app takes exception. And of course, content note: this episode contains many category A swears, plus some sexual references.Lexicographer and editor Jesse Sheidlower joins to talk about making four editions (so far) of The F Word, a history and dictionary of the multivalent F word. Find his work at jessesword.comNext up in Four Letter Word season: we revisit an even stronger swear.Visit theallusionist.org/ffff (that's four Fs) for a transcript of this episode, plus links to more information about topics in the episode.Support the show at theallusionist.org/donate and as well as keeping this independent podcast going, you also get behind-the-scenes glimpses about every episode, fortnightly livestreams

Happy tenth birthday to this show! To celebrate, here's every randomly selected word from the dictionary from the first decade of the show.  Visit theallusionist.org/randomlyselectedwords to read the transcript and get other Tranquillusionist episodes. The podcast is taking a break until early May 2025, but the Allusioverse will continue to be in full swing: become a member at theallusionist.org/donate. You get regular livestreams with me reading from my ever-expanding collection of dictionaries, inside scoops into the making of this show, and watchalong parties - such as Great Pottery Throwdown (2025), and Cold Comfort Farm (1995). And best of all, you get the company of your fellow Allusionauts in our delightful Discord community.  There's also a free livestream for everyone happening 18 January 1pm PT/4pm ET/21:00 UTC at youtube.com/allusionistshow. This episode was produced by me, Helen Zaltzman, with music composed by Martin Austwick of palebirdmusic.com. Find @allusionistshow on Instagram, Facebook, You

It's the annual parade of Bonus Bits - things this year's guests said that I couldn't fit into their episodes, and/or weren't about language, but now is their time to shine. We've got tricorn hats, changing your dog's name, Boston cream pie, parmesan vs vomit, the placebo effect's negative sibling, the universal blank, headache poetry and bawdy riddles. And more! Thanks to, in order of appearance: Joanna Kopaczyk, Juliana Pache, Ben Zimmer, Stacey Mei Yan Fong, A.J. Jacobs, Zazie Todd and Caroline Crampton. Visit theallusionist.org/bonus2024 for the transcript of this episode, more information about the topics therein, links to all the guest and their original episodes, and all the previous years' bonus episodes. Content note: this episode contains mentions of cancer and death, and anti-fat culture - but I tell you when that section is about to start, so you can skip ahead by five and a half minutes if you need to. To help fund this independent podcast, take yourself to theallusionist.org/donate and become a

In Lexicat part 1, we met the author Mary Robinette Kowal and her cat Elsie, and learned about how they communicate via a set of buttons programmed with words. In part 2, two talking dogs, Bastian and Parker - and their humans, Joelle Andres and Sascha Crasnow - join us too, and explain how they discovered some very unexpected things about what their animal companions are thinking and feeling thanks to the buttons, and how they changed the ways they communicate with other humans too. And animal behaviour expert Zazie Todd gives us some tips for interpreting cats’ and dogs’ body language. Find out more about the episode and read the transcript at theallusionist.org/lexicat2.  Content note: this episode contains mentions of Parkinson’s disease, dementia, and death - human and animal death. But no descriptions of death. To help fund this independent podcast, take yourself to theallusionist.org/donate and become a member of the Allusioverse. You get regular livestreams with me reading from my ever-expanding colle

Elsie the cat has a set of 120 buttons programmed with words. She uses them to lie, swear, apologise, express grief and frustration and love to her human, the author Mary Robinette Kowal, who talks about what's involved in learning to communicate via language buttons with companion animals. And animal behaviour expert Zazie Todd explains how animals might be interacting with human language.  This is the first half of a two-parter: in the next episode, some talking dogs - and their humans - come to visit, and we hear about the kinds of things you find out about what your animal friend is really thinking, and how it changes the ways you communicate with other humans too. Find out more about the episode and read the transcript at theallusionist.org/lexicat1.  Content note: this episode contains a few category B swears. To help fund this independent podcast, take yourself to theallusionist.org/donate and become a member of the Allusioverse. You get regular livestreams with me reading from my ever-expanding collec