Sex Ed The Musical

Did you know you can lose weight by having sex? What?!? That’s amazing! Two things I love, boning and toning. That has to be true, right? Welllllll…according to the Dr. Felix Sex Workout Calculator, a woman who weighs 140 pounds and has sex in the missionary position FOR AN HOUR, will burn 84.6 calories. To lose one pound of weight, you need to burn 3500 calories. So if a woman wanted to lose one pound of weight, she would need to have continuous missionary position sex for 41 hours. 41 straight hours of boning to lose one pound. I don’t know about you but my vulva would probably break after 41 minutes, forget 41 hours. But we’ve all been told SEX IS A GREAT WAY TO LOSE WEIGHT. Unfortunately that is not exactly true. For years magazines and “news” headlines have fed us non-stop misinformation about sex, and reproduction. And we bought it all. Shoe size dictates dick size. Oysters make you horny. Women don’t like sex. Well, actually heterosexual women are the least sexually satisfied group, but we’re going to