Dialogue On Divorce

"Divorce will get you out of one situation. It will not guarantee, though, a happy ending in the next." - Jessica McCarthy Dr. Jessica McCarthy, a renowned clinical and school psychologist from New Jersey, is celebrated for her expertise in supporting women through life transitions, including divorce. As the founder of Elements Psychological Services, she adopts a no-nonsense approach to simplify complex psychological concepts, making her a respected figure in both clinical and media landscapes. Dr. McCarthy views divorce as an opportunity to start anew rather than an assured path to happiness, urging individuals to engage in self-reflection and learn from past experiences to avoid repeating old patterns. She advocates for intentional living by setting clear boundaries and focusing on self-discovery, empowering her clients to craft a fulfilling and purposeful new chapter in their lives after divorce. Key Takeaways ->Healing after divorce requires time and support to prioritize personal well-being. ->Divorc

"If you don't know about the money, you don't have control over the money or access to the money." Ed Vargo, the founder of Burning River Advisory Group and Enlighten Her, is a fervent advocate for financial literacy, particularly focusing on empowering women. Inspired by his immigrant mother's struggles with financial independence, Ed has dedicated his career to providing compassionate financial guidance to help women achieve equality through financial strength. He emphasizes the significance of teaching financial literacy from a young age, advocating for parents to model positive financial behaviors for their children and encouraging open discussions about money within families. Vargo also highlights the impact of financial misunderstandings on relationships, especially during divorce, underscoring the importance of assembling a knowledgeable support team and fostering financial education to promote harmony and independence. Key Takeaways: ->Ed Vargo emphasizes teaching children about money management fro

"If your parents and you are just going to look at the negative side only and just keep making it worse for yourself, it's never going to get better." -Joseph Zweben- Joseph Zweben, a student at Pace University, is a testament to the positive impact of cooperative parenting during challenging times like divorce. Having personally experienced the benefits of his parents' collaborative efforts, Joseph emphasizes how their open communication and conflict-free environment allowed him and his brother to thrive academically and athletically. This nurturing approach not only bolstered his emotional well-being but also sparked his passion for helping others facing similar challenges, as demonstrated through his volunteer work with organizations such as Top Soccer and Best Buddies. Joseph's story underscores the potential for resilience and growth in children when parents prioritize a supportive and stable environment, even amidst the complexities of divorce. Key Takeaways: ->The positive impact of cooperative pare

"You really want to know what your priorities are and then you want to know what your spouse's priorities are, because they might be different." - Melissa Murphy Pavone Melissa Murphy Pavone is a seasoned certified financial planner and divorce financial analyst, whose 18 years of experience in the field are deeply influenced by her personal experiences as a child of divorce. She founded Mindful Divorce Partners to guide clients through the intricate financial challenges of divorce with clarity and assurance. Melissa stresses the importance of proactive and holistic financial planning, focusing on understanding settlement options, tax implications, and the long-term effects of financial decisions, especially when children are involved. Her approach goes beyond mere numbers, helping clients design balanced and sustainable financial plans that align with their future goals and risk tolerance, while avoiding common pitfalls such as retaining the family home without considering its long-term financial impact.

"In divorce we grieve the marriage, we grieve the life we once had with our partner and what that looked like. We grieve that stability." - Justine Carino Justine Carino, a licensed mental health counselor with over 12 years of experience, is a prominent voice in understanding the psychological impact of divorce. Specializing in anxiety and depression, she highlights the critical role therapy plays in navigating the emotional complexities of this life-altering event. Through her practice and her podcast, "Thoughts from the Couch," Justine emphasizes the importance of therapy in guiding individuals through the stages of grief, helping them rebuild their identities, and fostering personal growth. Her compassionate insights, featured in major media outlets like Cosmopolitan and the Huffington Post, reassure those experiencing divorce that with the right support, happiness and transformation are attainable outcomes. Key Takeaways: ->Divorce can bring about a range of emotional challenges similar to the stages

Why is emotional well-being important in financial planning post-divorce? Jody D'Agostini is a renowned financial strategist and certified divorce financial analyst with nearly two decades of experience, specializing in helping individuals navigate the financial intricacies of divorce at Falcon Financial Group in Morristown. Transitioning from a career as a physician's assistant, Jody has dedicated her practice to empowering clients, particularly women, by educating them on financial literacy and the importance of informed decision-making. Her approach emphasizes personalized, holistic financial planning that considers each client's unique life stressors and priorities, with a focus on setting them up for long-term success rather than short-term gain. Jody advocates for a balanced mindset during divorce, advising clients to meet their needs while minimizing emotional and financial strain, and is committed to fostering financial stability and growth through tools like collaborative law and career re-evaluatio

"Depth psychology is a more spiritual approach, a psychospiritual approach to understanding yourself more deeply." - Deborah Lukovich Dr. Deborah Lukovich is a renowned depth psychologist who offers a unique perspective on navigating the complexities of divorce by delving into the unconscious mind. With a belief that up to 90% of our actions and decisions are influenced by hidden forces, she emphasizes the importance of uncovering these unconscious patterns and behaviors that shape relationships. Through her book "Your Soul is Talking, Are You Listening?" and her engaging podcast and blog, Dr. Lukovich provides valuable insights into the unseen dynamics and hidden agendas that often go unnoticed during the tumultuous process of divorce. By guiding individuals to explore the depths of their psyche, Lukovich aims to foster a deeper understanding of personal and relational dynamics, ultimately aiding clients in transforming their relationship patterns and preventing past experiences from dictating future connec

"Kids have large antenna on their heads that you can't see, but they're always scanning for information, and that is information that is picked up very easily." - Lisa Herrick Dr. Lisa Herrick, a renowned family therapist and collaborative divorce coach, has nearly twenty years of experience guiding families in the Washington, D.C. area through the complex transition period of separation and divorce. She emphasizes that this transition varies greatly among individuals, depending on their resilience and specific circumstances, and underscores the importance of allowing adequate time for adjustment, adaptation, and recovery. Dr. Herrick advocates for honest and respectful communication between co-parents, particularly when introducing new partners to children, to minimize confusion and build trust. Drawing from personal experience, she highlights the intricate dynamics involved in shared family activities post-divorce, such as spending holidays together, and the necessity of preparing new partners for their ro

"The key is that it keeps the children stable. It keeps their routines consistent. There's a lot less upheaval and chaos for the children. It's a very child centered approach to separation and divorce." - Ann Gold Buscho Ann Gold Buscho, a licensed clinical psychologist, is renowned for her expertise in family dynamics surrounding divorce, with a particular emphasis on child-centered solutions. As the author of "The Parents Guide to Bird Nesting: A Child-Centered Solution to Co-Parenting During Separation and Divorce," she advocates for bird nesting as a strategy to mitigate the negative impacts of divorce on children by ensuring stability and consistency in their environment. Buscho underscores the importance of prioritizing children's welfare by setting aside personal conflicts and fostering effective co-parenting through open communication and collaboration. Her work offers practical tools and guidance to help parents navigate the complexities of bird nesting, including addressing financial and logistical

Prenups get a bad rap. And if you broach the subject with a partner, they often think you’re planning for the marriage to fail. But what if a prenuptial agreement could help you get on the same page about money before you got married? What if a prenup could reduce tension in your marriage and even prevent divorce? Aaron Thomas has been named Atlanta's best divorce attorney three times, and he’s one of the nation's top experts in family law issues. Aaron is also the founder of Prenups.com, a platform that helps couples establish a solid financial foundation before they walk down the aisle, and author of The Prenup Prescription: Meet the Premarital Contract Designed to Save Your Marriage. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Aaron joins Katherine to explain how prenups help couples establish a good working relationship around money. Aaron discusses the parallels between business partnerships and marriage, challenging couples to structure their finances in a way that makes both parties feel secure. Li

If you’re considering divorce, it’s useful to do a cost-benefit analysis before you initiate the process. And think beyond the legal fees and division of property. How much time will it take to work through the process? What's the emotional cost to you, your spouse and your children? How might it impact your career? Raiford is CEO and Managing Partner of STG Divorce Law in Chicago and Fellow at the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. Raiford is also the author of the award-winning divorce book, I Just Want This Done: How Smart, Successful People Get Divorced Without Losing Their Kids, Money, and Minds. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Raiford joins Katherine to explain why you should get educated before you jump into a divorce. Raiford describes how to reframe the experience of divorce as an opportunity for growth and discusses how his own divorce changed the way he approaches his work as a divorce lawyer. Listen in for Raiford’s insight on trying alternative dispute resolution in high-confli

Neepa Padia gave up her senior level career in India to get married and immigrate to the US. But her partner was abusive, and Neepa wanted out. Unfortunately, she was in the country on a dependent spouse visa and had no friends, no family and no job. How did Neepa navigate divorce as an immigrant? Neepa is the Certified Divorce Coach behind Holistic Divorce Journey, a platform that helps immigrants in divorce with logical steps and tools toward a brighter future. Neepa’s personal experience has shaped her into a compassionate and nonjudgmental coach, ensuring that her clients are not alone on this journey of getting divorced in a in a strange land. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Neepa joins Katherine to explain how her experiences as an immigrant going through a divorce inspired her to become a divorce coach. Neepa discusses the options available to people in the US on a dependent spouse visa, describing the resources available to immigrants dealing with the emotional and logistical challenges

You might assume that mediators who specialize in prenups recommend them for everyone. But Laurie Israel is actually against prenuptial agreements for most couples. So, when should you consider creating a prenup? And how do you write one in a fair and loving way that strengthens the new marriage? Laurie is a collaborative lawyer and mediator based in Massachusetts, where she concentrates her practice exclusively on prenuptial and postnuptial agreements. Laurie also writes extensively about the art of mediating prenups, and she is the author of The Generous Prenup: How to Support Your Marriage and Avoid the Pitfalls. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Laurie joins Katherine to explain when a prenup is a good idea and when it isn’t, discussing why it’s inappropriate to think of a marriage as a business deal. Laurie shares her thoughts on prenups for inheritances, second marriages, and business owners, describing what to look for in a mediator to negotiate your agreement. Listen in for Laurie’s insig

In the early days of her family law practice, Heather Quick noticed a troubling pattern among the women she represented. Women often undervalued what they brought to the marriage and failed to stand up for themselves in the divorce process. So, what can women do to change their mindset around divorce and fight for what they deserve? Heather Quick is Founder and CEO of Florida Women’s Law Group, the only divorce and family law firm in Northeast Florida that serves women exclusively. Consistent with her message of women's empowerment, Heather has published several books on divorce and business, including Women’s Guide to Divorce in Florida and Women’s Guide to Becoming a Successful Entrepreneur. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Heather joins Katherine to discuss the unique challenges facing women in divorce, from stay-at-home moms to female breadwinners. Heather explains how women compromise on finances to protect their children and why that’s a bad idea, challenging couples to stop using their chil

If you’re going through a divorce, writing a love letter is probably the last thing on your mind. But Jennifer Lee, AWMA, AIF, suggests that sharing your values and hopes for the future in a family love letter to your children is a good first step for financial planning in divorce. So, how does a love letter help you set meaningful financial goals and make better money decisions? Jennifer is the founder of Modern Wealth, a Sarasota-based financial firm with a focus on helping individuals in transition, and author of Squeeze the Juice: Live with Purpose, Then Leave a Legacy. Jennifer brings a fresh perspective on the financial planning process by digging deep to understand her clients’ values and helping them use money as a tool to accomplish their dreams. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Jennifer joins Katherine to share the personal experience that inspired her idea for a family love letter in the financial planning process. Jennifer explains why financial anxiety is such a common issue in the div

Asking your partner for a divorce is challenging under any circumstances. But the conversation can be downright dangerous if you’re leaving an abusive spouse. In fact, upwards of 70% of women who leave an abusive spouse are murdered. So, what resources are available to victims of intimate partner violence? How do you mitigate the risks associated with divorcing an abuser? Beverly Price is the driving force behind Her Empowered Divorce, a coaching practice that has supported thousands of women facing the most challenging aspects of divorce. Beverly is also the visionary behind the Divorce Coalition, a network of divorce professionals and survivor advocates united to transform the landscape of domestic abuse. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Beverly joins Katherine to explore the impact of domestic abuse in divorce and explain why you shouldn’t leave an abuser without a safety plan. Beverly discusses the benefit of having a divorce coach, describing how she offers clients education and preparation

Is your relationship causing you a great deal of stress? Do you suspect that your partner has a diagnosable mental illness? In such a challenging situation, it’s human nature to blame the other person in the relationship. To label their behavior as wrong and ask, ‘Why won’t they change?’ But if their mental health is in question, they may not be able to change. And the better question is, ‘What is YOUR next right step?’ Judy Herman is a mental health professional and relationship wellness advocate dedicated to equipping high-achieving women in the helping professions go from trauma drama into vibrant karma. Judy is also the host of Better Relationships, Better Life: The Podcast and author of Beyond Messy Relationships and Relationships with Purpose. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Judy joins Katherine to explain how her personal experience as a twice-divorced relationship therapist inspired her to write Relationships with Purpose. Judy discusses what differentiates someone with self-centered char

If you aren’t fully informed about your finances in marriage, you can’t negotiate from a level playing field in divorce. That’s why Adrienne Grace is committed to helping women with what she calls holistic financial planning. So, what is holistic financial planning? How can it help you negotiate a realistic divorce settlement and build a plan for the future? Adrienne is the Women’s Wealth Advocate and Holistic Financial Planner behind Transitioning Finances, a platform where she guides women and couples to successfully negotiate divorce settlements, survive financial transitions and rebuild afterward. Adrienne has 30-plus years of experience working in every area of the financial world, and she is passionate about helping you overcome your financial challenges and move empowered into the next phase of your life. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Adrienne joins Katherine to discuss why the inability to communicate about money is often the cause of divorce. Adrienne explains how she helps people under

What do you need to know about filing your taxes during or after divorce? Are asset transfers taxable? What about alimony and child support? Who claims the children? And what if your ex mishandled the finances and there’s tax debt you knew nothing about? Tax Attorney Hubert Johnson is Founder of Guardian Tax Law, where he has assisted thousands of individuals and businesses dealing with IRS and state tax issues. Hubert lectures to tax professionals in seminars and training sessions across the country and has cowritten two books on tax debt resolution. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Hubert joins Katherine to answer your questions around tax issues in divorce, explaining where to go for tax information if your soon-to-be-ex handled the finances. Hubert walks us through the pros and cons of delaying divorce to file taxes jointly and discusses when asset transfers are a taxable event—and when they’re not. Listen in for Hubert’s insight on the tax rules around alimony and child support and learn wh

Julie Rountree began her career as a divorce attorney. And she quickly realized that clients expected her to be both their legal advocate and counselor. But it was very difficult to wear both hats. Julie recognized that her clients needed someone to help them navigate the emotions of divorce. That’s when she stumbled on divorce coaching and thought, ‘This is professional who’s been missing from the divorce litigation team.’ Today, Julie is the Certified Divorce Coach behind Divorce Coaching Solutions, a practice that helps clients navigate the frustration of divorce, grow their confidence, and transition into life beyond divorce. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Julie joins Katherine to discuss her role in helping people work through their emotions, articulate their goals, and manage expectations around divorce. Julie walks us through what a divorce coach does for their clients, describing how she helps people become and remain the best version of themselves through the process. Listen in for