Life Over Coffee With Rick Thomas

Abuse is one of the most common subjects discussed in our culture today. Knowing how to respond when someone abuses another person is vital, something every church and its members must become proficient at doing. In this episode, I walk through ten essentials about abuse. Though this treatment is not exhaustive, these ten things must be on every checklist so we can become more effective soul care providers for the abused and their abusers. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-408-the-ten-point-checklist-when-abuse-happens/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

When children are young, they believe their parents are impressive in about every way. As they grow older and create proper categories for living well with others, they begin to see their parents’ good and bad behaviors. Observing flawed lives in the family dynamic does not have to be harmful to the children if the parents consistently clean up their messes by active repentance. However, suppose the husband and wife are not modeling a practical picture of Christ and His church while repenting along the way. In that case, it can have a detrimental impact on their children, even pushing them away from the family and Christ. Biffy was one of those kids, as you are about to read from the letter he wrote to his dad. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/dear-parents-will-you-stop-your-arguing-please/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://ric

We live in two worlds at the same time, the physical and spiritual. We can see, touch, taste, smell, hear and intimately engage each other in the physical realm. The spiritual world is all around us, too. But differently. We cannot touch, taste, smell, hear or see this world, but it is just as real. Imagine this: it takes all our lives to learn how to live well in the physical world. What about the unseen realm? How difficult it must be to live well with what we cannot see. The temptation would be natural to dismiss the spiritual world, but that would be a mistake. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/spiritual-warfare-some-tips-on-how-to-fight/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – The novelty of social media has turned deadly but many Christians do not know how it's eating away at the soul of the church. It has been so subtle (and fun) that we are amusing ourselves to spiritual death. And we're exporting our cyber behavior to our children as they grow up in a world where gathering worshiping, and spurring one another on to love and good works is for past generations. The process of life in the cyber world happened in four strategic steps. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-407-the-new-and-dangerous-way-christians-build-community/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

The angry heart does not have to direct its frustration toward anyone to complicate that relationship. All the angry person has to do is stand in the vicinity of those who receive the spillover of their anger. Whether you’re mad at someone or intoxicating the room with your frustration, it will damage your redemptive goals with the casualties. Every partner, parent, pastor, and peer must learn to bring sinful anger into submission to Christ, or it will complicate the lives of others. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/when-the-parents-anger-complicates-the-life-of-the-child/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Every child to varying degrees is treated poorly by a parent. I wish I had another story to tell. Victimization is not okay or straightforward, but it is a fact about the fallout of fallenness. If the child does not know how to process the hurt or cast it on Christ, they will probably grow up bitter, as I did. The good news is that even if you find yourself in the snare of bitter victimization, there is a way out. There is help and hope because Christ came to set captives free, which is what He did for me. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/the-reason-i-stopped-hating-my-dad-2/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – One of our long-time supporters posed a question about demonic activity on our forums. He suggested that biblical counselors and Christians generally do not devote adequate time and concern to demonic activity. His concerns and valid, and our supporters may read that thread here. In this episode, I'm addressing some of the problems and how to think through demonic activity practically. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-406-should-christians-place-an-emphasis-on-demonic-activity/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

I have been accused (my word, not theirs) of writing too much about how husbands need to change. Of course, my “accusers” are husbands. They may be right. I do think a lot about husbands for two primary reasons. I am a husband, which motivates me to give more thought to how to be a better one, and men should be servant leaders in their families, so I typically begin with me—how can I change? But those priorities do not negate the truth that some women are mean. So, to all husbands everywhere, let’s talk about those mean wives and the husbands who must work extra hard to love them well. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/mean-wives-and-their-husbands-who-should-love-them-anyway/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Transformation starts in a person’s soul as he relates to God while refusing to make excuses for why things are the way they are. The motivation for change must be a singular desire to glorify God while giving lesser consideration to the things happening in an individual’s life and relationships. If a person focuses more on horizontal complications than God-glorifying, vertical necessities, it will be challenging to bring their soul to a place of authentic, long-term heart change. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/i-knew-i-could-not-stay-angry-and-progress-in-my-marriage/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – The DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition) is the manual that the APA (American Psychiatric Association) uses to identify psychological (soul) problems. In March 2022, the APA published a new DSM-5 Text Revision (DSM-5-TR). It is to the secular community what the Bible is for the Christian community. Dr. Daniel Berger shares his opinions on the DSM and the latest changes. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-405-dr-daniel-berger-discusses-the-new-dsm-5-tr-text-revision/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Two radically different things are knowing God through personal study and experiencing Him in the crucible of suffering. This autobiographical short story briefly walks you through the worst day of my life, the day I met the Lord in the crucible of suffering. Everything changed that day, and it took years to process His fearful work in my life. The good news is that after He completed this phase of my life, I was on the right track for an unimaginable adventure with God. But first, the hard part. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/28th-anniversary-worst-day-life/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

A husband who devalues his wife did not just become this way. There is always a trail that leads to this outcome. Devaluing a spouse is a symptom, not a cause. There are two ways to keep from marrying such a selfish, devaluing man. One, you must recognize the early signs and run before the trail heats up. The second is much harder; you have already married him and are reaping the whirlwind of his selfishness. There is still hope and help for this second situation, though it will come through God’s strength perfected in your weakness. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/the-surprising-truth-of-why-a-husband-devalues-his-wife/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – What do you do when someone data-dumps on you about someone else? You did not ask for it, but the person gossiped about another person—perhaps a friend of yours—and it was unsolicited. These situations are almost always messy, leaving you uncomfortable and challenged to respond humbly and biblically to the gossiper. In most cases, this is not the first time the gossiper gossiped, which ratchets the need to do something about it because gossip is a spiritual cancer that divides friendships and churches. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-404-how-to-respond-when-someone-gossips-to-you/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

New Testament sanctification typically happens in corporate contexts, not in isolation. It is appropriate to say that you can do many things by yourself, but sanctification is not one of those things; it’s not possible to image the Trinity by living apart from the community of faith. The apostle Paul mainly wrote to local churches, teaching those communities how to do mutual, reciprocal life together. One of the vital keys to robust community life is understanding the value and appropriateness of corrective care. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/the-art-and-care-of-correction/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

If you want to change your life, you need a self-help book to guide you through the process. The good news is that there is a perfect book for you. It's called the Bible, the world's most perfect psychology book. Yes, the best psychology book; I will explain that later. There is not a better system of thought than the Bible when it comes to life change. If you're ready for a radical transformation, keep reading. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/perfect-self-help-book-that-will-change-your-life/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – Believing something and knowing something are two different things. Though knowing something is more important than believing something, we connect them because whatever it is we know, it flows into our belief systems. And our beliefs systems will pour into our practices. The formula is knowledge creates beliefs, which form our practices. If our knowledge comes from something outside of God’s Word, it will alter our belief systems and practices, which could be detrimental to any individual and their relationships. https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-403-the-difference-between-believing-and-knowing-something/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Bible knowledge is incredible and a non-negotiable for any serious believer. But knowledge without application is futile, practically speaking. For the Bible to master any of us, we have to do more than read it. Think of it like two silos side by side. One is full of knowledge, and the other is replete with applications. When you examine your “silos,” are they keeping up with each other, or is one lagging behind? If you’re building your life knowledgeably with proportional applications, you’re at the best possible place in your Christian growth plan. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/five-things-you-need-to-know-to-be-mastered-by-the-bible/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – There are many kinds of rest, i.e., power naps, sleeping, vacations, your career, mental breaks, coffee breaks, and the list continues. But there is one rest that transcends them all, and nobody will enjoy the fullest possibilities of rest until they learn and practice this one. It's a transcendent rest that rises above them all. There are two keys to ascertaining this most exquisite rest. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-402-two-keys-to-mature-into-the-best-rest-you-can-have/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Traditional biblical counseling does not work well if a counseling session, sprinkled here and there, is all you have. That strategy places the burden of change on the counselor rather than on the individual who needs a new kind of habituated lifestyle. Biblical discipleship happens in a 24/7 context where the person who desires change is availing himself of all the means of grace the Lord provides for transformation. I have listed a few of these means that have worked for me when helping a struggling soul carve out a new way of living. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/ten-habits-that-can-change-your-life/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – A theology of suffering is a theoretical reality with life-transforming implications if we can live it out robustly and practically, with God’s fame and the benefit of the community in view. Of course, the saying is true: “It’s easier said than done.” Learning how to live well with suffering should be every Christian’s desire because the promise from God, in the beginning, was that life would be a suffering one. In this episode, Rick presents four crucial ideas for those who dare learn these lessons. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-401-living-well-requires-a-transcendent-view-of-suffering/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/