Kate Hastings Show

Before you can determine your life's mission, I believe it is more necessary and valuable to figure out what prevents you from becoming whatever you want to be in life.  You create this story to match your limiting beliefs, which manifest in a persona you identify with.  The true challenge isn't in the mission it's self its removing the barriers in the way that keep you in a stagnant place.

  @coachkate1

Gratitude  when it is possible. However, while some  from gratitude, for most it is challenging. The reason has to do with an overactive nervous system. For many survivors, the reactive part of the brain is in charge much of the time. This is not because they do not try—or do not want—to be positive. Their nervous system holds them in a constant state of  reactiveness. The pain of trauma has left them feeling “not good enough,” ashamed, guilty, injured, and unworthy. Their upper brain is not engaged enough to overcome those feelings and contemplate gratitude on an on-going basis.

What are you dependent on every day when you get out of bed?  Likes on social media, how many texts you receive, how many empty people pay attention to you, and how many calories you ate ????  Wake awake and cling to the carrot known as truth.    @coachkate1    

Because we don't properly grasp how to see, hear, and comprehend our needs, we don't feel seen, heard, or understood by others. The problem is that most of us are in so much pain and suffering just going about our everyday lives that we feel alone, disheartened, and alienated from our true self.    @coachkate1 Phenyx Fit 1-1 Wellness Coaching   

When we avoid doing the work that is required to heal, we create a reality of resistance, avoidance, and chaos. Even after the storms have passed, we leave an overcast of suffering, resentment, and disconnect. The aftermath is your identity becoming entwined with the impacted version of yourself. When you heal, you may experience a sense of loss because your identity is closely linked to the person you thought you had to become in order to move on.   @CoachKate1 

Have you ever asked yourself what does it truly take to change? I don't mean your physical body, bank account or hair. I’m referring to the type of change that drastically alters your perception of who you are and how you relate to the world. I’m talking about the type of change that provokes your very being at a core level that shifts your habits, emotions, behaviors and to a level of awareness. I can't tell you what the truth is but I can tell you what its not.  Tune in!! @coachkate1 

What would your life be like in 10 years if you kept up with your current lies? What's the impact of living this way, and what are you willing to lose? And if you can't face the truth or at least tolerate it, get honest and admit you live a lie by choice.   @coachkate1    

Struggle to see how anyone would want to help you?  Ask yourself these 3 questions:      • While you were growing up what kind of messages did you get about asking for help? • Did your family place more value on “doing it yourself” or “letting others in?” • When you did attempt to reach out in childhood, how did the people in your life respond?   @coachkate1

Remember that you are afraid of the response and emotion that the word no will conjure up in you, not the word itself. Saying yes when you want to say no comes at a price: You burn out, you experience anxiety, and you devalue yourself. You have relationships that are toxic and you become resentful. You disrespect yourself and allow added stress to play the victim to not focus on you and your life.  Remember that you don't have to respond right away.  You can say: I need to check my calander ill get back to you tommorw.  What is the impact of being a people pleaser?

Anxiety can manifest itself in various ways when it comes to relationships. Fear of being left behind or not asking for things could be signs of anxiety in a relationship.   It can control your thoughts and affect many aspects of your life. Anxiety crumbles your authentic voice, causing panic and lack of self-confidence. Do you ever ? Wondering if you matter? Wait for something to go wrong? Look for reasons to break up? Constantly thinking your partner wants to break up?  Missing out on good times?   @coachkate1 Phenyx.fit

Whenever something good happens, something bad follows. Living with the expectation that sh*t will eventually hit the fan makes it difficult to acknowledge and accept when life is actually going good. It's difficult to celebrate your success when you feel unworthy of your achievement.You are deserving of good things. You weren’t put on this Earth to live “well enough,” you are meant to live an abundant, beautiful life.   @coachkate1

I don't think we ever ask ourselves, "Are we living our truth?" or "What does that even mean?" Instead, I think we grow up to conform to the truths surrounding us, which may or may not be aligned, but I believe that no one except you can determine that meaning. Before you can live and express your truth, I believe you must first confront the extent to which you tell yourself lies. Ask yourself how much debt you have in your life? What's the impact of living this way? Is my environment and life consistent with my morals, values, and beliefs? Listen in! IG: @coachkate1 Website: Phenyx.fit 

Living in a perpetual state of survival is detrimental to our health, relationships, goals, and overall quality of life. Stress is a warning sign; it prepares us to survive, whether by running or fighting the threat. However, it is not a condition in which one may prosper or live life with peace.  You settle for a lot less because you're frightened actually to put yourself out there. So you isolate and keep people at a distance. You avoid, overcompensate, judge, fear, flee, and hide. Survival emotions and behaviors are hard-wired into our brains and nervous systems. The choices we make, our actions, and our perceptions are all influenced by the dysregulated emotions we are experiencing at any given moment.     @coachkate1 

When you're doing the work, but it's still difficult. We refuse to heal because we do not want to endure the unbearable pain of uncovering buried feelings, fears, and memories. You are unstoppable once you have fully immersed yourself in your truth. To avoid pain or discomfort, we typically control aspects of ourselves and our lives. Pain is unpleasant, so we do this to alleviate it. But we also do this because we are worried that we are not deserving of something greater.   IG: @Coachkate1 @phenyxfit   

Tolerating the intolerable drains you spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. Have you ever been in an obviously terrible situation and felt nothing at all? Do you suffer from a lack of emotional detachment from yourself and others, resulting from your inability to feel?  A few bullets I touch upon in this episode. 1.) Recognizing your childhood mantra...  "Get a grip," "suck it up," and "mind over matter," "You're fine," it's not that bad." 2.) What are you tolerating and why? (truth) 3.) What are the feelings you are unwilling or afraid to feel? @coachkate1 @phenyxfit 

Have you ever thought to yourself, “How did I get here?” Why do the same friends, relationships, and events keep repeating? Almost everyone at one point in life has chosen to overlook red flags. We’ve suppressed our inner voice, which begged us to break up with that friend, don’t marry that person, and leave that toxic job. You are not weak or stupid, but human. Trial and error will be a part of the healing process; we won’t get everything right the first time. However, we can learn from our experiences and make better choices in the future. Everything isn’t a red flag, but if you grew up in an environment where boundaries were not respected, chaos was the norm, and toxic behavior was tolerated, you might not see anything wrong. We disregard red flags because we are terrified of expressing the truth to not be alone. So instead of facing the agony of confrontation, we engage in denial and continue about our business as usual. But, on the other hand, what is more lonely than being with someone who makes you fee

I speak from my personal experiences and can say I have a Ph.D. in this topic.  By becoming aware of the patterns in your relationships, you can see what exactly you are attracted to. You cannot control what you’re not aware of. However, you can develop awareness and create new patterns. Why do you keep choosing the same toxic relationships over and over again? If you’ve been abused in previous relationships (or in childhood), you may have a hard time labeling abuse as abuse because you’ve grown accustomed to it and have learned to blame yourself for it. People stay in unhealthy relationships because they get accustomed to pain. The fear of uncertainty is what seems normal. They believe that if they stick it out, things might change. With a false sense of hope and desperation, denial will keep you in a state of one day someday. (aka waste years of your life) lol   If you have low self-esteem or are codependent, you may be unaware of your feelings, guiding you.   Toxic attachment is hard to escape the cycle of