You Are Not A Frog

Do you give yourself permission to rest? If you’re like many people in caring professions, you worry that taking time out to look after yourself means not spending that time helping others. That thinking may have got you to your position now, but is it serving you, or is it time to update your operating system?The problem with rest is that we often confuse it with inaction. But rest from work doesn’t have to mean rest from activity. As this week’s guest, Nick Petrie discovered, for high achievers, rest could be going to the gym or Argentinian tango. Nick’s research shows that the way to beat burnout is not to stop doing things altogether, but to find things you love to do, but that are entirely outside of your sphere of work.Choosing what you do outside of work needs to be done with care, however. If you’re used to working in a fast-paced and competitive environment, a gym where everyone’s visibly pushing themselves to beat their neighbour might not give you the release you need.But engaging in activities or

We all get stressed or overwhelmed with our daily responsibilities from time to time. But we’re not always good at telling them apart. And this is important, because the way out of overwhelm is different form the way out of stress.Stress is caused when the demands on us outweigh the resources we feel we have to cope. Overwhelm happens when high amounts of stress make us feel like we can't cope with our lives' demands. The way out of overwhelm is non-doing, resting, and letting our nervous system settle down.Prolonged stress and overwhelm can lead to burnout, which just puts more stress on our nervous system, and makes it harder for us to function. In this quick dip, Rachel offers practical advice to help you take care of yourself, recognise overwhelm, and give yourself the time you need to rest.Listen to this episodeTo learn the difference between stress and overwhelmTo discover the benefits of non-doing and how it can help you overcome overwhelmFor practical tips on reducing overwhelm in the futureEpisode hi

Confronting anxiety is easier said than done. It’s hard enough with adults, but with children it’s even more tough. Anxiety keeps us safe, but often we over-predict that something bad will happen and under-predict our ability to cope. The key is to learn how to manage anxiety before it becomes a problem.This week’s guest is educational psychologist Nicky Odgers. She specialises in working with kids who are feeling anxious about attending school. A lot of what she helps kids with applies to adults – things like mapping thoughts and emotions to physical sensations, replacing negative thoughts with more realistic ones, and practicing techniques to help us relax.Anxiety can interfere with our lives and become a problem if it goes unaddressed. Naturally we want to avoid things that cause us anxiety, but this stops us from learning that we can cope and that the terrible thing we fear may never happen.Listen to this episode toLearn about anxiety in children and teenagers, and how it can manifest as school avoid

Do you find yourself thinking "it will be better tomorrow", or believing things will improve in a few months' time “when x happens”?In this quick dip episode, Rachel reveals how waiting for outside events to occur leads to more problems – because even when tomorrow comes, we’re still the same person facing the same challenges as we were yesterday.This mindset can lead us to looking for partial solutions which ultimately keep us from solving our bigger problems. But by focusing on our zone of power, we can reclaim agency over the things we can change, instead of waiting on events we can’t control.If we don’t try and take control, we can end up in a continued cycle of waiting for tomorrow to come. This leads to more stress, burnout, and exhaustion becoming the norm. But when we’re in our zone of power, we’ll find it much easier to deal with what today and tomorrow has in store.Listen to this episode toChallenge your "it’ll be better tomorrow" mindsetLearn practical strategies for creating urgency and focusing o

One way or another, menopause affects everyone at some point. If you’re not experiencing symptoms yourself, you almost certainly know or work with someone who is. That’s why understanding its effects and being able to offer support and compassion is so important.Women going through menopause can experience a wide range of physical, psychological, and hormonal symptoms. These symptoms often go unnoticed or ignored, which can impact confidence and increase anxiety. Lack of confidence or temporary difficulty in making decisions can lead to organisations losing talented, experienced women who thought they were experiencing cognitive decline. By perpetuating the stigma and embarrassment around menopause, we prevent women from seeking help and support.But there are resources and solutions available to help women manage their symptoms and continue to thrive at work - and Dr Claire Kaye joins us this week to talk through what we can all do.It starts with becoming more aware of the symptoms of menopause and recognisin

So many of us are caught up in a vortex of busyness. We end up working harder and harder without doing anything that re-energises us, all because we feel like we have no other choice.As healthcare professionals, we feel like rest is a reward for good behaviour, but it's a basic human need, and a professional responsibility. Why? Because rest makes us better at our job, and – frankly – we deserve it.In this quick dip episode, Rachel explores ways we can give ourselves permission to rest and remind ourselves that it's not something we need to earn. When we give ourselves that space, our wellbeing and productivity will improve.Nobody else is going to give us the time or permission, so we need to do this for ourselves. It will inevitably come with some guilt, but we can acknowledge that, then put our own wellbeing first and make it a professional priority.Listen to this episode toLearn about rest and how it affects our brainsUnderstand the different zones that we operate from, and how they impact our performanceG

For people in caring professions, trauma can be something we experience on a regular basis. an event doesn’t have to be earth-shattering to be traumatic, and if we let those “little T” traumas build up over time without addressing them, we can find ourselves in a constant sate of fight, flight, or freeze.When stress and trauma accumulate over time, we can minimise what triggers us and downplay our experience. Each time we do, we deplete our battery, pushing it from the green zone of calm and energy, to the amber zone of fight-or-flight, and if we’re not careful, into the red zone where accessing empathy and compassion – and even good decision-making – is much harder. This is often when burnout appears to come “out of nowhere”.But there are ways we can disrupt the burnout pattern, and tap into our nervous system to help us in those moments when we’re triggered.Listen to this episode toUnderstand the impact of “little T” traumas on our nervous system and how they can accumulate over timeLearn about the importan

We’re not just service providers – we’re carers and helpers. This can make it hard to set boundaries and prioritise our workload. What we need is air cover.By working together with your colleagues, you can create agreements about what to say yes and no to, and hold each-other accountable.And you can also seek out peers outside of work, so you can share your dilemmas and feel less alone. If we keep silently struggling with saying no or setting boundaries, we can start feeling burnout, which can affect our judgement.In this quick dip, Rachel explains how we can get some protection at work, and ask our peers outside of work for support.Listen to this episode toUnderstand the concept of air cover and how it can help with setting boundaries and prioritising workloadLearn about how shared accountability and informal networks can help give us air coverGet actionable steps for finding and using air cover to make saying no easierEpisode highlights[00:02:16] We're trying to solve the wrong problem[00:03:49] What happen

Do you ever feel like you're just not being heard? Or like you’re under pressure and no one understands how much you’re juggling? Especially in high-stress careers, few of us have the chance to truly be listened to – and coaching can help with that.Coaching isn’t therapy or listening to someone else’s advice. It's about exploring solutions yourself, with guidance. Coaching gives you permission to take a tricky situation and ask "If this were different, what would I notice?".Coaching allows you to “think to the end of your thoughts”, with someone who listens and asks really effective questions.Better still, by adopting a coaching mindset, you can help your teams solve problems using the skills and knowledge they already have.If you’ve felt burnt out, ignored or resentful, help is at hand. This week, transformational coach, trainer, and author Tom Dillon joins Rachel to explore how different coaching approaches can help you reclaim your agency, think more clearly, and act positively.Listen to this episode toLea

Have you ever had to do something you didn't want to do? Maybe it was a task at work, a favour for a friend, or a chore at home. It can be frustrating and draining when it seems we have no say in our actions. It can make us feel powerless and stressed out. And that's not good for our work quality or our well-being.But is that true? Do we really have no choice at all?In this Quick Dip, we share how to use power language to set boundaries and take back control of your life. Keeping your work and life balance in check can be hard when you feel like your freedom is taken away. You will learn seven simple words to help you regain autonomy.Learn how to set boundaries through your language. If you want to know how to regain control of situations that drain you out, this episode is for you.Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Find out what it means to give over connecting.Discover the importance of autonomy in motivation.Learn the seven words that will help you take back autonomy.Episode H

In the words of today’s podcast guest, “Everyone can benefit from neurodiversity”. But how much do you understand about the way it impacts you and your colleagues?Neurodiversity can be a real strength in high-stress roles like medicine. Different ways of thinking can allow us to cope with high pressure situations, handle complex information, and perform brilliantly in ways that others couldn’t.But it also offers us challenges, both when it comes to managing our own needs but also in supporting those around us. A great example is “masking”, where people try to hide elements of themselves in order to “fit in” with those around them. It takes a huge amount of energy, and can take a significant toll on our mental and physical wellbeing.You might have a diagnosis of something like ADHD, ASD, or dyslexia, or know a colleague or family member who does. But even if you don’t, all of us benefit from understanding more about different ways of thinking and seeing the world, and knowing how to support each other better u

It's a fact of life that we can't please everyone. That's why one of the hardest things to do is say no and try to keep everyone happy with our decisions. Even if it's against our will, we try to give a piece of ourselves to everyone. The thing is, that takes a toll on us until resentment builds up in our hearts. So, how do you expect pushback while staying firm with your decisions?In this Quick Dip, we explore the topic of pushback, how it affects our emotions, and why we should expect it. We lay down tips on removing guilt from receiving pushback and handling other people's reactions. It's one thing to expect pushback but another to deal with it. The first step is to accept the fact that there's somebody that will always oppose your views and decisions.Stand your ground firmly but compassionately. If you want to know how to expect and deal with pushback, this episode is for you. Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Learn the power of expecting pushback.Find out how resentmen

High-stress and high-performance professions like healthcare often push people beyond their limits. When this happens, stress and burnout are often the unfortunate consequences.In this episode, Dr Sarah Coope joins us to discuss how to avoid burnout by embracing your capacity. She delves into finding your optimal stretching point for each of your limited resources. Sarah also examines the nature of our fear of saying no. And we explore the consequences and benefits of managing and maintaining your capacity.If you find yourself stretched too thin, then this episode is for you. Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Understand your limits and capacity. Discover how to shift your mindset and avoid burnout. Learn how to embrace your guilt. Episode Highlights[10:30] Shifting Your Mindset to Embrace Your Capacity[19:30] Saying No to Avoid Overstretching Yourself[28:30] Identify Your Optimal Stretching Point[38:30] Managing Emotions and Language Usage[44:20] How to Deal

You have brilliant ideas and solutions that can make a difference in your work. But how do you get others on board with them? It can be hard to convince others when they have different views and opinions. The thing is, you can’t change someone’s mind without knowing where they are coming from and what matters to them. You have to face it with confidence, grace, patience, and, sometimes, acceptance.In this quick dip episode, we talk about how you can influence anyone by understanding yourself and them. We then discuss the impact of focusing on your zone of power and the importance of conflict and disagreement.Find out how to tackle any challenge with skill and insight. If you want to know how to influence others gracefully, this episode is for you. Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Find out what things are inside and outside your zone of power.Learn how not to get stressed when influencing people.Discover why you can’t control influencing someone.Episode Highlights[00:28] Ci

On this episode of You Are Not a Frog, our guest, Corrina Gordon-Barnes, joins us to discuss the challenges working mothers face in traditional family units. The conversation sheds light on the value of self-compassion, learning to navigate negative emotions, and striking a balance between work and family life. This episode is for everyone involved in parenting, not just mothers. It’s not just women who experience mum guilt!For a new perspective on mum guilt and actionable advice for a healthy balance between career and family life, don't miss out on this invaluable conversation with our guest, Karina Gordon.Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Recognise and navigate feelings of shame and mum guilt in your parenting journey.Discover the role of self-compassion and reparenting in achieving a balanced life.Understand the impact of societal norms and social media on our emotional state as parents.Episode Highlights[03:39] The Challenges of Motherhood and Mum Guilt[07:50] The Impact of

Disappointing ourselves and others is an awful feeling highlighted by guilt and shame. It can often lead us to act out regretfully as we attempt to mask it. Out of fear of its consequences, we resort to tiptoeing around others. This is most common in the medical field, where people tend to prioritise the needs of other people before their own. It could be why you may have difficulties saying no to people. In this quick dip episode, I will dive into how you can deal with disappointment. Learn to understand your needs and take action. Understand it's okay if you can't do everything or please everyone.If you’re a doctor struggling with stress because you are afraid to disappoint yourself and others, this episode is for you.Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Discover the source of your disappointment.Learn how to overcome your fears by saying no. Explore the benefits of prioritizing your needs above others. Episode Highlights[00:00] The Fear of Disappointing Others[02:

Does it feel like you're in a toxic work environment and can't get out? Too many doctors — both in the UK and elsewhere — find themselves in a whirlwind of work. There's always more to do, and you don't want to imagine the consequences of what happens if you fail. There seems like there's no way out, but the truth is, you always have a choice.In this episode of You Are Not a Frog, Dr Dike Drummond and I dive into a topic that affects many industries but is particularly prevalent in healthcare — surviving and thriving in a toxic work environment without burning out.If you’re a doctor stuck in the whirlwind of your toxic work environment, this episode is for you.Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Learn what you can change in a toxic work environment.Discover ways to improve how your career serves you.Find out how doctors can care for themselves and why that helps them do their job better.Episode Highlights[00:00] Doctors as Coal Mine Canaries[13:41] How Profit Creates a Toxic Work

Life can seem full of threats and stresses we face daily. As high-stress professionals, these types of situations are a part of daily life. All of this can place a great mental load on our brains and trigger our amygdala to not always respond in the best way. That's why it's important to learn how we can reduce these threats and manage our stress. The question now is how can we do this?Picking up where we left off, this quick dip episode dives into the last four factors of the SCARF Model. We learn more about tips and techniques that can help minimise threats and improves our response. Reward yourself and develop habits that can help you feel certain, in control, and supported even amidst all the stress.Learn how to better manage your stress and respond to difficult situations. Avoid an amygdala hijack when you listen to this episode!Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Find out what 'C,' 'A,' 'R' and 'F' stands for in the SCARF Model.Discover how being friends with everyone c

Our conditioning has trained us to rely on the egocentric left brain. We often overthink things, even when we have no control over them. But what if we didn't have to accept that this is simply how our brains work?This week, Dr Giles P Croft joins us to discuss his experience of having a TIA that caused his left brain to stop functioning properly. Giles shares what it’s like to access his right brain freely without any worry in mind. We discuss how our thinking left brain often gets in the way of us staying in the present moment. We also lay down simple ways to get reacquainted with our right brain.Don’t miss this episode and gain wisdom on how to be happy, calm, and connected.Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Learn how the left brain has evolved to dominate our thinking.Discover how the left and right brain consciousness works.Find out simple steps to get more connected with your right brain.Episode Highlights[03:44] Giles’s Background and Experiencing a TIA[10:17] How He Was F

Criticism and feedback are fundamental to growing as an individual and professional. However, often, our brain perceives such conflicts as a threat. The amygdala acts upon this and kicks in our survival instincts. As a result, we check out and shut down to protect ourselves. How do we avoid acting from this place of fear and focus on working toward developing ourselves?In this quick dip episode, we uncover the overarching principle of the amygdala. We discuss how to avoid an amygdala hijack and how not to operate from our threat zone. We have a choice around how we perceive and respond to triggers. We introduce the first principle of the SCARF Model and how to get over it.Learn how to minimise threats for yourself and others. If you want to know how to avoid an amygdala hijack, this episode is for you. Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Learn why avoiding amygdala hijack increases performance and happiness.Discover the idea of Civility Saves Lives.Discover the 'S' in th