Technically Correct

Little known fact: nutritional facts are listed in descending order by weight. If Tim has his way, Apple’s quarterly earnings reports will have ‘Services’ as the top ingredient. This week: both the SEC and Carlos have beef with Tesla, Jeffrey B. abandons his plan to get a brownstone HQ2 in Long Island, and what likely will be an immediately out of date discussion of Bryce Harper-gate. ⚾️.

With Amazon’s surprise acquisition of eero, podcasters everywhere expressed nervousness about the day Bezos Co. buys Squarespace and there is no one left to buy podcast ads. Not us though. We’re sustained by a generous grant from the John D. & Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation. This week: window cleaning robots, rumblings from the Genius Grove, and Tim Cook holds the editor of the Orange County Register upside down until all the quarters fall out.

“Psst. Hey kid. Yeah, you. Let’s make a deal. I’ll give you $20 a month and you give me root level access to all your web traffic, online shopping history, contacts, location data, personal connections, photographs, videos, life events...” This week: Carlos gets a robot, Apple celebrates National Privacy Day, Facebook pulls a Facebook, and Spindrift comes out of nowhere to top our Still or Sparkling® power rankings.

Loyal listeners, get your bingo cards ready because I think we might clear the board with this one. This week: EVs, mobile payments, streaming video, sparkling water, and a Canadian musician gets a PepsiCo payday.

If there’s two things we know about hockey, it’s that you never leave your goaltender alone when Sorenson is on the move and you definitely should have launched your streaming video project five years ago when it would have actually mattered.*

Tim wrote a letter.

Big news. We're brokering a partnership between Uber Eats and August Home to bring you mimosas from the kitchen straight to your couch via an app. Tech workers in the Mission will love it. In this holiday spectacular, we say good riddance to Paul Ryan, add a warm glow to your Mac's screen, and look for the bright spots in 2018. Items 1 and 3 may be related.

Okay, follow me here. Pre-made Christmas lights for your roof that spell out “stay in your lane”. Get our lawyers on the phone — it’s going to be big. This week: cable companies, gutter robots, and Carlos does some mythbusting by explaining the profound unexceptionalism of 2018 Apple. You can’t have your cake and eat it too, and then sell the leftovers at 40% margins while pretending it’s $300 off, Tim.

With the holidays upon us, it’s so important we not forget the reason for the season: Gritty, the Philadelphia Flyers mascot. This week: an even-handed evaluation of how unmistakably doomed Apple is, Google Home Hub and the voice assistant market, and Away’s new $700M suitcase.

Life comes with some hard truths. For instance: your time on earth is limited, iPads will likely always be poor productivity devices, and the most difficult of all: JoJo probably isn’t writing her own tweets. We’re sorry. This week: 538's projections on the Lakers taking the Senate in 2020, Disney+, M&M minis, and Ryan sneakily embraces the multipad lifestyle.

"It's been said that iPads are the worst form of computing, except for all those other forms that have been tried." - Winston Chruchill, working at an Apple Store, probably. This week: crawl spaces, elections, and Internet shoes for thirty somethings.

Apologies for the two week absence but Carlos really wanted a fresh croissant. This week: travel business, baguette spotting, electric car pricing shenanigans, and Ryan goes about kid-proofing his light switches.

If the past three decades have proven anything, it’s that new software solves every problem This week: diving into to OmniFocus 3, getting things done, and fractured attention as a service, FAaaS for short.

PITCH MEETING, Sand Hill Road, Palo Alto, CA: “we believe we’re strongly positioned to be the market leader for direct to consumer cute lil’ Apple Watch sleeping bags. We’ll give them quirky names like Jasper and Thimble, offer a home try-on, and we’ll be super passive aggressive to anyone that doesn’t sign up for our dumb newsletter and coupons.” This week: talking microwaves, lox and schmear, some grade-A flip floppin’, and as a special bonus — an avocado toast recipe from a prolific Michelin-starred chef!

“imma let you finish but the lakers had one of the best sports dynasties of all time.” Not quite, but 1989 and 2014 share more in common than you might expect! This week: color temperature, Guy Fieri, an in-car navigation summer miracle, and iOS automation with our pal, British Siri.

Like the Swallows back to Capistrano each year, as do the press to Cupertino every September. This week: Apple hits the clay with their new iPhone Tennis and Tennis Max, fall detection gets added to the Apple Watch just in time for PSL season, and Ryan does his best to argue a small uppercase “S” and a lowercase “s” are different things.

Stumpgrades and cold brew, smart homes and scooters. This week: Ryan is tired of seeing those Uber ads while Carlos is watching Giants games just for that one Buster Posey commercial at Picco.

Grammarians and mobile payments aficionados, rejoice! There’s a little something for everyone in this [v good] episode. This week: teaching your pup fetch using your busted eeros, the problematic tweets of a perennially problematic CEO, Amazon’s pie hands, and a supremely awkward comparison of musical taste.

With Twitter and @jack struggling to make the hard choices about their platform, we play a round of everyone's favorite game: Incompetence, Ambivalence, or Willful Abdication of Responsibility! This week: Pepsi ramps up adoption of Apple Pay, Tesla moves to integrate SodaStreams into the Model S, and Saul Goodman is installed as Uber's new CFO. Wait. I may have jumbled my notes.

After a month away for summer vacation, we’re back — and for one week and one week only, this is an all good news show. Join us to hear tales of marital bliss, calming Italian mountain roads, contactless transit payments, and the best canned cold brew you can find this side of The East Cut.