The Lapse Storytelling Podcast

Two dudes. Two bikes. 11,357 kilometres. What could possibly go wrong? Gavin Kennedy was one of those rare people who made a mad drunken bet and actually stuck to it. He wasn't a cyclist. He hadn't trained for this. But sense be damned: he was biking from Vancouver, Canada to God Knows, Argentina. All of Gavin's adventures, including way more than we could ever possibly mention on this show, can be found on his travelogue - www.twodudesonbikes.com. If that's down when you read this, tune in shortly. It should swing online again. Download Scenic Route HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.  

Kids are beautiful, wonderful, disgusting creatures, aren't they? Dwayne really really likes to spit. He's good at it. Really good. Maybe Guinness World Records good. What does one do with such talent? Evidently, you make archenemies with this week's storyteller, Karina Sims. Karina's the author of Sinners Circle. It's about purveyor of porn, Amanda Troy. By day, she's a sex shop employee. By night? Serial killer. If you dig Karina's voice, her sweet cynicism is all over her novel. Check it out. Download Mocking Bird HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

Rosa Del Duca joined the U.S. National Guard at seventeen. She'd spend nearly half a decade trying to escape it. This is probably the longest episode we've had since the beginning, but it's bite-sized compared to Rosa's experience as a conscientious objector. If I had all the time and all the money, her story could fill a feature. Fortunately, her (excellent) memoir fills that void. Hit up Rosa's site for more on her work. I recommend it. Credit for this episode's interview goes to Jessie Brennan. Bang up job, lady. Please, if you haven't, visit Patreon.com/thelapse and help keep The Lapse is business. The clock, she's a tickin'. Don't wait till she stops. Download The War Against War HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

George De Young was framed. And the Thai Police were in on it. It's funny, despite this being one of the show's more incredible stories, George has never actually listened to The Lapse. He pitched me on a lark from a Craigslist ad. Even after our interview, he still had to ask, "what's the show called again?" Hope we did you justice, George. Major thanks to Jessie Brennan for this week's transcription! I forgot to credit you in the audio portion of the show. You're the best. If you've yet to contribute to our Patreon campaign, please consider it. There is a clock, and it is ticking. Download The Good Guy Defense HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

Ah, the pity date. When you just don't have a good enough excuse to say "no."  Marshall Whitlock returns to The Lapse with what might be the funniest story we've ever had. Tact. Some got it. Some don't. If you're the cringing type, settle in. It gets awkward. If this show brings you just the smallest bit of joy, please donate to our Patreon campaign. We've got rewards ranging from behind the scenes access to personalized lessons in storytelling, straight from me to you. You can keep The Lapse living for as little as $2.00 a month. An affordable cause, if ever there was one. Visit Patreon.com/TheLapse today. Download Awkward HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

"Where do I download The Crew Change?" You won't find it. Not unless you know someone who knows someone. Not unless you're part of the underground, the cats who ride the rails. The drifters, hobos, and punks that hitch like it's a living. And why shouldn't they? They ain't got no other livin'. You won't find a copy because The Crew Change is the stowaway's bible. It's the Anarchist's Cookbook of the rails; a complete guide to when, where, and how to catch a free ride... without getting caught. Heads up! I'm on TV. Catch me Wednesday nights on The Audience Canada at 10PM on The W Network. Tune back in to http://thelapse.org where you can catch direct links to the episodes I'm in. Download Crew Change HERE on iTunes or stream at it the link below.

I was an eleven year old Peeping Tom. I loved James Bond. I wanted to be James Bond. Which is why, naturally, I became the founder and president of Spy Club. This is a first for The Lapse, in that this story is by yours truly, Kyle Gest. We'd originally recorded guest narration (big ups to William Hopkins, accent extraordinaire), but a couple catastrophes later, we couldn't use it. The final result is our very first story without an additional narrator. This is straight from me to you! I think it's a barrel of monkeys. A reminder for my Canadian brethren: I'm on TV! You can catch me Wednesday nights on The W Network at 10PM Pacific. Check your local listings for The Audience Canada if you're keen to put a face to the voice. Download The Spy Club HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

For a while, mum and dad are perfect. Right, even when they're wrong. It's only as we get older that our parents become humanized. People with problems. Linda Feuerhelm should've been too young to have that revelation, but as you'll hear in this week's episode... there's something very wrong with Linda's mum. Major, major thanks to Jessie Brennan for this episode's transcription and to Alex Ricci for the ongoing editorial assistance. I'm so sorry, I forgot to mention them both in this episode's credits. They're absolute gems. I'll be mentioning them again the next. I'm on vacation, so it'll be an extra week before the show returns. Worry not! We'll see you in three. Download Odd Couple HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

Emily Levy is 6"1'. If that doesn't seem like a big deal, try again. The average Canadian woman is less than 5'4". Emily is taller than 99.6% of all the world's women combined. This is the original, unaired pilot of The Lapse Storytelling Podcast. With a couple hiccups in our regular scheduled programming, I thought it'd be a treat to share just where The Lapse came from. It's funny. I didn't realize how much narration I did back then. We've all got a story to tell. A great story. Hell, multiple great stories. The trick is, while everybody's got one, it's the telling that makes the story tick. I started The Lapse with that theory in mind and I still believe it's true. I hope you dig this one. I'm still proud of it. Download Wish I Was A Little Bit Smaller HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

Gabriel Bellman has witnessed more disasters than any one person rightfully should. Volcanoes, earthquakes, riots, terrorism... Despite hopping around the U.S. from state to state, where Gabriel goes, bad news seems to follow. The strange thing about being a magnet for disaster? It begins to feel familiar. Routine. Call him unlucky, but the man lives to tell about it. Gabriel is the founder of the Frozen Film Festival in San Francisco. He's been running the thing since 2006 and it's begun to attract some seriously talented filmmakers. If you're going to be in San Fran July 17th - 20th, check it out. He's also a director himself; his latest documentary, The Bellman Equation, is available online. And if that weren't enough, Gabriel runs his own (250+ episode!) podcast Film 4 Thought. Download State of Emergency HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

This is, without question, the darkest episode The Lapse has ever aired. Try not to take what I'm about to say as reductive. Because when Wichita Sims underwent treatment for breast cancer, the ingredients were a known quantity: chemo, radiation, group counseling. It was standard practice. Routinized. Regimented. She stuck to the recipe and she lived to tell it. There's no such thing as boilerplate brain surgery. One slip, one miscalculation, and you may irreparably change a human being. When Wichita developed a brain tumor, her doctor told her not to worry. Unfortunately, that is where her story begins. For more on Wichita Sims, including her previous struggles with breast cancer, you can read her work online at www.WichitaSims.com. Download A Few Loose Screws HERE on iTunes or stream it at the link below.

Taking your conservative parents to Burning Man is one thing. Filming every moment is another. This marks a particularly special episode of The Lapse: two storytellers, one story. Speaking to co-directors Joel Ashton McCarthy and Bryant "Spry Bry" Boesen was a treat. Matthau and Lemon would be proud; they're an Odd Couple in the best sense, just mismatched enough to compliment one another. In a lot of ways, Joel has more in common with Charles and Lee, Bryant's parents. Rather than give away its namesake, aptly named Taking My Parents to Burning Man, this episode explores more of the dynamic between Joel and Bryant. I think it's a pretty fabulous companion piece. Two voices is a lot of work to edit with, so settle in for something special. It might be a while before this kind of episode again. In the meantime, you need to see this movie. Get tickets at the Soho Film Festival in New York for May 17th now because the film has sold out at every screening thus far. You can also buy tickets in Vancouver at th

The classic magician is a dying breed. Christopher James Schuh represents a sect of dreamers bent on keeping that tradition alive. Not a relic of vaudevillian past or some Criss Angel special still haunting Spike TV. I've seen the man float a table across the room with nary a wire in sight. He's good. Real good. If watching the illusion is fascinating, so too is getting a glimpse behind the curtain. This episode is for the kid in all of you. It's wonder. It's whimsy. It's Some Kinda Magic. For more on Christopher James Schuh, including tour info, videos, and pictures of the table trick in action, be sure to check out his site. Exciting stuff! We've recorded our very first international story with more to come. Busy, busy, busy but keep sending those pitches. Not good story will be turned away. And if you want to contribute to the show from behind the scenes, you can get details here. Looking for story curators, interviewers, and sound people, people! Download "Some Kinda Magic" on iTunes HERE!

Like strangers, like dangers, fear takes many forms. Ever wish you had an opportunity to reshape the smirk on every childhood bully? Give 'em all a good fistful of knuckles? Rob Puittinen got that opportunity in a way he never anticipated. Like Rob, I was no stranger to small town living. I grew up in the Fraser Valley, another peacefully named dung heap on the outskirts of greater Vancouver. Years from now, should I have a kid, here's the piece of advice I'll give him: "Livin' in a small town don't make you invincible, boy." With hope, my Canadian accent will have matured into a rugged southern drawl. Few announcements to make while you download.  The show's growing faster than I anticipated. We're getting a God's honest following here, and for that, I love ya. But as the workload increases, The Lapse Storytelling Podcast is Hiring Assistants. See that post for details. Number two, you might just hear The Lapse on satellite radio, XM Channel 123. That's right! PRX Remix dug us enough to license a couple e

You're pregnant. 43 years old. A 1 in 3 chance your child might have Down Syndrome. Do you follow through? Whatever your belief, understand this:  when the hard and fast rules of your life are thrust in front of you, it's impossible not to question them. Broad strokes of black and white morality soon blend to grey. Cue Lee-Anne Ekland. Fair warning: she's been through a lot. This week's episode gets a little ambitious, skipping and jumping between Lee-Anne's past and present. For me, it was like putting together a really good puzzle. I think you'll dig the result. After you listen to this story, you need to check out Lee-Anne Ekland's blog. Especially if you're a mother. Her story here continues there to this day. That's a spoiler warning if you're wondering. Download the story here on iTunes or hit the stream below.  

Mann Cuevas is a #1 hit-single popstar. Between you and I? It's a secret. A visit to Manuel's work in Vancouver might net you a free cup of coffee. A step off the plane with Mann in Mexico will likely get you trampled. For everyone who wonders what it's like to be Clark Kent, this is your episode. Whether you're familiar with his work or not, you should absolutely listen to the Mann himself, including his brand new Terra EP. Even if you're not a fan of the genre, the Mexican music industry is a fascinating wild-west of a place. If you just can't get enough Mann in your life, check out his hour-long documentary, MANN:2013. To be honest, I'm excited to see the turnout for this one. Either you've not a clue who Mann Cuevas is... or you know exactly who he is and that's the only reason you're listening to this podcast. I'll update you on the stats in the weeks to come. ¡Órale! Mexico! Get it on iTunes or the link below.

When you're a virgin, sex for the first time seems impossible. The older you get, the more futile the fantasy. But as the cliche goes, be careful what you wish for. Marshall Whitlock was one virgin too lucky.     This marks the second episode of The Lapse and I couldn't be more excited to share it. Marshall and I were university buds, a combo, like ale and bitters. Strong, dark, stout. Recommended in moderation. Trust me when I say this: you know a guy well enough, you're certain to pull a good goddamned story out of him. Not the least of which is how he lost his virginity. I'll make my listeners a bet: if you've lost your virginity in a more incredible, more outlandish way, send us a message. We'll have you on the show. Check out the episode below or nab it on iTunes.

Even cancer has a silver lining, at least when you listen to TJ Kelly's story. With her, the very fist episode of The Lapse is LIVE! I met TJ on a television show, of all things, debuting at the end of March. She's a fabulous, funny lady that'll make you laugh even in spite of her circumstances. We stumbled into the story when I asked her about her blog, a site she once owned called Girl in a Van, chronicling her adventures across the U.S. She'd stopped writing for it. When I asked her why, she told me she'd need a couple more drinks first. I obliged. You don't expect the C Word after a couple drinks. Where TJ's road trip ends is where this story begins. She hopes to one day publish a memoir on her experience. Sidenote: It's my birthday! Please do me one little thing. Like The Lapse on Facebook and share it with somebody, anybody. It'd sincerely help me out. That means more content from The Lapse and the possibility of food on my table. Get the episode here on iTunes.