Being A Better Man

I think as a species, we developed in such a way that when we actually spend a day working hard, working past the point of discomfort and working through pain. When we spend a day accomplishing something with the strength of our bodies we are rewarded with a unique sense of satisfaction that cannot come from any other source. It releases endorphins that make you feel awesome. I think, a special kind of endorphin you can’t get anywhere else. The post 215 – Work Like A Man appeared first on Being A Better Man.

Look, I know that you guys, the listeners of this show are not the problem. You are here because you want to be a better man after all. However, you can be part of the solution. It’s important because violence committed by men affects all of us. It affects the world we live in. It affects how men are regarded and thought of as a whole. By the way, the victims are not always female. Many, many young boys also suffer abuse from men. Not only that, but all these young boys who are traumatized by not only their own abuse, but the abuse they see their mothers and sisters suffer—how do you think they are going to grow up under that example. The post 214 – “So Called” Women’s Issues appeared first on Being A Better Man.

Here’s the deal, here is what I want to acknowledge. Every single man out there has a different starting point, that’s just how it is. In the great race of life some of us get to start on the starting line while other guys have to start a few yards behind us, and some other guys start the race way back there. Then there are those other few guys that get to start several yards in front of everyone else. Yet, we are all in the same exact race when you look at the big picture, and our starting point isn’t something we can choose. We can choose how we run the race though. The post 213 – The Great Race…Of Life appeared first on Being A Better Man.

You know right from the start when I decided to put this podcast together, I did so with the intent of inviting other men to join me on a path I was already on. The path of perpetual improvement, getting better in every area of life every day. That’s why I call myself “your fellow man in the trenches” in the intro. Because I really, really am right there in the trenches with you, last night I proved it. The post 212 – When We Screw Up…What Then? appeared first on Being A Better Man.

I get it, it’s kind of a natural thing. People are activated by bad news. People listen intently if you are talking about something negative. I think we are hard wired this way, we are drawn to bad news because our ancient ancestors had to address the threats in life first, in order to survive. The problem is, we don’t live in those times any more and much of the negativity we are exposed to isn’t a threat at all…it’s really just gossip. The downside of all this negativity in my opinion, is that we become infected by it. If we aren’t careful we get sucked into the drama and before you know it, we are contributors. It is a self perpetuating condition. Negativity breeds more negativity. The post 211 – The End Of Drama And Negativity appeared first on Being A Better Man.

To act differently, by a different standard of behavior when you are alone is a very natural thing to do. I’m not judging anyone for it because I’ve done that myself, we all have. It is a very common thing to do but we, men who have decided to be better men, are no longer common men. To have your behavior, thoughts, actions, and speech be consistent wether you are alone or around any group of people is a very powerful, liberating thing. It’s liberating because you are being yourself all the time. You don’t have to think about it. Obviously, if you act differently around different groups of people or when you are alone, then there are times when you are not being yourself. The post 210 – When Your’e All Alone, Impress Yourself! appeared first on Being A Better Man.

On this memorial day, wether you are in America or not, I suggest that you take some time to ponder the people who gave their life in service. Next, I suggest that you take a few moments to consider your own ancestors. Go to their grave if you are able to. Even if you don’t have any idea who your ancestors are. Even if you don’t know their names or their stories—you can still honor the fact that they existed. You can consider their life and their sacrifice, and realize that you came from them The post 209 – Memorial Day appeared first on Being A Better Man.

Today’s episode is kind of geared for the single guys out there. You guys who are attached may find it interesting as well though. My question for today is; why do you listen to this show? I really want to know, because it was recently suggested to me that men tune into this program because they think becoming a better man will eventually lead to them having more success in the dating / mating world. I’m not convinced that is your only motivation, so I would like to know what your reason is for tuning in. The post 208 – Why Are You Listening? appeared first on Being A Better Man.

What this all boils down to is what I started saying way back on the very first episode. When I told you to look in the mirror every day and take account of yourself and your life, so you could make corrections where needed. The term “every day” is a critical component of that formula. It’s also the part most often missed. Today’s metaphor is intended to help you visualize that every day part, and realize the necessity of it. The post 207 – Happiness Is A Sharp Chain appeared first on Being A Better Man.

What’s on my mind today is something that I read on Facebook a couple days ago. It was the lamentation of a female friend of mine. I think it’s important for us as men to take the time to understand how men are being perceived in the world. If you are going along with your life and you are a pretty decent guy it’s real easy to forget what women and other people experience. It is really easy for us to go through our life never feeling threatened or marginalized. So this is what she wrote: The post 206 – If Not Us…WHO? appeared first on Being A Better Man.

Hey everybody, welcome to Being A Better Man. I am your host my name is Alf Herigstad, and today I’m going to do something a little different. I’m actually headed out of town and my schedule is totally booked up for a few days so I thought I would replay an episode from December 30th, almost 6 months ago. It’s the last episode of 2016, number 147. I chose this episode because the content is still valid for one—but also because it’s an opportunity for all of us to check in on how this year is going. Are we accomplishing the things we set out to do at the start of the year? Or, do we need to change directions and do something different for the next half of the year? I’ll be back on Monday with a brand new episode. I hope everyone has a great weekend. The post 205 – The Power Of Today…again appeared first on Being A Better Man.

It’s amazing. When you get an agreement from someone prior to starting a conversation it’s a whole different world. Suddenly you are both free to express yourself without trying to prove something. You are exchanging ideas and opinions without someone insisting on being right. The best part though, is that you both have an opportunity to hear one another. People who are angry don’t hear, they can’t because they are too busy formulating their next verbal onslaught, instead of listening and responding. The post 204 – The Virtue Of Diplomacy appeared first on Being A Better Man.

I’m talking about this today because I think it’s important, that we all acknowledge our mother’s, and all the other mothers we know. The mothers of the world do more for the advancement of our species than any other force on earth. Each one of us, regardless of your circumstance owes your life to your mother. Even if you happen to have a crappy mother, you still owe her your life, and that isn’t a small thing. In short, what I’m trying to get across is that motherhood itself is a miracle. It is a magical, spiritual, biological, emotional phenomenon that we as men will never be able to grasp entirely…but we can acknowledge it. We can admit that it’s something we will never be able to do or be. It is something to be celebrated because without motherhood, civilization would not exists. Motherhood makes everything else possible. The post 203 – The Miracle Of Motherhood appeared first on Being A Better Man.

Some guys spend their whole life on that hamster wheel, and when they retire on a big pile of money they can’t understand why they are divorced or on the verge of it. They don’t know why they aren’t close to anyone, why their kids don’t really know them, and why so many friends aren’t around anymore. I’ve seen these men, they are lonely and sad. I think this is one of the most tragic fates a man can suffer. The post 202 – Home Life vs. Work Life appeared first on Being A Better Man.

Hey every body! I’m back! This is Alf Herigstad resuming the Being A Better Man podcast after mother nature took me out for a few days. As you may have noticed there was no podcast last Friday, or this Monday, and todays podcast is coming out late in the day. I am sorry for the break in continuity, it’s the first time that I have ever missed releasing an episode on time and there is a good reason for it. Here where I live in the wilds of Western Washington, we had a major weather event that causes severe damage. The post 201 – I’m Back! With a harrowing tale… appeared first on Being A Better Man.

I didn’t start this podcast because I know everything or have all the answers, I started it because I was on a journey. I have to tell you that putting these 200 episodes together, writing them, researching them, recording them…all of it has also transformed me. I can say without reservation, that I am a better man today than I was 464 days ago and I have this podcast and you the listeners of this podcast to thank for that. Thank you. The post 200 – 200 Episodes! Thanks To you… appeared first on Being A Better Man.

It’s not rocket science, we all kind of know this stuff already, but our biology and our passion and our excitement gets in the way of our intellect and the next thing you know we’re stuck somewhere that’s kind of miserable. When we are miserable, we can’t be the best man that we are capable of being. That’s why I’m talking about this, not for you exactly today necessarily, but for you in the future as well. We all encounter these situations in life, and if we can think about them before we get there it can help with our decision making process. The post 199 – Is She The One? appeared first on Being A Better Man.

When I read these descriptions, of which there are many more, I do not see a nice guy being described. What I see is a sad excuse for a male human. A spineless, self absorbed, candy-ass facsimile of a man who is pretending to be nice. The problem is…there isn’t anything nice about a guy like that. That’s why I feel like a truly good man, is by definition, an actual nice guy. He’s the real thing and not a pretend nice guy because a good man has a certain level of genuine care for those around him. Their safety and well being. Sure he might hurt feelings occasionally because he is being honest, but overall, that is a greater kindness to the people in his life than being a deceptive jerk. The post 198 – Defining Definitions; nice guy vs. good man appeared first on Being A Better Man.

As men we have to suck it up and do what we need to do as men so that we can enjoy the rewards of being a man. So that our families can be taken care of, our bills will be paid, all the things in our life including ourselves will be in good working order and most importantly…so that all of our relationships will be healthy, and happy. Not only that, but in our wake we will have left an example for the other boys and men around us. That is why the minutia of manhood is so important. The post 197 – The Minutia Of Manhood appeared first on Being A Better Man.

I think one of our jobs as a man is to learn as much as we can about everything. It helps you make decisions better because you have more data for comparative analysis. The more you learn about other people, the better understanding you will have of yourself, and of your impact in the world. If you develop a habit of paying attention to people and things around you you will increase in wisdom, confidence, and social intelligence. All of these things are really handy in a world with so many other people, each one of them a little different than you. There are so many interesting things to learn from our fellow human beings. The post 196 – You Don’t Learn Anything, When Your Lips Are Moving! appeared first on Being A Better Man.