Waifu Wars & The Five Minute Podcast

Dumbspringa has arrived. Guess how many times we ordered Grubhub in the comments! Unless you're reading this in a podcast player or something, in which case, just text us: (347) 705 7617

Nathen launches a talk show about hot dogs and hamburgers that discusses neither hot dogs nor hamburgers. Also: Andrew throws a Hussie-fit! This is a good one, my dudes.

What are they afraid of? What are they hiding? Why won't any Canadian grocery store stock Scooby Eats?

How much would you pay to keep your porn folder a secret? Who's the most offensive wrestler of all time? And how many 90 Day spinoffs can fit into a streaming service?

Gen-Z comes for side parts + skinny jeans. Sirancha sings today's top cringe hits. And Asterios, somehow, loses even more money.

Asterios gets into "crypto." Sirancha gets into Abby Shapiro. And Nathen Mazri overnights us a box from the GarfieldEATS in his living room!

Asterios spends his life savings on GameStonks. Sirancha pens a steamy tale. And introducing: Chicago Food Minute with The Thought Cops!

The boomer misses the boom. Dr. Fuck calls in about the future of cooming. And we listen to TWENTY FOUR VOICE MAILS!

We bring back some of our favorite topics & guests from the past 100 episodes. With Niko, Lime, Mimi & more!

Sirancha makes Asterios watch that Grubhub commercial. Asterios continues his campaign against the Reddit app. And the perfect Groomsman gift is decided upon.

Asterios takes Sirancha through the hilarious events of January 6th, 2021. 

Don't eat the salmon at TGIFriday's!

Sirancha makes Asterios watch "The Human Misery Channel." Asterios makes Sirancha eat cereal blindfolded. And Dr. Pimple Popper drains the holiday of joy!

Sirancha's dad drops some redpills. Asterios thinks COVID has "a branding problem." And Nathen just can't keep his lasagna frozen.

It's post-crash 2013. Fax machines are smaller than ever. Cyber-modems run at a blistering 28.8 baud. And TV channels? Yeah, there's over FIFTY. But in the ashes of Bay City, two...heroes (?)...will rise.

Sirancha gives the listeners a guided tour of JREG's astonishingly bizarre apartment. Plus: voice mails are back! For the last time?

Asterios gives his niece an anime intervention. Sirancha defends the cosplay-phobic. And how the Reddit app ruins our lives, and yours. 

Asterios is threatened by his niece. Sirancha hunts for a landmonster. And Nathen Mazri, we know you're reading this, you dirty namesearcher, you.

Our most disgusting episode yet. And that's saying something.

Sirancha explains Marijuana ETF's. Asterios explains "snooch to the booch." And the Crunch Bunch takes on Dunkin' Donuts cereal.