Video Games Are The Worst Thing On Earth

From the darkest depths of the most fucked up swamps comes another boiling hot episode of VGATWTOE. The Twin Matts (@M_Nerdskull and @BrianneandMatt) join us to allege some sourceless claims based on Bobby Kotick's libertarian beliefs. We dig into the depraved chugging of money that is the Blizzard/Activation layoff, revisit the cyberpunk discussion from an earlier episode and try to inject as much fucking politics into video games as we can. Along the way, we read the longest article ever for the podcast while drunk and check in with the latest masterpiece on the silver screen. Hell yes, we all podcastin'! A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese:

Original premium content--do not steal! Reese and Alton rope Misandry (@MisandryCannon) into a new bit where the goof crew leafs through ancient video game magazines to see what garmin' was like before the SJWs took hold. We talk radical fonts, revolutionary page design, and peer into the brief window when people took the 3DO seriously. It truly is a premium experience. For the full experience, follow along with us here!: https://archive.org/details/GameProIssue084July1996 A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com/yourverygoodbud ALTON: https://twitter.com/8ALTON8 Find out more at https://videogamesaretheworst.pinecast.co

Grease up the goose and get ready as a new VGATWTOE dawns. Honored guests, Terry Bolvanga and Victor, swing by to compare business cards and gossip about Paul Allen. We introduce a new feature that's literally just Reese talking about his ogre neighbor. Afterwards, the big brains go to town on the latest depraved hijinx of the mysterious magician, Randy Pitchford. Later on, we unwind by taking easy potshots at noted hobgoblin, Antman. Do you like trashing rich dipshits? You'll love this episode! A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com/yourverygoodbud ALTON: https://twitter.com/8ALTON8 Find out more at https://videogamesarethe

Podcast, thy name is Brain Breaker. Internet maven Brianne (@BriAggressive) and her boyfriend that lives in Canada, Matt (@BrianneandMatt), dare enter the skull crushing arena of gamer discourse for the amusement of our listeners. Alton breaks first when he learns the true name of the Pork Devil as we discuss GOG yet again. Reese crumbles shortly after during an ill-advised discussion about grisly gamer notions. Our guests remain stalwart and strong, though, during the tale of the XBOX support forum, probably due to their superior healthcare system. Also, someone gets cancelled--but who?! A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com

A darkness has descended upon the land, a game so evil some dare not speak its name. It is presided over by a vile being known as "Todd." The VGATWTOE meme warriors, Jordan (@jordha) and Roxanne (@snugcrow) steel themselves for one of the greatest takedowns in podcast history. Reese weeps at the terrible tale of the two hundred dollar preorder while Alton revels in the chance to merk his greatest enemy. Jordan gets cancelled for getting corny on main and Roxanne says hi. Tune in, cowards! A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=16464889 Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com/yourverygoodbud ALTON: https://twitter.com/8ALTON8

Rejoice podcast gobblers! Prepare to receive the latest episode of VGATWTOE directly into your skull! Fantastic socialist gamedev David Cribb (@colestia3) graces our presence to discuss his games and the larger questions of what goes into a leftist video game. We have a very special segment of Salt Mines where we dig into the chud response to his socialist teaching tool, POST/CAPITALISM, to roast all the goofhogs oinking about the communist game. Later on, Alton brainstorms a game about blasting out the back walls of famous leftists and Reese learns about the new Warframe expansion and the player response. Finally, we discuss gamers as a proxy for anti-union violence and how the large penal colony full of spiders has influenced David's work. David's Games: https://colestia.itch.io/ David's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/colestia/posts Articles mentioned: Warframe Fans Ask Developers To Avoid Crunch: https://kotaku.com/warframe-fans-ask-developers-to-avoid-crunch-1830327178 Gamer Rage as Anti-Union Viole

The holiday season reeks of rancid turkey and repugnant melancholy, let's keep celebrating Halloween instead with a very special, spooky, scary, goofy episode of VGATWTOE. Powerful video game warlock, Misanthrobob (@misanthrobob), joins us to discuss all thing frightful yet delightful in the world of games. First, though, Reese sets the mood with the late night campfire yarn of The Dipshit That Lives Next Door. Next, we dig our Thanksgiving meal of the spoopiest video games known to person or beast. Finally, there is a moment of tragedy as Alton learns that the party may not be all it's cracked up to be. Enjoy the thrills, chills, giggles, and deception of the Video Games Are the Worst Thing on Earth SPOOKSGIVING SPECTACULAR. Holly Green itch.io horror article: https://www.pastemagazine.com/articles/2018/07/5-retrogade-horror-games-you-should-play-right-now.html A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro mu

That's right, constant listener, yet another tasty morsel of podcast is here to provide you with sustenance and joy. Alton humors Reese through this BONUS MINISODE recounting Reese's trials and altered gaming habits after getting his dick wrecked by a hurricane. Alton and Reese discuss a number of RPGs and beloved retro classics to distill what they love about the shameful hobby of video gaming and what it means for the future. Later, they dump on the most beloved game of the year; a conversation that is sure to never have any repercussions. Also, Reese doesn't know how to pronounce the name of an extremely popular character and takes out his embarrassment on the audience. Music this episode: "Theme" from Phantasy Star and "End Credits" From Link's Awakening A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi

Are tired of having to make a decision between two sides? Well, VGATWTOE is here to let you know you can choose both and wind up ahead! That's right, campers, it's Boogie2988 episode! Matt of Brianne and Matt (@BrianneandMatt) joins Team Knucklehead for some thoughtful discussion about 2016's Gamer of the Year. Matt and Alton educate Reese on Boogie's origins, motivations, and ongoing reprehensible takes. He's said seven gross things since we've recorded! Later on, we put ourselves in the crosshairs by making fun of Red Dead Redemption 2 and break Matt's will on the wheel of gamer salt. Also, we call for war at least twice. Boogie and the Logical Sane Middle https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snZ7tYecBwI Boogie Internet Comment Etiquette https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QaVB_QH3Ndw Ending music: Boogie.exe by Devin Santi https://soundcloud.com/devinsanti/boogieexe Why Are You So Angry? Part 4: An Autopsy on GamerGate https://youtu.be/c6TrKkkVEhs A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those

Get angry, you damned nerds: a new episode of VGATWTOE is here! Renowned black metal sage, Misandry (@misandrycannon), debuts to teach us about the Theory and guide us in the dialectical method. Alton chugs deeply from the salt surrounding Rome II's controversial decision to occasionally look upon a woman, Reese brainstorms with the gang about Leisure Suit Larry's legacy, and Misandry dispels myth and myopia regarding reactionary views of historical accuracy. Also, we give ourselves ulcers hollering at goofballs mad about black people in the cowboy game. Most importantly, there's a cameo appearance from the Hot Pocket discourse. A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter

After gestating for endless millenia, a new episode of the VGATWTOE experience hatches from its shell. Legendary illustrator and gamer historian Dawnya (@xo_pinkishheart) returns to keep the knuckleheads in line as we devote most of an episode to Telltale's mass layoff. We do a roundup of the situation (condemning those responsible), a foul round of Salt Mines goes just about as deep as we can stomach, and, perhaps most importantly, we take a moment to discuss the most important thing to ever happen in all of culture. You and 95% percent of other podcast listeners got mad at video games while listening. A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: http

We are legally required to apologize for this episode of VGATWTOE that is too hot for censors or parents! Ageless ruler over all things podcast, Roxanne (@snugcrow), returns to scold Alton and Reese for their deplorable antics and capers. The team experiences the latest chapter in the neverending saga of loot boxes, swing back around to review the lameass Cyberpunk 2077 apology, and check out a brain-bending, too-online reading series that may be the greatest single segment of content we've dared to unleash upon our unsuspecting fans. Also, it's true, we go off the fucking rails digging into horny mods, hornier Yoda, and vile lies spread about Master Chief's suit. We don't give a good GOD DAMN about what you tell us--we know the truth about the suit. A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc

Storm's coming. Seek shelter in the tenth episode of Video Games Are the Worst Thing on Earth. The architect of the Shitty Gamer Takes twitter account (@gamertakes), Dawnya (@xo_pinkishheart), joins Alton and Reese to provide valuable expertise on repugnant gamers and their ilk. Speaking of repugnant gaming... we discuss the golden calf of Twitch, Ninja, and the sexism inherent with his "no girls allowed" policy. Later on, we take a gander at the dumbest statement ever made about memes, fighting wars with your wallets, and the dawn of a new gate. It was exceptionally cool of Dawnya to come on the podcast considering that talking about @gamertakes is at least eighty percent of the podcast--listen to reward this act of supreme generosity. A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-video

I believe it was Trent Reznor who once said "Video game music is hell of awesome, we should do a whole episode about it." So we did! Terry Bolvanga (who is free from twitter) joins Alton and Reese to tear up the airwaves with some of our favorite aural gaming memories. Reese delights the crew with some of his eldritch chiptunes, Alton moves us deeply with his rich orchestral scores, and Terry classes up the joint with his eclectic knowledge of some true classics (and Sonic the Hedgehog). Along the way, Elon Musk returns to collab with Grimes and we discuss how most Diablo 2 clones ain't that great. Youtube playlist of songs discussed: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJBfrPeBklHeQawMJBrSbKe2eP-oylAP2 A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotape

I believe it was Trent Reznor who once said "Video game music is hell of awesome, we should do a whole episode about it." So we did! Terry Bolvanga (who is free from twitter) joins Alton and Reese to tear up the airwaves with some of our favorite aural gaming memories. Reese delights the crew with some of his eldritch chiptunes, Alton moves us deeply with his rich orchestral scores, and Terry classes up the joint with his eclectic knowledge of some true classics (and Sonic the Hedgehog). Along the way, Elon Musk returns to collab with Grimes and we discuss how most Diablo 2 clones ain't that great. Youtube playlist of songs discussed: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJBfrPeBklHeQawMJBrSbKe2eP-oylAP2 A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotape

Do you hear those sirens? There's an overdose of video games in your soul and VGATWTOE is here to administer the Narcan. We're joined by the redoubtable Roxanne (@snugcrow) who has some proclamations about our direction in life, cool old games, and the foreverhell that is Star Citizen. Also, Reese tells a story about shattering the financial health of his family and Alton DESTROYS a reddit post about gamers with logic and reason. Bonus: a cameo from Victor and John Osborne that was definitely on purpose. A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com/yourverygoodbud ALTON: https://twitter.com/8ALTON8

VGATWTOE dives off-brand with a bonus episode that's not about video games! Seth Goldsmith (@infiniteseth) joins Reese to do a full episode analysis of the late capitalism nightmare: READY PLAYER ONE. We sneer in disgust at the sea of references, take a moment to slag TJ Miller, and puzzle over the ambivilant ending. We soften begrudgingly in the back half of the episode as we discuss Spielberg's career and a possible secret message hidden in the depths of the film and, in a touching moment, Seth gently explains to Reese the concept of art. Beware, we spoil the hell out READY PLAYER ONE and every other Spielberg movie and we don't give a damn. Alton's not in this one but he says hello and that he loves you. VGATWTOE is a podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: The Beepus of Film by Reese Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix

Episode six of VGATWTOE has escaped from the Ethereal plane so get ready to lose your god damned mind! Our good pal John Osborne (@jmarquiso) returns to the sweet bosom of our pod as an official Mark Kern correspondent. Alton and Reese spend a lot of time getting so angry about the unjust Arenanet firings that we give ourselves tumors. Then, we expose John to the Lament Configuration of game memes. Bonus content: a special message from a beloved youtube personality. Important meme reference material: https://imgur.com/a/EbORKSr VGATWTOE is a podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com/yourverygoodbud ALTON: https://twitter.com/8A

The god damned SJWs are injecting politics into Cyberpunk with the latest chapter of the VGATWTOE saga. Matt the Nerdy Skull (@m_m_myers) joins us to dismember cyberpunk and analyze the interesting bits found within, Alton guides his chummers through the mazelike caves of the cybersalt mines, and Reese fawns over Deus Ex like it's some kind of original opinion. Also, we trash Ready Player One (not for the last time). A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com/yourverygoodbud ALTON: https://twitter.com/8ALTON8

Emboldened by a lack of consequences, Team VGATWTOE cranks out another unit of objectionable content. John Osborne (@jmarquiso) stops by to roast games, gamers, and take a few easy shots at Firefall. We comb through the grimy reactions to pride month and grouse about Steam again. In the end, Alton finds Reese's lengthy tangents so repugnant that he ends the podcast early. C'est la vie. A podcast that reveals the truth about video games that those other video game podcasts don't want you to know. Co-hosts: Alton and Reese Intro music: Video Games by Envyneslies Envyneslies – Video-games Outro music: VIDEOTAPEMUSIC / Ecchu-Owara-Bushi Wearecc – Videotapemusic_ecchu-owara-bushi-videotapemusic-remix Thank you to Angelvila for the logo! Main Account: https://twitter.com/vgatwtoe Reese: https://twitter.com/yourverygoodbud ALTON: https://twitter.com/8ALTON8