The Joy Junkie Show

At the start of every year, it’s likely you get pumped up and excited to make some serious change. You decide on a handful of things that you are GOING to conquer this year, god-damn-it! But what actually makes those goals a reality? Throughout my 12+ years in this work, I have found that noble intentions have very little to do with bringing goals to fruition. Good ol’ fashioned gumption and desire are not enough to make your dreams come true. [sad trombone] In fact, a recent Inc.com article indicated that only 8% of people actually accomplish their goals. WHOA!! 8%!? Well, fuck. But, wait. Never fear, Babycakes, because this episode targets seven ways people tend to sabotage their own goals (without even realizing it) and how you can set yourself up to slaaaaay all your goals. It’s not rocket science, but if you employ some of these easy tactics, you will kill all your 2023 goals! Yes, please! This pod explores: My favorite tool to use to ensure you are tackling this goal for YOU (instead of mom/fam/boss/so

FREE PLANNING GUIDE WITH THIS EPISODE! If you’re like most people, you have an overwhelming sense of excitement and ambition come the new year. Also like most people, perhaps you hit Jan with a fire under your ass, but when Feb rolls around you have slowly begun to lose steam, fervor, and action. Also, 2022 kicked many of our asses, so there’s that to contend with. Many people (and maybe YOU) enter the New Year with many plans and intentions, but somehow end up a bit off track sooner than later. In this episode, I address the biggest obstacles people unknowingly establish for themselves when crafting New Year’s goals and “resolutions”. Yep, you read that right… many people actually make their job a shit-ton harder by not setting themselves up for success to begin with. I also share my personal planning tool I use to ensure I establish solid goals in aaaaall areas of my life (not just fitness and money… but, yes, those too). Be sure to grab your free planning guide so you can plan and organize a seriously epic

As we grow through our teen years into adulthood, it’s not uncommon to find a wealth of information about puberty, pregnancy, and infertility. Those transitions and obstacles are readily talked about and addressed.  But, our shifts in hormones are clearly not done after our thirties and sadly, our society has done women a massive disservice in not properly setting us up with education and tools to navigate perimenopause and menopause… or even how to know if they’re happening for you or not.  Add on the extreme stress of juggling careers, parenthood, ailing parents, and relationship struggles and many women find themselves in front of their doctors asking what the hell is happening to them. And sadly, the common western medical sentiment is to simply ride it out, lesson your stress (gag!), or start hormone therapy. There’s got to be a better way! [infomercial voice] Fortunately, there is. This week on the show, I dial up Dana La Voie, a Tonic Herbalist & Acupuncturist who has spent her career helping women

When told by older women that she would one day settle into her age and things would get easier, author Kaya Oakes thought, “Apparently at some point I would reach a magical age when I had ‘no fucks left to give.’ But no one had warned me that before I hit that magical age, I’d have to survive my forties.” If it’s not your face falling down, your bladder starting a coup, your hair falling out, or needing waaaaay too much sleep (I mean, this is unreasonable, isn’t it?), then it’s dealing with feeling invisible, grappling with your identity shifts, and wondering if it’s only going to get worse. Now don’t get me wrong, I know I have it easy. I know being in my forties is far from the end of the world. But something is for sure changing and I don’t hear a bunch of folks talking about it. In fact, when I look at social media, television, or other media, middle-age women seem to be visible only when advertising fiber supplements. Try searching any stock photo site for middle-age women and you’ll get a ton of women

If you are a woman in your 40s or 50s or beyond, it’s likely you’ve been slapped in the face with the realization of how emphatically our society values youth and beauty. You’re cruisin’ along, building a career, maybe raising some kids, and then BOOM! Everything gets thrown out of whack, your eggs shrivel up, and you’re wondering who’s body is this anyway? And, also am I fucking invisible? Navigating midlife isn’t really something we’re set up for… I mean, think about it. We get tons of “shoulds” about going to college, getting the good job, buying the house, having the family, etc. and then what? Once you’ve checked off all the boxes, you stand around wondering, Is this really all there is? I thought this was supposed to be the part where I’m happy! This week on the show, I dial up Jennifer Arthurton, the founder and creator of Old Chicks Know Shit, a community and a podcast designed to inspire and support midlife women in chasing their dreams and creating their kick ass next chapter. In this candid convers

Even though the holiday season is supposed to be all merry and bright and full of glad tidings, it’s quite certain that you’ve found yourself engaged with total overwhelm, buckling from the stress, and dangerously approaching burnout. Although fun and festive, it can take a sheer act of god to keep you from losing your ever-lovin’ mind during the chaos of this time of year, amiright!? If it’s not the multitude of gifts to buy or the food to prep, then it’s surely the family drama or workplace obligations that bring you to your breaking point. And while you’re spending money on shit you don’t want to buy or baking food for people you don’t even enjoy very much, you find yourself wondering why the fuck peace on earth has eluded you. But, lord help you if you don’t show up to the office party with the secret santa gift or all hell might break loose if you tell the in-laws you can’t make it this year. If you have found yourself overloaded by holiday stress and obligations, get ready for a huge sigh of relief. On

Ever feel like you just can’t quite enjoy the holidays because you’re in the middle of an emotional shitstorm that seems to make the season trying, stressful, and overwhelming? Maybe it’s your first holiday after being newly divorced. Or maybe it’s the fifth Christmas without your beloved mother, and you can’t seem to understand why it’s still so damn hard for you. Or perhaps you just moved your family across the country and although it was an amazing decision for you, you still find yourself incredibly nostalgic, overly emotional, and sensitive. If any of that sounds familiar, it’s likely that there is something in your world that needs a little processing. (And, no, there’s nothing wrong with you.) Perhaps what’s tugging at you is the need for full-on grieving the loss of a loved one, which feels exacerbated by the sentimental tone of the holiday. Or perhaps it’s as simple as “a case of the blues” because you’ve changed jobs and aren’t able to do the gift exchange with your previous company you were with fo

Ahhhhh, the holidays. The lovely time of year where your mom pesters you about why you don’t go to church anymore. Or your aunt gives you shit for not having kids or not being married. Or your uncle gets in a heated (uncomfortable) “discussion” about gun rights. Your favorite, amiright? Or perhaps you’re dreading the impending convo where your bro asks you for money. Again. Even though the holidays are supposed to be merry and bright, they can often be the most stressful when it comes to dealing with our families. Enter years of baggage, a shit-ton of guilt, mix in some alcohol, and you have a family holiday that leaves you feeling like shit instead of connected with those you supposedly love the most. If this sounds any kind of familiar, all is not lost. And, believe it or not, you can totally take back your holiday experience, boundary your ass off, and consciously CHOOSE your focus this holiday. Even if your sister is an ass-hat. This pod explores: How to prepare for your family function ahead of time to

Let’s say you want to go for a promotion at your work, but your inner voice keeps telling you that you’re an imposter. Who are you to go for this job? Or maybe you are thinking of starting your own business, but you know you’re lacking some serious confidence. Don’t you have to be super confident right off the bat to do something like that? Or maybe you tried going back to school but you failed your first test so you threw in the towel and haven’t been back since. When we talk about personal development topics like confidence, imposter complex, or navigating failure, we often think there is one specific trick or tool that will magically imbue us with all the confidence we desire, get rid of all our self-doubt, or make us immune to hardship. You know… just shittin’ glitter over here. Sadly, that isn’t the case. This week on the show I chat with my pal, Jane Atkinson, who shares a 5-part Thought Work Model which can help you bust through self-doubt, conjure some serious confidence, and contend with failure like

Applications are open now for my Mexico Retreat! Ever see super confident people and wonder how-the-hell they became so sure of themselves? Ever wonder if they were just born that way or if someone taught them or if some life experience shaped them into that person who oozes confidence and self-assuredness? However they came to that state, you could sooo get in on that action, amiright? In this episode, I dig into 7 super easy ways to build confidence immediately. You don’t have to read an entire book or become a totally self-help guru to learn how to place value on yourself… and it also doesn’t have to take decades. The tools presented in this episode will help you nail down what might be in the way of your self-confidence, identify what will kick your ass into gear, and snag some serious self-confidence in no time flat. This pod explores: Why “pride” is integral to your personal self-confidence and how to get you some How to get a handle on your self-talk so your inner voice is more like a cheerleader inst

Ever find yourself cruisin’ through Facebook, just minding your own business, and then BOOM! You see someone who is thinner than you posing in her bikini in her exotically sexy, annoying vaca pics and you instantly start comparing yourself to her. Or maybe it’s that one guy you used to work with sharing about his amazing work promotion for his new, totally awesome company, and your mind starts GOING OFF about how you just aren’t smart enough… not good enough… not accomplished enough. Just. Not. Enough. Maybe it’s not even Facebook or Insta… although they can be BEASTS in the whole comparison thing. Maybe it’s your co-worker, your neighbor, your bestie, or even your spouse that you constantly compare yourself to. And it usually ends the same way… with you CONVINCED that you totally suck. How do I know? Oh, honey, because I have soooo been there. And you are certainly not alone. In this week’s episode, I share four ways you can change how you address the comparison trap which will allow you to actually enjoy st

You’ve been in the same industry for 20 years and you’re dying to make a change but you’re scared shitless to throw in the towel. Wouldn’t that mean you wasted two decades? You’re not totally sure you’re getting your Master’s because it’s what YOU really want or if it’s because that’s what dad wants… or because it’s what a younger version of you wanted. Shit. What if you just don’t want that path any longer? Finish what you started? That’s what they say, right? You’ve always wanted to pick up and move to a new country, but jesus, how stupid would it be to quit your six-fig job? But, you’re so damn good at what you do! And so many people would kill to be in your position. But, then again, Italy is calling… If you’ve faced any of these harrowing decisions (or something similar) you know what it can feel like to toe the line of QUIT or PERSEVERE. I mean… how do you know if you should stick with something or if you should just quit while you’re (sort of) ahead? In this episode, I cover off five (plus a bonus), sp

Most folks (maybe even you) who have a love affair with achievement and accomplishment, find that their tenacity and attachment to perfection has created a ton of significant success in their lives. Maybe they even wear the “over-achiever” label as a badge of honor. Sound like you? Maybe your constant striving and achieving has enabled you to succeed in school, your career, or in your community. But there can absolutely be a dark side to achievement.  The obsession to achieve and be perfect at all costs can cause significant impediment to your happiness. How easy is it for you to simply rest, recharge, and do absolutely nothing? [gasp!] How often do you stand in judgment for others who prioritize fun and play over productivity? [shit!] How often do you really celebrate your accomplishments? Most overachievers have a hard time accepting compliments or acknowledging their successes because they are so focused on what’s next… What haven’t I accomplished? Where am I lacking or coming up short? You may also have a

Tell me if this sounds familiar: You get a Bachelor’s degree, but it doesn’t really feel like enough, so you apply for a Master’s program. You attain the Master’s but turns out, it doesn’t feel like enough either, so you start your own business. You set the goal to make six figures in your business, but when you achieve that marker, it somehow still doesn’t feel like enough. Maybe the key to happiness is to attain seven figures in your biz? Or maybe the goal should be to get married… or have a baby… or lose fifty pounds. So, you set up more lofty goals. Because, if you aren’t on a path toward attaining a big goal, what is your life even about? But, also, why haven’t any of these goals created happiness? Like, when-the-fuck is happiness going to show up? Does that scenario sound like the strategy of achievement you’ve employed in your own life? Through societal influences, systems of oppression, and families of origin, we learn very early on that there are those who achieve (aka the GOOD folks) and there are t

->>APPLICATIONS NOW OPEN FOR WORTHY. Perhaps some of the most challenging relationships we have in our lives are those with our own parents. Although we love them deeply, they are oftentimes the ones who present the most “issues” in our worlds and who tend to drive us the most batty. You feel me? I’ve worked with many students and clients who have the hardest time figuring out if they should sever a relationship with a parent, try to work on it, try to establish boundaries, or just give up on the whole thing altogether. Maybe you have found yourself tolerating shitty behavior from a parent because they had a horrible upbringing themselves or you’ve bought into the notion that “blood is thicker than water” so you let them get away with things you would never allow from someone you weren’t related to. We tend to emotionally regress around our parents which leaves us feeling inadequate, cowardly, and helpless. This sort of parental frustration is suuuuuper common and I’m sure you’re no stranger to a similar dyna

We’ve all heard of our inner child, right? That wounded inner child who is still reckoning with incidents occurring in our childhood. But, have you ever heard of your “outer child”? Tell me if this sounds familiar: You are going back home to visit your family and the minute you get around your parents, it’s like you’re 16 all over again. You’re angsty, everything is unfair, and you just want to burn incense and listen to music, yet hanging out with your fam makes you want to lash out and yell and scream and maybe break a lava lamp. And suddenly all of the coping mechanisms you’ve learned in decades of therapy are out the window. This, my friend, is your Outer Child. It’s a way in which we regress to earlier versions of ourselves and act out from that place when surrounded by triggering people. And, let’s face it, it’s often our family. In this week’s episode, I dial up Alexa Rae Schiefer, Trauma Coach and former mental health clinician, to ask her some heavy-hitting questions around the trauma we incur from o

->>APPLICATIONS NOW OPEN FOR WORTHY. I wish I had a dollar for every time someone told me something that happened in their childhood that cleeeeearly still affects them and then they say something like, “But, I’m totally over it though. It’s not that big of a deal.” Sure, sure it’s not. I would have, like, so many dollars. Here’s the deal: We never root for our trauma. We never really like the idea that something damaging happened to us in our youth. Or that we still carry around some disempowering beliefs bestowed to us by our primary caregivers. It’s much easier to dismiss the pain and say everything is just fine. Nothing to see here! Look away! The problem is that we are ALL affected by the things that happen to us in our childhood. And the subconscious part of our brain keeps tally of all of it. But just like the moniker implies, it’s all running beneath our consciousness. Ever wonder why you constantly feel the need to please others even though you know it’s impeding your work or your relationships? It’s

>>GET ON THE VIP LIST FOR WORTHY. I used to flippantly refer to myself as a Perfectionist and oftentimes I would elude to it being somewhat of a badge of honor. As I got older and my anxiety increased, I realized that being a chronic perfectionist was actually STEALING my joy instead of making my job easier. But, how does one just stop being a perfectionist? Perhaps you find yourself in the same boat; Vacillating between being SOLD on the idea that everything has to be just perfect and the conflicting desire to let things “go with the flow” or just be “good enough”. If you’ve found yourself in this dance, you are most certainly not alone. In this week’s episode, I break down just how detrimental the strive for perfection can be and how it often leads to much suffering, frustration, and angst. Additionally, I dig into 5, easy-to-implement steps you can take to begin allowing room for your humanity without sacrificing excellence and how you can maintain your integrity AND your sanity. This pod explores: Why “P

>>GET ON THE VIP LIST FOR WORTHY. So, you’re stuck. Not moving. Not taking much action.  You know all the things you should be doing to get where you wanna go, yet you don’t actually do it.  Or maybe you have no idea what you want to do and that is leaving you feeling stuck as fuck. (Side note: I feel like there should be a glue or tape company called “Stuck as Fuck”) And, it’s likely if you’re feeling stuck, there are a shit-ton of other things you may be feeling too. Maybe you feel some fear about starting a new career path. Maybe you feel overwhelmed from your current roles as partner, parent, employee, friend, etc. Maybe you feel anxious about getting back in the dating scene. And, then your behaviors follow suit. You’re scared to switch careers, so you procrastinate. You’re overwhelmed in your current roles, but you still people-please, adding to your overwhelm. You’re anxious about dating, so you obsess over being perfect before posting your online profile. Stuck af, rinse, repeat. Gah! So, what is one