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Toss Your To-Do List This is the time of year when people start thinking about getting more productive in their life.  Over time, I've learned there is a significant benefit of growing older and wiser, figuring out what works in most areas of life, and learning to avoid the school of hard knocks. I'm always amazed at how much time people fritter away deciding how to be more productive— trying to keep up with their never-ending daily list of things. Eventually, though, we all learn that a good life will always offer more opportunities than you can ever use. The day will come when it becomes easier to focus on essential and yield consistent results.  I ran into that when I learned to fly little airplanes.  Aviation is over one hundred years old. That means new pilots experience information overload as their Instructor crams their brains full. And flying airplanes can be unforgiving when you get things wrong. That causes you to micro-focus on tiny details - especially when performing your Pre-Flight Checklist. 

I can't tell you how many times I've heard somebody say— "If I knew I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself and saved more money." True or true? Modern times are interesting times, and when it comes to living a long life, people either think life is too short or long. If you do things correctly, long enough is the best answer, but 200 years ago, most folks didn't have the luxury of thinking about things like that. If you lived during those times, you lived at a slower and harder pace. And, since time is relative, your perception was slower, as well. Everything was slower. It would be like a two-week, off-the-grid vacation in a mountain cabin without your phone in modern times if you think about it. That used to be daily life. Yes, time-wise, living to the ripe old age of 40 felt like living to 100 today - if something simple didn't take you out sooner.  When California had open land, low-priced real estate, and gold in them-there-hills, almost everybody died much younger than t

My friend sent a note on a subject that profoundly resonates with me.  He asked me, "What's more important, passion or money?" Ask any person who knows me, and they will tell you that I am all about doing what makes my heart sing - PASSION!  After all, you know what they say — "Do what you love, and the money will follow!" I bet you've heard that most of your life. I will also bet that you have personal experience that would suggest otherwise, and there are millions of starving artists, writers, actors, and other creative types that would agree with your observations.  That list should also include stay home moms and dads, school teachers, police officers, and many more.  I believe there is no happier life than living a passionate life. I also believe that everybody has different monetary requirements that make them happy. And, I know that, while our quest to live with passion may be why we live a prosperous life, it's also what gets in the way of that life. If you desire to do what makes your heart sing and

Let me start by saying that goal setting is powerful, and you should be doing it - but there is a good chance that you are overdoing it. It's human nature to set goals, and you do it every day without thinking. That's why it's so powerful. It's also why it's so easy to set so many goals that you can never get any of them done.  Let me define how I see goals. No matter what distracts me, I've come to think of goals in two ways: 1) Legacy Goals that I will spend my entire life achieving. 2) Living Goals that will propel me to my Legacy Goals. I didn't think this way for much of my life, but one day, I accepted that no matter what I was chasing, it was the "who I would become in my life and how do I get there" thoughts that were always rolling around in my head.  My internal ScottLOGIC told me that if I'm thinking about something anyway, I might as well think about it purposefully. Also, since I've never met anybody who was happy to pursue daily activities that didn’t lead to something bigger, I knew that everyt

When my wife and I were first married, it wasn’t long before I learned that waking up at 5:45 AM, and every step after that, seemed to be programmed into her DNA - and I was not too fond of it. Over the years, I had grown to dislike mornings. Mostly because I found myself doing one of two things; the hustle and bustle of the daily grind or what the self-help gurus were telling me I “should” be doing with my mornings. Sometimes it worked. Sometimes it didn’t.  My wife, on the other hand, doesn’t do that. Unlike most folks in the world that are caught up in the drama of life, she operates with a “figure out what works, keep doing it, never think about it again” mindset.  If I’m being honest, as a widely creative, spontaneous, and go-for-it kind of guy, Joi’s mindless persistence drives me crazy. But, since there is no way to change her ways, I have no choice but to find my way. Besides, as a guy who has worked with tens of thousands of successful people, I’ve seen the same behavior so many times there is no den

Are you a person who always does things the same way or prefers to change things up at every chance? If you’re lucky, you are both. Traditions are the secret sauce behind the emotional connection we feel at this time of year. Family get-togethers, office gatherings, crazy shopping crowds? Yes. I know we’re in a pandemic, and not everything is as it used to be - but it is in our minds.  The traditions make our lives unique and are always present, never forgotten, and form the fabric of our lives. They are very human, and they are essential. But let’s get back to my earlier comment that “traditions make our lives special.” The fact is, somebody has to make the tradition.  Is that you? My wife and I were walking in the neighborhood and noticed that Janice was almost finished with her Christmas decorations. I stopped and said— “Wow. That looks like a lot of work!” “Yes, it is. But I love it, and it’s my tradition,” she said. “Well, thank you for making Christmas for the rest of us.” She didn’t know what to say, b

My mind is constantly searching for a simple, three-step process for anything that will help me get what I want, and that usually comes down to something I talk about a lot; making a decision.  I speak about decision-making much of my day because it’s the most dynamic tool you have in your personal development tool kit.  It should be easy — Almost everything you will ever want to do in life has already been done. The solution to getting what you want should be based on logic and proven steps. In other words, figure out what works and do it.  But, as much as we can all agree that it should be easy, using logic to get what we want doesn’t have much to do with being a human—that’s where emotions and a more phycological approach come into play.  “Come on, let’s just do what we know works?” You say. “No. I’m not feeling it. Let’s go with the flow and figure it out?” Logical vs emotional thinking is an epic battle that could be told by Stephen Spielberg in a blockbuster movie. Oh, wait, it always is! Let’s take a s

As we approach the most spiritual time of year, I find more and more of my thoughts are focused on what my future will bring. But instead of drafting a list of goals, my mind seems to settle into a different place— What if I could give myself a gift that would instantly give me what I want? What if I don't have to chase my dreams and start living them instead? What if there was nothing in my way - ever? While that way of thinking may seem out of touch in today's world, it's not. It happens every day for millions of people worldwide, and it can happen for you too. Here's a simple truth— Everything changes instantly and, very likely, forever when you make a decision.  If you hate your job and decide to quit, everything changes. Everything changes instantly if you decide you need some space for yourself, turn your phone off, and take a walk in the woods. If you decide to say "Yes" to yourself and "No" to others more often, you experience change. I could go on forever, but I don't need to. If you've been alive fo

I can’t remember her name, but I can tell you she was not a happy person.  It was a hot, hazy, and humid Virginia day when I arrived for a class reunion. As I stepped toward the check-in table, a friend of more than thirty years locked eyes with me, broke into tears, and screamed— “Oh Scott… can you help me? I’m not happy!”  Next, she bolted out of her seat, ran around the table, and hugged me… and hugged me… and hugged me… and hugged me.  This is not the first time this has happened, and being a professional, I knew what I was going to say, “Of course I’ll help, just let me get settled, and we’ll talk later”.  Frankly, I was buying time to figure out why somebody I have never known not to be happy was not happy. What had changed? Nothing! My friend found herself a full-fledged member of The Always Club, as in “I always wanted to be thin and in shape… I always wanted to find my purpose in life… I always wanted to make more money… I always… I was a member of The Always Club myself, along with about a gazillion

Sometime between Halloween and Thanksgiving, I found myself finishing leftover candy and bit into a Jolly Rancher - a recipe for disaster for anybody with a mouth full of dental work.  As you might have predicted, it wasn't long before I was at the dentist. I don't like dentists much. Maybe it was because as a kid, our family dentist was Dr. PAIN… uh… Dr. Payne. Still, there I was with the sound of drilling and suction filling the room, along with the occasional mumbled answer coming from my mouth, answering important questions like, "What have you been up to lately?" Then tell me not to move my mouth. Seriously?  Is that a skill they teach at dentist school?  Wait until your patient can't speak and ask them a question?  That's like me asking my young kids a question at the dinner table and telling them not to chew with their mouths open? But that's life.  Sometimes life doesn't make sense, even though I would argue that things are good almost always, which is why we notice it when they are not. And boy does

Over the past few years, there has been a trend in business toward an open, communicative, friendly, and supportive environment. While I believe that’s the way it should be, there has also been confusion amongst everybody in the company and customers. Who’s in charge? Who’s the leader? Where are we heading? Without a strong vision applied to the entire momentum of the company, there will be no momentum. And while ideas percolate from everybody involved, somebody needs to gather them into a vision that everybody can understand, believe in, and work toward every day. I spend much of my time consulting business owners who are running face-first into this issue, as well as employees who are experiencing it from the other side. Here’s where the first link in the chain breaks. Yes. Employees want to feel heard, valued, part of the team. And they love it when their bosses are part of their tribe and work to create an environment that makes them all feel respected and equal.  But… the boss is still the boss. Speaking

Is the Universe whispering to you and nudging you to move in a specific direction?  Before I go on, I need to admit that I am certainly not an expert in the Universe or it works in our life. The magic of gravity is enough to blow my mind, and the only Secret I know is that you are the only one in charge of getting what you want in your life. But what if you know that Universe is speaking to you? Calling you, compelling you to get off the sofa and do what you say you want to do? But you still won’t do it? Many years ago, I was in the habit of listening to those voices whispering inside my head and following whatever I thought it said for me to do. Eventually, after many false starts, I realized that the messages were not black or white. There didn’t seem to be any particular order, and they were almost always out of context with my life. In other words, blindly following my feelings often ended with me not getting what I wanted, and whatever I wanted to get away from became stronger in my life. One night at ab

When I began training and competing with my dog in agility, I made a rookie dog trainer mistake. I wasn't consistent, and my dog was getting confused. One day, my trainer said, "For a dog, one time means all the time. Every time you let them do something new, they're just going to keep on doing it." Now, as silly as it sounds, that came to mind a couple of weeks ago when my wife, a creature of routine and habit, did the same thing. We were invited to attend Thanksgiving with family, and Joi's training kicked in instantly— "I like going to their home, but what about leftovers? I like leftovers?" Now, as a guy who has experienced Joi's "No eating out at the restaurant until all the leftovers are gone" rule, I knew this was a big issue. But, like a good husband, I got out of the way and let her figure it out. A couple of weeks later, after enjoying a nice day, I watched as Joi carried her share of leftovers to the car, thinking to myself, "Good. She got her leftovers." Boy, was I wrong— Joi came home from the gy

I was on the phone with a client that was in a bit of a rut with her Real Estate business. It had been a good year, yet she found herself coasting and feeling like nobody wanted anything to do with her.  “What should I do? I know I can do more? I don’t know what to do?” I think most people feel like that from time to time. When that happens to be me, I always remember two things: “What you practice in private you will be praised for in public.” “The fortune is in the follow-up.” While that sounds good, the reality is that you will be spending a lot of time alone with your thoughts and discipline, building your future while everybody else is living and having fun. And follow up?  What do I say? Who am I going to call? What if they don’t want to hear from me? Word for word, that’s what my client said. My advice was simple: “You need to stay focused on how YOU do things so that you are prepared to show up and impress, and that’s the practice part. Next, you need to start “Making The Five.”  “Making the five?” Ye

If you knew me as a child, one thing would be true; that I was 100% a non-adult and would maximize my time getting away with being cute and funny. That’s what kids do - and I love it. Children don’t generally ask for permission or forgiveness. That’s has nothing to do with what they want to do. It never enters their mind. It doesn’t matter if it’s a good or bad decision. Once a child decides on their path, nothing will stop them. Most times, exploring Life isn’t an issue. Unless it is dangerous when most parents say— “Oh, they’re kids. Let them have some fun…” “They have to learn somehow…” “They’ll grow out of it someday…” But sometimes, parents intervene, stop the madness, and crush another childhood dream. While the kids may not know it at the time, Life just got in the way — something worthy of a temper tantrum of epic proportion, and that leads to a realization. “Someday, when I grow up, I’m going to do what I want to do, and you won’t be able to stop me.” Fast forward a few years, and the day arrives tha

My wife and I were looking for something on Netflix and found ourselves repeating the scroll a couple of times. Finally, the screen changed, and the graphic offered us a choice. It said, "just play something?" Yes, please. Just play something, so I can put the remote control down and get back to petting my dog. Thinking back on the moment, I was reminded of a book I read a long time ago. In 2005, Barry Schwartz wrote Paradox of Choice. It challenged the traditional thinking that said the way to maximum freedom is to maximize choice.  It may feel good, but too many choices lead to decision fatigue. Yes, too many choices are not necessarily a good thing, and they can create paralysis. Not to mention, no matter what you choose, you'll always wonder if you could have done better. Here's my advice to you: 1) Limit your choices. Having every option won't serve you. Narrow your list to things that truly get your attention.  2) If you find yourself confused, permit yourself to try other options. 3) If in doubt, choos

I’ve noticed in my life that humans are hoarders when it comes to keeping stuff in their life that works and doesn’t work. They keep hanging life their life depends on it. Now, before I go on, I think there are two situations at play here: 1) Hanging on to what has worked well but needs to go so you can do more of what you want to do. 2) Hanging on what doesn’t work in hopes that it will work well someday. Both can go on for years and lead to nothing but frustration as you continue to long for something else.  I was on the phone with a client this morning, and we ran into that situation. We began dealing with it a few months ago, and it’s still rearing its ugly head in her life.  After exploring it from every angle— Should I keep it? Should I put it to the side and come back to it? Should I toss it and start over? Should I… should I… should I. I finally said the only thing that came to mind - “The mere fact that you keep questioning it tells me that you want to drop it. You’re just worried about what comes ne

I was riding my Harley-Davidson Road King a few days ago when my mind suddenly thought - “The Chinese Philosophical concept of Yin and yang describes how opposite or contrary forces may be complementary, interconnected, and interdependent in the natural world.” What? What? Huh? It happened right in front of the Daytona Speedway and got me thinking about advice I give my clients about slowing down. It goes like this - “You must slow down to get what you want.” Advice like that is why I get the big bucks for what I do. No, not really. I get paid because nobody believes me, and it’s up to me to prove it. Let’s go riding. Whenever I’m cruising on my motorcycle, I love fast and loud, and it makes me smile. That’s the Yin of riding a bike, but you can only go fast and loud for so long before the light turns red in front of you or blue behind you.  Occasionally the place you were speeding toward gets congested, and you have no choice but to slow down. But when you are a high-performance machine designed to go fast,

"You need to get out of your comfort zone if you want to succeed!" I can't tell you how many times I've heard that. Thankfully, that silly advice is something I've only accepted a couple of times. I hated every second of it, ran right back into what makes me comfortable, and have never told anybody to get out of their comfort zone. "But, Scott? Isn't getting out of your comfort zone how you get what you want?" Yes, and no. Don't get me wrong. I firmly believe that you should continually be expanding the limits of your comfort zone so that you can grow into the next chapter of your life. I think you should be pushing the boundaries of your comfort zone right up until you feel the bubble around you about to burst.  Why do I believe this so strongly? Because you will never perform to your full potential if you are not comfortable with your situation, environment, skill set, and just about anything else.  Yes, you will do things that scare you from time to time, but you will only grow when the drama subsides, and

Sometimes, I scratch my head when people say something that I can’t believe is true. That has happened over the years when my wife, Joi says silly things like - “I like to paint. It’s fun. I don’t like to do it all the time, but I like to paint.” I guess it’s a perspective thing.  I’m not particularly eager to paint and would prefer to pay someone to paint. Joi likes to paint and chooses not to pay something to paint. So, if it makes her happy, I let her paint, which leaves me in an awkward situation of meandering around the house feeling guilty that she is painting and I’m watching paint dry.  I wonder if she hatched this evil plan to make me feel like a lazy husband? It’s good she works out so she can keep climbing that ladder? Is that paint on that expensive workout outfit? Hmm… she does seem to be enjoying it. Oh well, happy wife, happy life - right? I guess it’s a perspective thing.  One day, Joi was painting my office. I walked into my world domination chamber and she was up on a ladder with a confused