Pirate Monk Podcast

On this episode: Nate and Aaron talk about different seasons of life. They share how important it is to balance parts of life, including: work, friends, play, and scheduling. Our Guest: Sam Jolman shares how he asked his brother to clarify sexual questions for him. They discuss how many people are sexually awakened and then immediately shamed. Sam shows us how to welcome one's sexuality, learning to respond with awe instead of lust. He talks about the different experiences of coming to sexual intimacy regulated and unregulated. And Aaron discusses how he raises his Ebenezer. Links:   Sam Jolman Book: The Sex Talk You Never Got: Reclaiming the Heart of Masculine Sexuality Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this minis

On this episode: Nate and Aaron talk about healthy play. Nate shares what it's like to attend 3 intensives in 2 months. He shares the joy and relief in attending intensives instead of leading them. Our Guest: Shane Ramer is an old school skater, recovery coach, and podcaster. They discuss recreation and fun in sobriety and fighting the boredom. Shane shares why community is important, even when we may have found it in the wrong places at times. How giving back and volunteering helps to heal and grow along the healing path. Also, when to surrender and ask for help. Links:   That Sober Guy Podcast That Sober Guy Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women wh

On this episode: Nate and Aaron are back for another episode of the podcast a few people will enjoy. This podcast took a year off of Aarons Life. Planning for the Italy and Germany retreats are discussed, as well as Octoberfest. Our Guest: Dr. Carrie Cole is director of research, training, and runs the “Love Lab” at the Gottman Institute. She performs analysis of relationships. Carrie shares through research that men are more emotional than women and stay that way longer. Discussion includes reasons for jumping into a new relationship too soon (rebound), even if by accident, having sex or being physical too soon, and the desire to be cared for. Aaron discusses his @$$hole theory of dating. Other topics include helping all couples grow and understand the perpetual problems in a relationship. Carrie also offers a tool to help couples repair after an argument. Links:   Gottman Institute Carrie’s Contact Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upco

On this episode: Nate and Aaron bring the podcast back. Aaron wears pants and a hat on Thursday. Nate is still swimming and reads Lonely All the Time. And Aaron goes to jail. Our Guest: Vickey Easa is a therapist and podcaster in Boston Mass via SoCal. She discusses the cultural challenges of how sarcasm is avoiding vulnerability and also blocks intimacy. Understanding how males use insults to show love, especially in the show Friends. Vickey helps couples work through why we keep reacting and not connecting. Seeing each other’s pasts and stories, and how it has shaped their present messages. Vickey shares the downsides of how the brain reacts in self-preservation when there is a desire to connect. She offers simple steps for couples in the form of time-outs to help rebuild after arguments. Links:   Unmess Your Mind Book: Lonely All the Time: Recognizing, Understanding, and Overcoming Sex Addiction, for Addicts and Co-Dependents Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts

On this episode: Aaron interviews returning guest Andrea Ashley. Andrea is the host of the Adult Child podcast. She’s the only child from an alcoholic household who became sober at 19 years old. She shares her story of learning and implementing boundaries with her parents and others. Andrea shares how she has learned to see her inner child and stopped trying to correct it. She talks about how her friendships have grown over time as she has gotten healthier. They discuss the isolation of going deeper when others aren’t there. They consider importance of endings and that they aren’t all your fault. Andrea also discusses how suffering and pain cause positive healthy growth. Links:   Adult Child Podcast Instagram: Adult Child Podcast Youtube: Adult Child Podcast TikTok: Adult Child Podcast Events: 2024 Samson Summit If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podc

On this episode: Rob eats turtles and recommends the MickeyD’s app. Pablito eats fair foods and illustrates safety in vulnerable discussions. Our Guest: Nate talks to Nathaan Demers. Nathaan is a psychologist and has a passion for getting quality mental health to the underserved. He has come up with a unique way to help men that engages through humor. Nathaan talks about the many free resources as well as the ability to connect to a real person for help in under 60 seconds. Links:   Man Therapy Operation Veterans Strong Grit Digital Health Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women who have been impacted by our choices is availa

Our Guest: Aaron dives right into the interview with Tim Timmons, musical guest for the 2024 Summit, pastor's kid, musician, worship leader, Tennessean by way of California, sporting a magnificent beard. He talks about growing up with the "husky" label, a home life that blew up as a young teenager, and his mother's intentionally taking the arrows to protect his relationship with his dad. Tim had a crisis of faith as a young adult, navigated with the help of incredible men who gave him permission to doubt well. It is the journey of doubt that forms us, not the answer to the question. Tim then was given a cancer diagnosis with five years to live.  That was 23 years ago. Hanging out with prostitutes and a rethinking of church.   Links:   Tim Timmons Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is

On this episode: Aaron gets out of bed to podcast and shares his “chesticles up” perspective. Jason shares what he looks forward to at the retreat and favorites from past retreats. Mark has some kind of ailment that Aaron can't pronounce and shares his experiences with Andrew Bauman. Our Guest: Nate talks with Sam Louie. Sam shares about the religion of work and his journey to becoming a counselor. Sam is a first-generation Chinese immigrant to the United States from Hong Kong. He shares his inadequacy about ethnicity, career, body, and masculinity. Sam says the shame he feels can be felt by eight generations. He shares the fantasies and escapes he developed trying to cope with his insecurities. He encourages us to embrace the shame and look for the positive intention behind the addiction. Links:   Passport to Shame: From Asian Immigrant to American Addict Prodigals International Sam Louie Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to

On this episode: Join Aaron as he talks to our guest Tim Fletcher. Tim’s journey includes pastorship, being on disability, and becoming a temporary counselor that has turned into a passion and career. Aaron and Tim discuss the history of trauma and therapy in Canada, the past, and even in the Bible. Tim shares that adapting to trauma (addiction), helps us survive childhood but messes up adult life. He also helps us understand and see less obvious addictions and escapes, such as: over-working, over-volunteering, and control. Links:   Tim Fletcher Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women who have been impacted by our choices is

On this episode: Aaron talks to returning guest Chris Bruno. Chris leads story work counseling at Re-story Counseling, and guides groups of men at the Restoration Project. Aaron and Chris discuss the history of “rites of passage,” women raising boys, and consequences of boys going to approximations of manhood. Chris has written a new book called: Man Maker Project. This book helps guide males (and females), even without kids, in fatherhood, brotherhood, and sonship. Join along as they offer hope and love on this part of the journey. Links:   ReStory Counseling Restoration Project Man Maker Project: A Father’s Guide to Initiating His Son Into Manhood Sage: A Man’s Guide Into His Second Passage Brotherhood Primer: A Man’s Guide To Turning Buddies into Brothers Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this

On this episode: Aaron, Mark, and Jason start the show at 9:05pm Tennessee time. Mark talks about sharing his story in a co-ed setting. Our Guest: Nate and Aaron talk with Ian and Tamara Dowling. Ian gets excited and talks fast. He shares about how his childhood abuse and introduction to pornography shaped his view of relationships. They discuss the importance of seeking healing for yourself and not to save a relationship. Ian and Tamara share how their marriage has healed and grown as they have experienced healing in therapy and intensives. They also discuss the financial hardships and how it led them to begin Lit Path Ministries to give scholarships and help others on their healing journeys. Links:   Lit Path Ministries Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of

Our Guest: This week, Aaron interviews Matt Wade. Matt’s life started as a small boy. He’s now a couples counselor specializing in EFT therapy. Matt discusses his journey of not being supported in becoming a pastor and how he had more of a passion for ministry than a passion for Jesus. He shares how his childhood abuse led to promiscuity to find acceptance and love. Matt encourages us with the healing that occurs in relationships once there is empathy for one another. Intimacy is established where there is no secrecy. Matt leads us to engage our spouse in curiosity, not judgement. Links:   Unstuck Therapy Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Su

Our Guest: Aaron has a talk with Trent Dollyhigh. Trent is from Mayberry. Yes, that Mayberry. He grew up with whistling, fishing, violence and pornography. Trent was also youth pastor to Andrew Bauman. He shares that Andrew was a student of his and now he is a student of Andrew. Trent discusses how unresolved trauma is usually repeated, and the value of understanding an abuser's history. In his ministry, Trent “helps men die a good death so they can live a good life.” Finally, he addresses why having intelligence is not enough to heal. Links:   Be Vulnerable Mentoring Christian Counseling Center Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for

On this episode: Pablito is not Nate, and Rob is back from retirement. Together, they compare improv to recovery. Our Guest: Aaron and Tim Ice interview Joel Roberts. Joel shares his transition from military career to becoming a therapist. He discusses how our culture and church are not characteristically raising men to be husbands and fathers, and how important it is to pursue growth in those areas. Understanding why it is important of share your story from the perspective of villain, victim, and hero. Links:   Deeper Stories Counseling Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women who have been impacted by our choices is availabl

On this episode: This week Aaron goes solo. Our Guests: Daniel Weiss and Josh Glaser. Josh is executive director at Regeneration Ministries where he works with parents, equipping them in the digital age with kids. Daniel comes from Focus on the Family, where he specialized in healthy sexuality for families and now, he equips leaders to promote Gospel-centered sexuality in the church. Together, these gentlemen co-authored a book to parents from parents titled: Treading Boldly Through a Pornographic World: A field Guide for Parents. The book helps parents get involved in discussions about the body and sex with their children. It also helps the parents address their own sexual stories. Finally, it helps parents understand why this is important, addressing what is the good in all of this. Links:   Josh Glaser, Regeneration Ministries Daniel Weiss, Sexual Integrity Leaders, Inc. Book:  Treading Boldly Through a Pornographic World: A field Guide for Parents. Events: 2024 Samson Summit If you have thoughts or questi

On this episode: Nate and Aaron made it back from England. Aaron gets up at 2am. Our Guest: Aaron and Nate have a discussion with Justin, Jason, and Mark. Nate is anxious about going to a group intensive lead by Andrew Bauman and wants the guys to give him the lowdown. Justin, Jason, and Mark share what they experienced as they recently went through the retreat together. They share how recovery is more than an intellectual fix or sobriety. The group discusses why it's important to have multiple avenues in the process of recovery. How recovery is an adventure and not a death march. Links:   Andrew Bauman 4-Day Retreats Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsoc

On this episode: Nate is travelling. Aaron hosts solo and has many sub points. Our Guest: Dr. Joel Muddamalle. Joel resides in North Carolina via Chicago. He co-hosts a podcast with Lysa TerKeurst and Jim Cress called Therapy and Theology. Joel shares his journey of trauma to arrogance then humility. He guides us to see how safe curiosity brings us to humility and back to our own humanity. Joel also shows us that we can have peace and rest via codependency on God. He gives some practical exercises on sharing with others to help us see ourselves in truth to overcome the lies of our past. Links:   Joel Muddamalle Therapy and Theology Podcast Books:  The Hidden Peace: Finding True Security, Strength, and Confidence Through Humility Weakness is the Way: Life with Christ Our Strength by: J.I. Packer Events: 2024 Samson Summit If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on

On this episode: Nate and Aaron talk about Father's Day in England and time zone challenges. Aaron smokes everything, even asparagus. Our Guest: Returning guest Michael Johnson became a marriage expert as a single person and felt led to start a marriage ministry after 10 years in his own marriage. The discussion includes seeing beyond the obvious by supplementing feelings with facts. How to reprogram your sex drive by keeping dating out in the open. Michael shares why its so easy to fall for the wrong person. Fun facts include stats about arranged marriages and love marriages being basically equal in happiness and success, and that your sex drive is good. Links:   Future Marriage University Book: Date Like You Know What You Are Doing Book: Fit To Be Tied Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this pod

On this episode: Aaron gets socks, and Nate just got back from recovery church. Our Guest: Matthew & Joanna Raabsmith are founders of Renewing Us Recovery, where they help couples renew and repair relationships affected by sexual addiction, infidelity, and betrayal. Matthew shares his journey from youth pastor back to seminary where he and Joanna learned of the connection between therapy, psychology, and faith. He also talks about his road to recovery from sexual addiction through the 12-step process, and later to helping other couples in the healing process. Matthew & Joanna share the importance of having community -- males, females, and couples -- to go deep together. Links:   Renewing Us Recovery Free stuff from Matthew & Joanna Book: Building True Intimacy Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The

On this episode: Aaron has been writing. He turns one book into several books. Nate and Aaron also discuss the gospel, recovery, and dealing with the internal parts. Our Guest: Fausto Estrada shares how his story of addiction took him from Honduras to a place of healing in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. He shares that reading more books, getting married and having kids did not cure his addiction. He became involved in Prodigals International. After much success, he translated the material to take to those in need in Spanish speaking cultures. Links:   Prodigals International - en Español Events: 2024 Samson Summit Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women who