Who Goes There Podcast

For months now, the horror community has been abuzz about The Lighthouse. (Review at 36:34) The sophomore effort from Robert Eggers (director of The Witch) stars Willem Dafoe and Robert Pattinson, and it has a lighthouse; not much else is known. The trailers for The Lighthouse didn’t do much to show what the film is actually about, leaving most viewers heading into their viewings without any clue what they were in for. Fear not, my little nerds, for we are here to be your light in the darkness and guide you safely through these turbulent waters. Hark as we bellow out our opinions, not just to hear ourselves talk, but to lead you to cinematic safety. Was one of the most highly anticipated films of the year smooth sailing or were our hopes dashed upon the jagged rocks of disappointment? Come find out. Just concentrate on how good it feels to be causing someone pain. That’s the best thing you can do for a true masochist! Well, that and making them listen to the Who Goes There Podcast episode 235!

I don’t fully understand why, but Hollywood has this massive hard-on for releasing sequels to comedies 10 years after the original is released. With the exception of Super Troopers 2 they have all been absolute garbage. Anchorman, Zoolander, Bad Santa, if you loved a comedy in the late ’00’s chances are there’s a terrible sequel that recently came out. It seems to only make sense that one of the most successful zombie films ever should get the unnecessary sequel treatment. This brings us to present day and the release of Zombieland 2: Double Tap. (Review starts at 24:00) Get it? Double Tap? It’s like, one of his rules, but also like a pun, because it’s a sequel, double, two, same. Yeah, it’s basically more of that stuff. It’s all good though, now Rosario Dawson is in the movie, so there’s that. With endless love, we left you sleeping. Now we’re sleeping with you. Don’t wake up. X-cept for the Who Goes There Podcast episode 234! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscr

This week is the saddest week of the entire year; it’s the week after the Telluride Horror Show. We had a blast hanging out with old friends, new friends, and some friends we met for the first time. Oh, yeah. We also watched a ton of horror movies. Fear not, little nerds, I’m going to run down the stand out films at the 10th anniversary of the Telluride Horror Show. Now I know you’re bursting at the seams with excitement to hear my recap, but we’re also doing a movie review! Last week Hulu quietly released a little horror film about a group of kindergartners in the zombie apocalypse. For this reason alone we couldn’t pass up Little Monsters. (Review at 29:12) We drift through the universe, from planet to planet, pushed on by the solar winds. We adapt and we survive. We listen to the Who Goes There Podcast episode 233! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. That means for less than the cost of a beer, you get bonus content, exclusive merchandise, and special g

Sah, dudes! I’m posting this episode from the Telluride Horror Show tenth anniversary! I know I say this all the time but this is absolutely my favorite weekend of the year. There’s just something so special about getting together with a bunch of like-minded dorks, in the middle of nowhere to watch hours and hours of horror films! Although I may be having a blast out here there is work that must be done! On that note, we recently sat down to discuss the film everyone is buzzing about: Joker! (Review starts at 22:00) I would sit here and try to write clever things or run down what else we discuss on this episode, but I’m not going to. I have about 30 minutes to get this episode up, get a bite to eat and make it to the screening of 1BR. He looks likes something that fell off my dick during the war. It’s the Who Goes There Podcast episode 232! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. That means for less than the cost of a beer, you get bonus content, exclusive m

It’s finally October! The one time of year all of us misfits are able to be ourselves and everyone thinks we’re just in the holiday spirit. Speaking of spirits, this week we decided to take a trip down memory lane and head all the way back to 2001 to reexamine Thirteen Ghosts. (Review at 25:24) When talking to people about Thirteen Ghosts everyone seems to remember it fondly. However, no one seems to recall having seen the movie in “a really long time”. Fear not, ye little dorks! Your friends at the Who Goes There Podcast are here to fill you in on all the ghosts boobs, brutality, and terrible acting you may have forgotten! May the wings of liberty never lose a feather. It’s the Who Goes There Podcast episode 231! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. That means for less than the cost of a beer, you get bonus content, exclusive merchandise, and special giveaways! Most importantly, you get to help us continue doing what we love. The Who Goes There Podcas

Guess who’s back in the mother fuckin’ house, Hell House, that is! After what seems like an eternity, the time has come to shut the doors on the Hell House franchise with Hell House LLC III: Lake of Fire! (Review at 42:33) Four years ago, we checked into the Abaddon Hotel and were treated to one of the most enjoyable and unnerving cinematic experiences in recent memory. I’ll admit the sequel was every bit as good as a Motel 6 continental breakfast. But we were promised the finale to the trilogy would hands down be the crown jewel of the franchise. In the studio this week is horror author and Patreon haomie Brian Asman. Together, we will let you know if you should check into Hell House LLC III: Lake of Fire. Or maybe you just should keep heading down the road until you get to Motel Hell. In addition to our normal hilarious hijinks, we still can’t stop talking about The Fanatic! (Full review available exclusively on Patreon.) We’ll also give you our thoughts on the first episode of American Horror S

Howdy, y’all! I apologize for the episode being late this week; I aggravated an old back injury and have been dealing with quite a bit of pain. Fear not, my little junkies. We’re here with another dose of hilarious horror hijinks for ya! This week we’ve got a double dose of dude-bro delights as we discuss 2019’s Freaks (Review at 9:14) and 2017/2018/2019’s Tigers Are Not Afraid (Review at 30:27). Y’all know during this time of year we LOVE to feature movies from the Telluride Horror Show (October 11-13) and Tigers Are Not Afriad was Alia’s stand out film from THS 2018! This week we skip news and get right into the meat and potatoes of the show! You’ll still hear our thoughts on a few of the movies we watched this week, and a lot of stupid, stupid jokes. So my philosophy is, let’s have some beer and listen to the Who Goes There Podcast episode 229! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. For less than the cost of a beer, you get bonus content, exclusive m

A few days ago I was driving home and listening to an old episode of the show; it was the Killing Ground episode from 2017. In the pre-show banter for the episode we talked about how we would have to wait two years for the final season of Game of Thrones and the sequel to It Chapter One. The reason I bring this up is because we all know how well the final season of Game of Thrones turned out. Now here we are, two years later and It Chapter Two is fresh in theaters. Will It Chapter Two be the sequel that Chapter One deserved, and we all needed? Or will we all be left shaking our fists at the sky and cursing whatever “God” would do this to us?! We also talk about some other movies, and we talk about some goings-on in the horror community…ummmm we probably insult each other and make dirty jokes too. So that’s fun. I leave for five minutes, and when I come back everyone’s a fucking alien. Now, if I have to Men In Black your ass, you’re gonna fucking take it! It being the Who Goes There Podcast epi

Man, oh man! Have you guys seen that new movie The Fanatic?! It’s a new movie directed by Fred Durst of Limp Bizkit and stars John Travolta of all people! We had totally prepared to review The Fanatic this week, but then we decided that this film is something that is so magical, that we only want to share it with Patreon. The decision to make this cinematic masterpiece and Patreon only pick left us with a hole in our calendar, a hole that we decided to fill with a movie that itself was going to be a Patreon exclusive. This week, we’ll be reviewing 2009’s Laid To Rest (review starts at 25:34). Do you like tits, blood and gore? Because this movie is full of it! Just have a look at the bad ass image below. In addition we’ll be running down all the movies we’ve been watching recently. “Which movies?” you may be asking. Well, I don’t remember, so why don’t you have yourself a little listen and find out for yourself, dork? That’s the trouble with the world, Sarah darlin’. People got different ideas

Congratulations, everyone; fall is finally here! It’s that time of year when everyone starts to post memes about how much they love pumpkin spice, or how basic you are for liking pumpkin spice. In addition to overpriced sugary beverages and and spoopy decorations, it’s horror movie season! What better way is there to kick off the most wonderful time of the year than to review the last horror film of this hot, hot summer: Ready Or Not? (Review starts at 32:50) Oh, silly me. Did I forget to mention that Alia is back?! For the first time since her accident Alia is on the show to discuss one of the most talked about films of the year. We also talk about nuns with guns, cheesy 90’s werewolves, shark fighting and so much more! Mirrors are not but tools of vanity, Patricia – I know! Vanity – sensuality, Patricia! The Bible speaks of our vile bodies. It’s the Who Goes There Podcast episode 226! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. For less than the cost of a be

At some point we’ve all heard someone say only two things in life are guaranteed: death, and taxes. Well, dorks, I’m here to inform you of a third certainty. It is a damn near certainty that as you get older the things you loved as a child will be dug up and repackaged for a younger audience. He-man, Big Trouble in Little China, Pogs, rollerblades, all of these things that I would obsess over as a ten year old, are now being released 25+ years later. For this reason it should come as no surprise that the Hollywood greed machine has come for Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark. (Review starts at 26:56) Perhaps listening to three entitled assholes talking about a film adaptation of a book anthology from 30 years ago isn’t your thing. It’s also quite possible that you happen to love the sultry sound of our voices. If you find yourself experiencing both of these feels fear not, for there is more in store! Matt updates everyone on Alia’s condition following her motorcycle accident and surgery, Rhett discusses th

This passed Tuesday my wife and occasional co-host Alia was in a very bad motorcycle accident and sustained some major injuries. In addition to some severe road rash Alia’s jaw was broken in two places and she broke a few teeth. Needless to say we were unable to record a new episode this week. Rather than not release anything we decided to post one of our favorite episodes from the past. A Who Goes There classic, if you will. We’ll be back on schedule this Friday with our Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark episode. If you would like to contribute to the GoFundMe page to help cover Alia’s medical and dental bills, you can contribute here. We appreciate all of the support we’ve gotten from all of you. We have a long road ahead of us, it’s nice knowing we don’t have to go alone. Thank you. I’m not going to post a silly quote from a movie this week. I’m just going to use this space to once again say thank you. So, thank you. If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscriber

Konichiwa, dorks! As you may have noticed, we’re trying to do the occasional “throwback episode” in an attempt to keep things fresh around here. That, combined with the fact that in the past we’ve only talked about two anime films (Vampire Hunter D, and Castlevania), we decided what better time than now to cover another one. We’re hopping in the way back machine all the way to 1997 to cover Satoshi Kons directorial debut: Perfect Blue. (Review starts at 30:46) We also discuss the latest horror news, some films we’ve seen in the last week, and TWO video games! (Cultist Simulator, and The Witches House) So, you know, like, download and listen. Because this shit, this is the good shit. Let me ask you something. How come you’re asking me so many jackassy questions? It’s the Who Goes There Podcast episode 224! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. For less than the cost of a beer, you get bonus content, exclusive merchandise, and special giveaways! Most importantly

Yo, do not miss this episode! We’d heard a lot about 2016’s horror/dark comedy Night of the Virgin, “it’s fucked up!”, “it’s so gory!”, “a must watch!” Well, we all know how everyone is wrong except for us, so we decided to check it out for ourselves. (Review starts at 32:20) This episode gets just as bat-shit crazy as the movie does. In fact, there’s about 30 minutes of insanity that we had to cut out, but luckily you can check it out if you sign up for our Patreon! As always, we’re running down the latest horror news including something really cool about Killer Klowns From Outer Space, and a new film interpretation of Tomie! If that’s not enough to tickle your pickle, we also give our thoughts on Stranger Things season 3, Tone Deaf, Deadtectives, Clarita and Once Upon a Time In Hollywood. Come get you some, dorks! What are you, some kind of a Swede? You’re talking to me in Swedish in Times Square! It’s the Who Goes There Podcast episode 223! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining ou

Hola, dorks, and welcome to another episode of the Who Goes There Podcast! Comic Con 2019 has finally come and gone, and we’ve all become a little more bitter and cynical. This week we’re discussing 2019’s Luz, a paranormal, demon, mind fucky film. (Review starts at 32:18) This film mostly flew under our radars until it was released in mid-July, and since there are no major studio films being released this week, here we are. We’ll also be running down some of the cool shit from Comic Con, as well as the movies we’ve seen recently. (Including: The Thing: Confessions of a Teenage Placenta, Island of the Fishmen, and Dead Sight. They call me Dick, but you can call me… Dick. It’s the Who Goes There Podcast episode 222! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. For less than the cost of a beer, you get bonus content, exclusive merchandise, and special giveaways! Most importantly, you get to help us continue doing what we love. The Who Goes There Podcast is ava

Ahoy there, dorks! Welcome to another episode of Semi-Professional Podcast Reviewer Theater! We may not be the only podcast full of braindead bros who don’t know shit about movies and add nothing to the discussion, but we’re the only one on Dread Central! This week, we’re heading down to Florida to chill with some gators and laugh about how idiots are getting eaten. No, we’re not talking about beefy boys on bath salts, we’re talking about 2019’s Crawl. (Review at 23:48) If that’s not enough to tickle your fancy, we’re also running down the biggest news events of the last week! That’s not all! If you act now you’ll also get, us making lots of crude jokes, us laughing too hard at those jokes. All while inflating our fragile egos and not actually contributing anything of any value to the discussion of this film, or cinema in general. Check it out! I like a dog-faced monkey that has an appreciation for expensive sports cars. I like the Who Goes There Podcast episode 221! If you enjoy the show, ple

Rejoice, ya dorks, for summer is finally here! The time has come for rockets red glare, summer loving, bonfires and bar-b-ques. Just like every hot dog is bound to split its bun, every A24 film is bound to split the horror community. Well, it is my job to inform you, the split has happened again. The latest release from “elevated horror” juggernaut A24 is Midsommar, Ari Aster’s follow up to 2018’s Hereditary. (Review starts at 30:11) As you would imagine, the highly anticipated release has the horror community split right down the center, and the Who Goes There Podcast is no exception. This week we’re joined by Patreon haomie, and author of I’m Not Even Supposed to Be Here Today Brian Asman to dissect this film like a big ole’ grizzly bear! Is Midsommar the atmospheric nightmare it claims to be, or is it just a holiday in the sun? Who loved it? Did anyone hate it? What are the odds that Matt didn’t understand what went on? Tune in to find out, dummy! These people just have a stoned look on the

Are you aware of the fact that there are a group of people out there who are afraid of pasta?! Yessir, the fear of pasta is a completely real thing and it’s called Zymarikaphobia. I know what you’re thinking, and I completely agree with you, it’s stupid. You know what fear is not stupid? The fear of spiders is not stupid. As a matter of fact, the fear of spiders is so incredibly not stupid that Hollywood made a movie about it! This week on the Who Goes There Podcast we will wax poetic about 1990’s Arachnophobia, the story of one spider’s travels from the the jungles of Venezuela to the middle of nowhere America. (Review starts at 22:56) In addition, we run down some of the other movies we’ve seen this week including Flesh Blanket, Winterskin and Dead Don’t Die. Do you want to hear us talk about the ways we used to get faded at school? We do that too; it’s hella tight. You’re lying. It didn’t die. You took it. You’re lying. You witches! You’re lying! You’re LYING! It’s the Who Goes There Podcast ep

Alright everyone, let’s be honest with ourselves here for just a second. Most of us hate the fact that a good amount of the “new” movies released every year, are remakes. Furthermore, most of us are really stoked that the majority of these remakes are hot garbage. Even further still, most of us took to the internet with a fervent anger when we heard that a Child’s Play reboot was in the works. Yes. A lot of the anger came from the sensitive group of “qUiT rApInG mY cHildHoOd, LeAvE mY fAvOrItE mOvIe AlOnE!” fanboys we’ve learned to expect and ignore. However, the new Child’s Play remake is a different beast entirely. This particular remake is being made with a reimagined antagonist, without the now iconic voice of Chucky (Brad Dourif), and is being made at the same time as a Child’s Play TV show that DOES have OG Chucky, voiced by Brad Dourif! Wowie Zowie! Fear not, lil’ dorks! Your buddies at the Who Goes There Podcast are hear to open up 2019’s Child’s Play to “see what we’re working with.” (Review

Here at the Who Goes There Podcast we pride ourselves on being 100% honest and genuine in our reviews, and sometimes that rubs people the wrong way. Thankfully it has been a while since we’ve really pissed anyone off, and well, that just isn’t going to cut it. We’re going to (try to) start doing regularly scheduled “throwback” episodes, where we look into films released prior to 2000; this is the first of those episodes. We’ll be going balls deep into the cult classic/fan favorite/Kurt Russell approved Event Horizon. (Review starts at 25:43) This is destined to be one of the most divisive episodes in WGT history. Now I have another reason to hate Christmas. It’s the Who Goes There Podcast episode 217! If you enjoy the show, please consider joining our Patreon subscribers. For less than the cost of a beer, you get bonus content, exclusive merchandise, and special giveaways! Most importantly, you get to help us continue doing what we love. The Who Goes There Podcast is available to subscrib