Get Out Of Your Own Damn Way Podcast

// Have you ever fantasized about having a superpower? Maybe you secretly wish to fly. See through walls. Be invisible. Be invincible.  Well, I can't help you get any of those powers. And honestly, they seem like they just might be more trouble than they're worth. Imagine flying into high rise windows. Or having to see the weird things people do when you're not looking. If you were invisible, I bet people would trip over you all of the time. And being invincible? I don't know about you but I'm exhausted just thinking about that one. But what if I told you that you already have a superpower? One you use every day. One you likely neglect and take for granted. One that when properly focused and directed can help you get your heart's desire.  No, this is not where I wish you back into your bottle. This is where I reveal the incredible superpower that fuels all of your decisions and shapes how you approach change.  Yes, change. We are still on that. But starting this week I'm turning up the dial to FABULOUS. And

(function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = "//forms.aweber.com/form/03/1913935303.js"; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-yxmr0v1i6")); When's the last time you baked cookies? I don't mean the last time you bought a tube of dough and sat in front of the T.V. binging on carbs and romantic comedies. I mean an honest to goodness, full-on batch of homemade cookies involving a mixer and bowls, an oven, and everything.  The last time I baked, it was on a whim. Now it's not like me to be unprepared when I bake. But this time I was. I'd had one of those days and I needed to get my chocolate chips on. I didn't have the recipe but I was fairly certain I could recreate it from memory. I grabbed the butter and the eggs from the fridge, threw them into a mixing bowl, turned the mixer to speed 5, and made a crazy mess. I'd completely forgotten that I was suppos

// We humans are social creatures. We rely on each other for so many things. We form friendships, groups, communities. We gravitate towards people who share our opinions and world views. We look to our mentors and heroes for guidance. And we need this support to shape, confirm, and validate our realities.  You don't have to look far to find a bazillion quotes about virtually any subject imaginable. There's something extremely primal and comforting about a good quote that strikes a chord deep inside you. It can spark a fire, a passion. A transformational "AHA!" moment. It can even move you to...well...change.  Yes, we're still on that behemoth of subjects. And next week it's going to transition into some serious stuff. I'll expect you to come prepared, wearing your big girl pants.  But before we get all real up in here again, let me pamper your soul a little by offering up my 5 favorite quotes about change. I dare you to listen to this week's podcast and not feel supported, even a little motivated. [*Spoiler

How many times a day do you catch yourself saying, "I'm trying!" Cmon, you can tell me; what happens on the Get Out of Your Own Damn Way Podcast stays on the Get Out of Your Own Damn Way Podcast.   Not ready to 'fess up out loud? That's okay. I actually have a much deeper and more critical series of questions to ask you: When you say, "I'm trying!" what do you really mean? Where is your mindset? What message are you sending to the world? And more importantly, what message are you reinforcing deep within your own psyche? What habits and patterns are you repeating? And how is this affecting your process of change?   I'm sure you've figured out where I'm going with this. But in case you haven't, let me ask you to do something else. Think of a time you were with a child - maybe your own, maybe someone else's, maybe even YOU - and they were tasked with completing something ridiculously simple. Something virtually anyone could do. Probably something they'd already done, possibly even earlier that day. What did yo

(function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = "//forms.aweber.com/form/23/1208588523.js"; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-qvijahohr")); I need to write the copy for my latest podcast. But I'm too busy! Plus it's getting really late and I'm so tired. I have no one to help me. No one ever helps me. I gotta do everything myself. Do you realize how hard it is to come up with fresh, new ideas every week, write them down, proofread them, and edit them all by yourself? Then there's the recording and the video and more editing. Not to mention all the computery stuff I got do. Man, if only I had the money I could just hire someone to do all of this for me. Whaaaaaaaaaaaa!  Wow. Sorry about that. I don't usually whine about this stuff so publicly. I'm a little embarrassed. You'd think as a professional life coach I'd be above making so many excuses, would

(function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = "//forms.aweber.com/form/85/613778185.js"; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-jtjhwbiqd")); Think back to a time when you really wanted something. I mean lusted after it, visualized, fantasized to the point of complete distraction. Powerful goddess that you are, you did whatever it took to manifest your desire. Whether it was a new dress, a new car, a new job, or a relationship, the one thing I can tell you for certain is that it involved change. Congratulations! You've successfully managed change in your life before. And you can and will do it again. We've been digging deep into that process these past many week as my series on change has helped you to create healthier ways to approach your dreams. And if you've been diligent, you may have made a few new changes as a result. Perhaps you're over the

// See Jane. See Jane run. See Jane fall. See Jane cry. See Jane stand up, regroup, and do the same thing all over again. Jane is frustrated. Jane's in pain. Where is Jane running to, anyway? As it turns out, Jane is trying to get to Nordstrom's. They're having a BIG shoe sale. Jane needs new shoes. Jane's shoes are worn to the sole and falling apart. Maybe that's why Jane keeps falling down. Jane can't afford new shoes and yet she's planning to charge a pair of Louboutins. If she can ever make it there, that is. Jane has fallen victim to clever marketing...and the old paradigm of change. Unfortunately, Jane doesn't really exist or I'd put her in a pair of earbuds and have her listen to my latest podcast. STAT! You don't have to wait to be in excruciating pain to make a change. In fact, when your back is against the wall and you're drowning in desperation, you may find it extremely hard to make sound long-term decisions. You also aren't a complete slave to your cravings and impulses. Changes born solely

// Nearly two decades ago, I was thrust into the midst of monumental change. After putting my husband through grad school, I quit my job, we packed our car, put what wouldn't fit into storage, and drove across the country with our three year old to stay with our families while he looked for employment. Huge changes, right? But that was just the tip of the iceberg. You see, what I thought was the beginning of a new chapter in our lives was actually the end of my marriage. I was literally dumped on my mother's doorstep. The man I'd been with since my first year of college had engineered a plan to leave me with nothing...not my child, my belongings, or my self esteem. Don't get me wrong, I'm not confessing some great tragedy here. The truth is I'm grateful for how things unfolded because it was a pivotal time for me; it paved the way for the life I have now. But it also forced me to make some critical decisions about change. As overwhelmed as I was, as much as I needed to face and sort out, the only way I co

// When we were kids, my sister and I used to love watching animated Christmas movies. You know the ones, they ran every year. Frosty the Snowman, Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, and so many more. But there was one that featured a song that was crazy infectious; it applied to so many situations, was irrefutably basic and true, and just had to be sung. So...we sung it. And not just at Christmas. This song worked so well all year round that we'd sing it until we drove our parents batty. This song was - and is - a brilliant life lesson. What is this essential piece of wisdom that you simply cannot live a full life without? I'll give you a hint: it's all about change. See if you can guess. (Spoiler: I'll reveal it a little later.) This week we are taking a leap to the next phase of my change series. So far I've shattered the myths, revealed the truths, and prepared you to embrace the discomfort of change. If you're still with me, you're ready for the next step: Identifying what

(function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = "//forms.aweber.com/form/88/1129094988.js"; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-lj83i7rua")); Want to know an embarrassing little secret? Sometimes I wait a bit too long to change my sheets. This isn't a calculated process. I don't plan ahead. There are not 'pro vs. con' lists made, color charts, meetings by committee, etc. In fact, it's virtually unconscious. The payoff for changing vs. not changing my sheets is minuscule in the grand scheme of things...that is until not changing them becomes downright unbearable. So where is the tipping point? What is the trigger that moves us to either change or agonize over not changing? Simple. The key to all perspective change is discomfort. But before you switch to autopilot, tune me out, or close this email, read this one extremely important sentence: Discomfor

(function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = "//forms.aweber.com/form/74/1356799374.js"; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-8qhitpusv")); Sometimes there's great satisfaction in knowing exactly what's going to happen at every turn. Having a stocked refrigerator, the bills all covered, an orderly schedule. We often cling to the familiar. And If you're like most people, you strive to set up a routine that will achieve just that. Humans like consistency, security, predictability. And we can create it. But it's always temporary. Some would even say it's all an illusion. I'm not here to get all woo-woo on you. But after all, this is the next installment of my series on change. And those same annoying creatures who'll tell you that an orderly existence is an illusion will also be the first to quip that the only constant in this world is...change. So ind

// You just broke in your new couch, your Netflix queue is full, and you're about to reach level 5,000 on CandyCrush. Sure, things could be better but they could also be a whole lot worse. You, my friend, are in the comfort zone. Days go by with little to no real conflict. Weeks. Months. Even years. Why rock the boat? You're fine. Fine! Until you're not... There's an old saying that people will stay the same until not changing becomes more painful than choosing to change would be. And while it can be true, it's not always the case. Some people consciously choose to change...by choice and design. In fact, ALL people do so at times. I've done it. You've done it. And there's great reward, monumental empowerment, and a whole lot of confidence building mojo in taking the proactive route. Think about a time when you firmly and definitively decided to change. What happened? How did the world respond? What paths became clear? How did it impact your life? This week I'm launching a series of thermonuclear podcas

// You've been having a rough time. Breakup, loss of job, health scare, financial troubles. Maybe all of the above. You can't face this alone but you hate asking for help. You fear how people will react. Will they judge? Gossip? Turn their backs? Say the 'N' word? Or worse yet, all of the above? But you're exhausted. Emotional. Scattered. Overwhelmed. Probably all of the above! Wouldn't it be amazing if you had someone who knew exactly how to be there for you in this crisis? Someone who always said the right thing, brought the perfect comfort food, and never left your side? Someone who could help you trouble-shoot and find the best solutions one step at a time? I'm here to tell you that you already do. And she's been there all along. Guess what, buttercup, you are the one who can best do all of the above. Because you are the wind beneath your own wings! Now I'm not here to discount the support of others. You need to ask for and allow that into your life. But I want you to think about how you rush to he

// Think back to a time when one of your best friends was going through a really rough time. Maybe it was a breakup or she lost a job. Maybe a death or other profound loss. Heck it could have been an extraordinarily bad hair day. Whatever it was, she came to you for support. And you probably rolled your eyes, sighed dramatically, puffed up, and said, "What the hell is wrong with you? I told you this was going to happen. Why do you keep getting yourself into these situations? You brought it on yourself just like you always do and you deserve what you get. Now quit your whining, pull yourself together, get over it, and stop being such a hot mess!" No? So let me ask you this: When's the last time you said any of that nonsense to yourself? If you're like most people, You'd do anything for your best friend. You're her biggest fan and her strongest ally. You're always there for her no matter what. Right? So why aren't you treating yourself the same way? Let's face it, you are the only person who can logistical

// Have you ever totally lost it? You're having a bad day, a bad week...a bad everything... You reach a boiling point. Something triggers you and you finally just flip out. Maybe you kick and scream. Yell at the top of your lungs. Punch things. Throw stuff. You're hot and flushed. Your ears are ringing. You see red. And while this behavior may be frowned upon in polite society, as long as nobody gets hurt, you may find that once it's over, you secretly feel relieved. Maybe even a sense of liberated invigoration. What just happened? Well, my friend, the clinical explanation is this: you had a TANTRUM. tan·trum ˈtantrəm/ Noun. Described in various dictionaries as uncontrollable, an outburst, angry behavior, disobedience, violence, rage, frustration, etc... Does that sound dreadful? Who throws tantrums? Kids. Celebrities. Politicians. But what about you? Do you throw tantrums or do you feel guilty when you even let your anger show? Does losing your cool make you feel bad? Well I have only one thing to say

// Did you ever have to end a relationship with someone who was just no good for you? Maybe someone kind of abusive. Who kept you stuck. Lied. Cheated. Made you feel like total crap. A real bully. Unfortunately most of us have had to deal with at least one person like this along the way. It's not always easy to cut ties. Especially when it's someone you genuinely care for. But once you do, life inevitably becomes easier, happier, healthier. So what if I told you that you're still dealing with a bully? That's right, there's someone out to get you right now. Someone is trying to trip you up, keep you down, and steal your lunch money. I'd tell you to kick the crap out of her except for one thing: that someone is you. Of course you don't mean to do this to yourself. But let's face it, we are all our own worst critics. It's something we develop early in life and it becomes second nature. You may be so used to it that you've forgotten where you end and this critic begins. But make no mistake: that voice you he

Can I ask you a question? I want you to be brutally honest. Tell me the truth. Even if it's painful... What should you be doing right now? I'd tell you to really think about it but my educated guess is that you don't have to. I suspect you have a laundry list ready to go. In fact, there's a good chance laundry is on that list! You should be doing a million things. Am I right? What's more, there're probably a million other things you should have done instead of many of the things you actually did. You should figure out why that is. You should have figured it out years ago. You're probably a world-class expert in shoulding all over yourself. Wanna know what I think about this? It's a bunch of Bullshould! That's right; l said Bullshould. If this incredibly powerful word isn't yet a part of your everyday vocabulary, maybe it should be. Or more importantly, maybe it could be. Should is a dirty word. It traps you in a cycle of guilt and regret. It stinks. Stinks, I tells ya! And that's why I want you to start

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRYW7JE_XY8 Who do you trust? I don't mean superficially, casually, socially. I mean who would you want on that desert island with you if you were stranded? And a soccer ball doesn't count. Who would you trust in a crisis? With your twitter password? Who would you sign over control of your affairs to if it ever came to that? Most people have one or two people that come to mind immediately. And that's a really good feeling. But let me ask you this: Is that trust completely unconditional? And here's a tougher question: If you could clone yourself perfectly, right down to the last molecule, would you trust yourself in these situations? Trust is tricky. It's something you're told needs to be earned. Something that you know can be lost. It's something that takes conscious care and time to build...but too often one wrong move to send crumbling down. And like so many crucially important life skills, no one teaches you the fundamentals and language of trust. You're left to our own d

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBj0gbhvYY0 Remember the last time you were driving somewhere new? You may have been nervous because you weren't sure where you were going. Probably you had your navigation system helping out. But still, it can be a bit nerve wracking when you're on unsure footing. Maybe you missed a turn and had to re-route. Or possibly you swerved across a few lanes of traffic to get in the correct lane at the last second. But the fact that you're here now, reading this, tells me that it was not the end of anyone's world. So let's break it down: You had some decisions to make that day, right? First you decided to go somewhere you'd never been before. You had to decide how to get there. You had to choose the fastest route or the one that kept you off of major highways. You had to determine how early to leave, just in case you ran into any problems. And if one of my scenarios above occurred, you had to quickly shift gears and make split second course corrections. Can I ask you a question; d

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gC9DofV2G7M&feature=youtu.be Have you ever found yourself standing in the cereal aisle at the grocery store, staring at the dozens of boxes, pacing, agonizing, comparing nutritional information, calories, prices, absolutely paralyzed from making a simple, ultimately inconsequential decision? At the time, it can feel huge, even life altering. I mean you are committing to at least a few days worth of breakfast here. It could set the tone for your whole week. What if you pick the Raisin Bran and you wake up tomorrow totally not in the mood for dried grapes? Or maybe you go with GrapeNuts and you chip a tooth? Or you buy that fancy healthy stuff only to realize as you're eating it that you had forgotten that everyone else in the house but you hates that fancy healthy stuff? What if? Decisions. Decisions. Decisions. We easily make hundreds of these suckers every day. So why are some of them harder than others? You might be saying to yourself, "That's easy, Krylyn. Some of them a