Date/able Podcast

We've gotten so good at being intentional about dating, but in the process we've lost the magic. Today we're discussing how dating isn’t just about waiting for sparks or optimizing every move –it’s about finding the balance between the two. We dive into the tension between chasing serendipity and over-strategizing your love life, why leaning too far in either direction can leave you feeling stuck or unfulfilled, and how to see where you fall on the serendipity to strategy scale to create space for both spontaneity and purpose, Enjoy! ----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other po

What if one of the biggest mistakes in dating is also one of the most common—and hardest to admit? If you’re hoping someone will change or dating someone for their potential instead of who they are right now, you may already be setting the relationship up to fail. In this episode, we explore why we so often expect partners to change for love, how this usually leads to disappointment, and what it means to accept someone as they are – while still being honest about needs, preferences, and deal-breakers. Enjoy!-Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships

What if we were to tell you in 6 years your love life would like entirely different in the best way possible? We're so excited to bring you this episode where we check in with some of the members of the Dateable community – many that we got to know super well over the pandemic from our Sounding Board Community + Programs – to see what has changed in their love lives and the biggest shifts they made that helped them date differently. We discuss how to meet someone from the apps to a grocery store, why ending things with the 'wrong person' helped get to the right one, and the ways truly understanding yourself and your patterns helped unblock what was holding you back.Enjoy! ----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.

What if we told you there is one trait that predicts if a relationship will work out (or not)? And this absolutely should be something you're looking for when dating. If someone you're seeing doesn't demonstrate these qualities – don't just walk away but run! In this episode, we dig into what we wish we knew to look for in a partner earlier, that eventually we realized through our own situations and those of friends. We discuss why this one thing will make or break a relationship, how to see if it's a quality the person you're dating possesses and why so many of the red flags we focus on don't matter – but this one does. Enjoy!-Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateab

At our core, we’re not just wired for sex—we’re wired for deep connection with another human being. In this episode, we’re joined by Dr. Justin Garcia, leading sex researcher, evolutionary biologist, and Executive Director of the Kinsey Institute, who shares the science behind why humans are driven to bond, love, and seek intimacy. We explore how modern dating both supports and disrupts our natural instinct to pair bond, what choices like staying single or exploring nontraditional relationships mean in that context, and why even when connection feels hard to find it’s still fundamentally what we’re built for.To learn more about Dr. Justin Garcia follow him @drjustingarcia and go to https://kinseyinstitute.org/. Get his new book 'The Intimate Animal: The Science of Sex, Fidelity, and Why We Live & Die For Love' wherever books are sold.----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: h

Why do we place so much weight on being chosen and what does it actually get us? In this episode, we dig into how we’ve confused attention with real investment and chased validation instead of asking whether we felt genuinely valued. We reflect on the subtle ways performative dating shows up and how societal pressure keeps us focused on being picked and why the relationships worth having are built more so much more than simply being chosen. Enjoy!-Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or w

We all know our attachment styles greatly impact how we show up in dating and relationships, but what do we do if we have anxious or avoidant tendencies? We’re joined by attachment expert Thais Gibson, who shares how we can rewire our brains and nervous system to feel more secure. We discuss the ways that our childhood wounds directly correlate to our attachment styles, how to reprogram the subconscious beliefs that leak into our love lives, and why it's completely possible to reprogram your attachment style so you can date in a way that feels liberating.To learn more about Thais Gibson follow her @thepersonaldevelopmentschool and go to https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/. Get her new book 'The New Attachment Theory: Heal Every Relationship by Rewiring Your Brain and Nervous System' wherever books are sold.----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobe

If you’ve ever questioned whether a relationship is “right” you’re not alone. In this episode, we unpack how our understanding of healthy relationships has evolved over time, and why the ones that actually last often feel steady and grounding rather than dramatic or intense. We reflect on past experiences where chemistry and excitement were mistaken for compatibility, and how that mindset kept us stuck in patterns that didn’t truly serve us. Enjoy!-Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or

In a world full of opinions, algorithms, and endless advice, learning to trust yourself has never been harder—or more important. In this episode, we unpack how modern dating and decision-making have become clouded by external noise, from social media to AI, and why reconnecting with your intuition is key to clarity and confidence in dating. We discuss the risks of crowdsourcing every decision, how to build a “self-trust library” through small, consistent actions, and why regaining self-trust will help you massively reduce the time spent on dating to allow you to focus on the good parts!----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for

If you’re like 46% of our audience, you may be afraid of choosing the wrong partner—and that fear can keep you stuck overthinking every decision or holding onto something that doesn’t feel right. In this episode, we share why the real mistake isn’t picking the wrong person—it’s staying too long when it’s not working. We discuss what we wish we could tell our younger selves to relinquish this fear and actually get into healthy relationships (and leave ones that are draining our time, energy, and mental health!) Enjoy! -Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Rel

Whether you’ve questioned if someone in your life might be a narcissist or just want to better understand toxic relationship patterns, we’re breaking down what narcissism really looks like and how to protect yourself. We’re joined by Dr. Alina Kastner, who shares why these relationships are so detrimental and how to recognize the warning signs to gtfo of these unhealthy dynamics. We're discussing what really defines define narcissistic abuse, why narcissists often target the people you'd least expect, and how to heal from this type of relationship if you were to find yourself in this situation.TW: This episode talks about psychological abuse and touches on sexual and physical abuse.To learn more about Dr. Alina Kastner follow her @dr.alinakastne and go to https://www.alinakastner.com/en. Get her new book 'Break Up With Narcissism: How to Break Free and Stay Free – the 4-step Plan For Surviving Narcissistic Abuse' wherever books are sold.----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedatea

Have you ever wasted time trying to decode people who are giving mixed signals? If you've spent hours re-reading messages, overanalyzing tone and holding onto potential, this one is for you. Or if you're just starting to date in your 20s and want to avoid all this time wasted, this something you need to hear right now. We're sharing what we learned the hard way so you don't have to experience it too when it comes to mixed signals. Enjoy!-Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify

Have you ever had a relationship where you thought "this is it" only for it to crumble right before your eyes? Add in if there was any infidelity or other betrayals and ooph – no wonder it's hard to get back into dating and trust again. We're talking to Greg about what he's discovered 3 years post-divorce about dating again, navigating the apps, and healing through it all. We discuss what it means to date with your values at the forefront even after betrayal, ways to really confront the trauma so it doesn't follow you into the next relationship, and how to rebuild trust in yourself (and others) so you can ultimately find happiness again.TW: While overall this conversation is very positive, there are mentions of infidelity and suicidal thoughts at the beginning. ----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Ge

If you find yourself getting dates but they never turn into relationships, you may be over-indexiing "dating skills" and undervaluing "relating" ones. In this episode, Julie breaks down the difference between dating skills (the spark) and relating skills (the glue), and why most people obsess over chemistry but ignore the skills that actually build connection. If you’re cycling through almost-relationships, or wondering why nothing sticks, this episode will show you how to refocus your attention to skills that actually are more natural to begin with! Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also l

Whether you've tried matchmaking yourself or just learned about it from TV, we're giving you a behind the scenes look into the art of the setup and what it truly means to have success when using a matchmaker. We're chatting with Jaydi Samuels Kuba, a Hollywood matchmaker, about all the challenges and benefits of matchmaking – and how to make it work for you. We discuss what she's learned from years of observing dates (you'd be surprised at the nervous dating habits that come up!), how to understand client preferences vs dealbreakers to bring them the best match, and the ways she's helped so many clients (including herself!) have their last first date.To learn more about Jaydi follow her @matchmadeinhollywood and go to https://www.ljmatchmaking.com/. Get her new book 'Your Last First Date: Secrets from a Hollywood Matchmaker' wherever books are sold.----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding

Situationships always have a villain—but it might not be who you think. In this episode, Yue challenges the narrative that the non-committal partner is the bad guy, especially if they have been honest about what they can offer. Inspired by the short film Making Space, she explores how we often ignore clear signals, cling to potential, and hope ambiguity will turn into commitment. Yue unpacks the difference between accepting reality and chasing possibility—and why taking responsibility for your choices is the most empowering move you can make. Enjoy!Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other

Why do some relationships thrive while others seem to fall apart? The answer isn't luck; it's psychology. Join us as we dive into the next phase of long-term committed relationships and the 6 pillars we believe are truly the foundation of a partnership. We're discussing how to navigate the recurring cycles of a relationship fueled by both of your individual patterns and histories, why it's not just communication – but repair – that's the glue to a relationship, and ways to build better habits to strengthen your relationship (or prepare you for when you inevitably enter one in the near future!) Enjoy! If you liked this, subscribe to other podcast too 'The Psychology of Relationships' on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.----Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized

In this episode, Julie is breaking down the biggest change she made when dating the last time around before meeting her now-husband: seeking clarity. If you’ve ever overanalyzed a text, questioned where you stand, or stayed because “maybe it’ll become clear,” this conversation will shift how you approach dating. Julie breaks down why directly asking for what you need isn’t aggressive — it’s self-respect — and how getting real answers (even the uncomfortable ones) is the fastest path to healthier love.--Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateableFollow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and E

Have you ever thought you knew why dating was so hard only for your best friend to have a completely different perspective of what's keeping you single? We're joined by two lifelong besties Sean & Ned to hear Sean's challenges of dating in a highly ambitious city like San Francisco where the ratios skew more men to women. And of course the perspective of Ned from his experiences with Sean and his own revelations before finding the partner of his dreams three years ago. We're discussing the difference of being picky vs. settling, what's really going on to cause you to pick the partners you do, and how to let go of the stories that aren't serving you (and discover the root causes of where they may be coming from). Enjoy!Check out Ned's Youtube at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFjV78K8uZIVToqL9c9_ggwTake the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobeda

Emotional connection is powerful—but is it enough? In this episode, Yue questions the idea that love can truly be “blind" but beyond just being physically attracted, and more about the general ease and connection you share in a physical space. Drawing from the TV show Love Is Blind (which she has gotten hooked this season), a recent experience with a friend of hers, and her own time in a"virtual" relationship before she finally met up with the guy in San Francisco, she explores why physical chemistry and nonverbal cues matter more than we admit. This is another reason to take the leap and go meet in person as soon as possible (even if the connection starts online). Enjoy!Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.c