Clarity On Fire

A year ago, on my birthday, I did something I’m prouder of than almost anything I’ve ever done: I published my own solo podcast!   Forever Alone: One introverted millennial’s half-agonizing, half-hopeful journey through singledom.   It’s like a memoir, in audio form. But people tell me it feels less like non-fiction and more like listening to a novel. Whether you’re single or not, it’ll resonate with you if you’re someone who’s been hoping for something for a long time that you haven’t gotten (and if your heart and spirit are a little bruised from the effort of trying).   So, in honor of Forever Alone’s one-year anniversary, I’m letting Kristen interview me again (we did one last year, too!) about everything that’s happened since then. And oh boy … is it a doozy.   We got into…   What happened after I left off at the end of Chapter 7, when I went to the UK (in search of a Scottish husband), My house flooding, moving back in with my parents, and deciding to get on Bumble for the first time, How I managed to s

Welcome to another episode of Dear Krachel, our monthly advice segment where we answer listener questions about life, career, relationships, existential angst, and anything that helps you become a more whole, fulfilled version of yourself.   This month we answered questions from:   Bummed Entrepreneur, who worked her buns off for years to build a successful business. She has a great business partner, a staff, and more growth than she expected—and she’s “miserably numb.” She woke up one day and just … didn’t care, and nothing (not a vacation, not therapy) is changing how she feels. Why is she so bummed after getting everything she asked for?   Angelica, who worked hard (both on herself as a person, and on her career) to land a true dream job that she LOVES. But she finds herself bumping up against a fear that won’t go away—that maybe it’s not possible to have both a dream career AND a dream relationship. How can she let go of the idea that she can’t have both?   A Quitter with Qualms, who’s super disengag

A lot of you are people pleasers, and you know it. You cycle through the greatest hits every day!

There’s not much worse than wanting your life and relationships to change — to deeply thrive — and not seeing or understanding why you can’t seem to get there.   One of the silent causes behind SO many relationship woes (romantic, of course, but ALL of them, including the ones you have at work and with work) is your attachment style.   Never heard of it? Well, you need to! And we happen to have the person to teach you all about it.    On this month’s interview with an expert, we talked to therapist Shira Myrow about the nuances of attachment. Listen in as we explore…   What exactly attachment is, and how to tell if your style is healthy or unhealthy, Examples of how to identify unhealthy attachment in your life and relationships, Ways to regulate and overcome the unhealthy patterns that keep you stuck, Some surprising facts about how the brain works that had us reeling!    Come leave a comment after you’ve listened to share how Shira’s take on attachment resonated with you!   MORE ABOUT SHIRA   Shira is a m

Are you a wee bit tired? Burned out? Exhausted to your core? Weary to the marrow of your being?  

If you haven’t been in the Clarity-verse (it’s a thing, I’ve decided) for a while, you might have missed the fact that one year ago Kristen got a full-time job.   Not because she desperately needed one. Or because Krachel was on the verge of a breakup (going strong, thanks!).    It was because she wasn’t walking her talk.   Ironically, one of the people who created the Passion Profile Quiz was struggling because, go figure, she wasn’t working like a Thriver. They say you teach what you most need to learn!   So, on the year anniversary of Kristen getting a full-time job, I got the inside scoop about how it’s going. We got into…   How she knew this job was going to be able to meet her needs, before she got hired. What it’s been like to balance a job with coaching and running a business. How her energy levels have totally shifted in the last year. How she’s dealt with overwhelm when it’s come up. Why making a decision that seemingly defies logic might land you with more time and energy than you thought possible

Welcome to another episode of Dear Krachel, our monthly advice segment where we answer listener questions about life, career, relationships, existential angst, and anything that helps you become a more whole, fulfilled version of yourself.   This month we answered questions from:   Giamhi, a senior in high school whose parents are pushing her to go into a field like engineering or teaching. She doesn’t know what she wants — but she knows she doesn’t want to do that. How do you make a career choice when you’re feeling pressured to do something that will make other people happy? Summer, who asked us, “What do I do when I’m burned out and not sure if ANY job will reignite my passion?” Less than Optimistic, who was excited to pursue a career in a very specific field, but after applying to over 100 jobs and never getting anything, moved on to something totally different. After a decade, he still has dreams of pursuing his original interest … but obviously he’s not hopeful. How can you tell if something is a pipe

Honing your intuition is one of the most important parts of getting clear on who you are, what you want, and where you’re headed. Without it, you’re like a GPS with bad reception — you’re not going to get very clear guidance, and you may end up driving in circles.   But that takes time and practice, so sometimes it’s nice to piggyback off of another GPS you can trust, even if it’s just long enough to check your directions.    In that spirit, we’re back with another Message from the Universe episode for you! Tune in if you need a little clarity, guidance, or just a fun pick-me-up.    Today we pulled a few cards from The Enchanted Map deck by Colette Baron-Reid. One or all has a message for you — come find out what it is!    We also started out this episode with some fun stories we’ve heard lately from clients about how the Universe showed up for them. If you’ve got a good one to share, we’d love to hear (and maybe share it in a future Message from the Universe episode)! Email us at contact@clarityonfire.com, s

Ever seen that meme of a circle with text in it that says “your comfort zone,” and then a little dot way outside the circle that says, “where the magic happens?”   Ugh, makes us want to roll our eyes. Because it’s TRUE. And we wish it weren’t!   But alas, magic does happen when you’re willing to get uncomfortable. Except it’s not easy at ALL to get out of your comfort zone. Especially if you want to get out and stay out.   So, in this month’s brand-new Side Chat, we’re diving into how to successfully exit your comfort zone. We talked about …   An interesting way to train your body/nervous system to be OK with emotional discomfort. How to know whether you should get out of your comfort zone — what if it’s just not worth it? A little tough love about ways you might be sneakily sidestepping hard things.  And a simple way to figure out the first step you should take, so that you don’t end up crashing and burning.   Leave a comment after you’ve listened to share how this inspired you to get out of your comfort z

For those of you who don’t know (or maybe forgot, since it’s been so long), Rachel and I used to write a new blog post every single week for YEARS. In fact, our writing was what we were most known for in the early years of Clarity on Fire.  All of our old blogs are still available on our site (check out our full library). But many of those old posts haven’t seen the light of day in a while, even though they’re just as relevant today as they were when we first wrote them.  So today, I’m highlighting one of those old posts! This is a concept I still share with my clients when they’re struggling with burnout. Listen in as I read you the blog, or read it in full on our site. ------------- I’m sitting here on a Friday afternoon, and I have a running mental list of everything I could or should be doing right now. I should be responding to emails, or going to the gym, or running errands, or planning dinner, and on and on. But it’s Friday afternoon, and I’m just not feelin’ any of it. All I want to do is sit outside

Welcome to another episode of Dear Krachel, our monthly advice segment where we answer listener questions about life, career, relationships, existential angst, and anything that helps you become a more whole, fulfilled version of yourself.   This month we answered questions from:   Andrea, an artist who’s been working in her field for 4 years. She’s struggling to enjoy her job because her work isn’t as good as other, more senior artists. Does she need to be good at her job to enjoy it? Or is the lack of enjoyment a sign she’s on the wrong path? Bailey, who’s made an admirable effort to “stop going to the hardware store for milk”—AKA, she’s not trying to get emotional support from people who can’t meet her needs. But where CAN she go to get the support she craves, when there’s nothing but proverbial hardware stores everywhere? Ready to Rebel, a Firestarter/Thriver combo who’s struggling to balance her conflicting Passion Profiles. She deeply craves freedom BUT has a crippling fear of losing stability. How can

I recently heard Sam Laura Brown get interviewed on a podcast I occasionally listen to, and I immediately had three visceral reactions:   This woman deeply understands what’s behind perfectionism and talks about it in a way I’ve never heard before.  I really want our listeners to hear her wisdom, because I know so many of them will relate.  Uh oh, I think I might be more of a perfectionist than I thought…

In the 17-or-so years that I’ve been working, I’ve quit a LOT of jobs. I could probably do an Ariana Grande-style 7 rings musical rendition of all the jobs I’ve quit … but I’ll spare you.    (Though if you did want a list, you could just go back and listen to us recount all the (embarrassing) things we’ve quit on the podcast.)   From the Old Navy store at the outlet mall, to nannying, to investment firms, to law firms — I’ve quit ‘em all.    The longest I ever had any job was about a year-and-a-half — hardly long enough to achieve anything, but certainly long enough to know I hated it!     So, how did someone practically allergic to employment end up doing a job (I’m talking about coaching, obviously) for 10 years without quitting?   That’s what Kristen and I are diving into in a brand-new, super in-depth Side Chat! Listen in as we talk about:   Learning the hard way what a job is, and isn’t, meant to do for you  How your enjoyment of a job can magically change, even if you hated it before, when your mindset

Ever been so burnt out that you were ready to up and quit your job with no plan?   We’ve been there — and actually done it … more than once.

Welcome to another episode of Dear Krachel, our monthly advice segment where we answer listener questions about life, career, relationships, existential angst, and anything that helps you become a more whole, fulfilled version of yourself.   This month we answered questions from:   Tiffanny, a Thriver (on the Passion Profile Quiz) who works full-time and has spent the last 2 years trying to get a business going on the side. She’s changed directions multiple times, spent countless hours on webinars, classes, and consults, but can’t seem to stay on course and make something work. Could this be an indicator that entrepreneurship isn’t for her? Is she chasing something she wants, that doesn’t want her? Tina, who’s wondering how people who struggle with their mental health navigate finding their passion and having a fulfilling career. Even if they get what they want, what if their brain doesn’t allow them to enjoy it? Bea, who’s eyes have recently opened to just how many of her beliefs were influenced by her cult

Calling all fellow bookworms, library nerds, and general lovers of literature — it’s time for another book club episode of the podcast!    Whenever there are five Fridays in a month, we devote the extra Friday to a book that we can’t get enough of. In this episode we’re diving into Atlas of the Heart by the one and only Brené Brown.   You’re going to love this book, and this conversation, if you value emotional intelligence and want to learn how to help yourself — and everyone around you — become more fluent at expressing thoughts and feelings.   Listen in as we dive into…   The eyebrow-raising stats about just how emotionally unaware most people are. Why things like rejection and failure feel so uncomfortable, and how to lessen the pain. How choosing the right words to describe how you feel actually changes those feelings. The difference between stress and overwhelm, and how to cure them. New ways of seeing common experiences like jealousy, envy, resentment, hope, and belonging that will totally change your

Well, we totally were not intending on doing another message from the Universe episode so soon after our last one, but the expert guest we have for you couldn’t make it work until next month, so here we are. Apparently the Universe really wanted to talk to all of us!   So, listen in as we find out what was so important it couldn’t wait another month. ;)   Today we pulled a few cards from The Enchanted Map deck by Colette Baron-Reid. One or all has a message for you — come find out what it is!    Check out the cards and written descriptions here. And after you listen, leave a comment to share how this one spoke to you!   WANT TO WORK WITH US 1:1?   There comes a point where you’re ready to stop hoping things will change and start knowing they will. You’re probably very clear about what you don’t want out of your life and career, but know you need to dive a whole lot deeper into what you do want. You might be a little nervous about the prospect of massive change … but at this point in your life, you deeply und

In the past few weeks multiple clients have come to us with the same question (so you know it’s time to talk about it on the podcast):   I’m afraid I can’t get what I want because I don’t know enough yet. How clear do I REALLY need to be?   So, in this month’s brand-new Side Chat we’re demystifying the hazy line between what counts as “clear enough” and what doesn’t. Listen in as we talk about…   The (incorrect) assumptions you’ve made about what you believe you must know in order to get what you want—a new job, a relationship, or whatever else! The things you definitely don’t need to know (yet … or maybe ever) The 3 things you definitely do need to know if you want hope of finding direction or getting anything that will make you happy   Leave a comment after you’ve listened to share how this episode resonated with you!   PSST … WANT TO WORK WITH US?   A little secret just for people like you, who pay close attention. ;)   In a few weeks we’re going to be relaunching our site, raising our coaching rates, an

Full disclosure: Ever since my client Terece first told me she was planning to write a book (a lifelong dream of hers), I knew I’d eventually want to bring her back on the podcast to talk about it.    I’ve had the joy of seeing Terece’s massive transformation over the last few years from a self-doubting people-pleaser (see my original interview with her on ditching perfectionism) to someone who’s confident in who she is and is committed to expressing herself authentically.    Because of that, I knew her book-writing journey would be profound.    Now that she’s completed her book and is in the final stages of editing and promoting it (make sure to check out her pre-sale campaign!), she’s back to share just how intense, vulnerable, emotional, and ultimately satisfying it’s been to turn her vision into a reality.   Listen in to hear Terece and I talk about…   How she’d ignored her dream for so long that she actually forgot about it … and what she did to bring it back to life. The fears that have come up along t

Welcome to another episode of Dear Krachel, our monthly advice segment where we answer listener questions about life, career, relationships, existential angst, and anything that helps you become a more whole, fulfilled version of yourself.   This month we answered questions from:   Concerned Daughter, who has a very supportive mom—so supportive, in fact, that she tells her kids she doesn’t need a fulfilling career, even though she’s not content with the job she has. Making her kids happy is enough! Concerned Daughter isn’t convinced … she thinks her mom might not be owning her full desires. Should she push her mom to pursue what she really deserves? Maggie, who started a new job about a year ago and received a lot of validation right off the bat—praise from her boss, an “employee of the month award,” and her work getting shown off in meetings. Now, the parade of positive feedback has all but died out, and she’s worried her boss isn’t pleased with her work. Should she be concerned that the external validation