How To Stop Wanting Him Back

Today's episode is inspired by one of Claire's clients who reconnected with an ex (not part of her coaching plan!) and ultimately decided that overall she just thinks she has a "bad mindset." Much to the clients' surprise on the group call, Claire chimed in with, "Yeah ME TOO!" In this episode you'll discover how your negative mindset, whether it's about your love-life or something else, doesn't have to be a problem... it's NOT CONSISTENTLY DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT, that's the problem, and Claire shares what you can actively do to switch out of it... even when the inevitable disruptions and curveballs come your way.

You want love, and you believe you're DOING your part...You're swiping, dating, working on yourself, etc.Maybe you ARE... But what would it look like to do 10 TIMES the part that you're already doing, in order to find your person? NOT from a pressury, rushed, energy, but from curious, motivated and well... "energized" energy!This episode was inspired by a book Claire is reading by Grant Cardone, called the 10 X Rule. How can you not only 10X your effort into finding true love, but 10X the idea of the person you're looking for, so that you stop settling for less than what you want and deserve?Referenced EpisodesInward and OnwardMy Heartbreak Story

It's not kindness, communication, or respect... although those are pretty good hallmarks of a relationship too! Claire reveals what she thinks makes Larry and her work so well together, which doesn't involve just the two of them... Curious? Then check out this freeing and fun episode, where Claire definitely has a laugh at her own expense, as well as Larry's.Referenced episodes My Heartbreak Story.Inward and Onward

In today's episode, Claire addresses the woman's desire to be pursued, specifically in heteronormative relationships. Claire herself identifies as a "traditional feminist," who appreciates the man pursuing the woman when it comes to asking her out, initiating contact, and yes, even paying for the first couple of dates, while still being all about female empowerment, independence and equality. HOWEVER, there were lots of ways Claire showed up at the beginning stages of her relationship with Larry that many would perceive as non-traditional pursuing between the man and woman, but she breaks down why it didn't feel like she was pursuing him.  If you are hesitant to put yourself out there on the apps, or even get out there in the world with the intention of "you never know who you're gonna meet... more of a chance being out and about, than at home behind closed doors!," this episode is for you! Episode references:Who Should Pay On The First Date?Why It IS and Isn't About Your Love-LifeDating App SmackdownThree-pa

Big TRIGGER WARNING for today's episode, as Claire understands that physical appearance-- especially for women-- can tend to be an extremely sensitive issue.And yet, it's an issue that she really wanted to address in today's episode, because what we look like, as well as what we want our ideal person to look like or NOT look like, often comes into play in our dating lives.Claire's intention for this episode is to offer you a shift in perspective about the importance and pressure surrounding the issue of looks when it comes to finding your person, as well as your person finding you, but also shares some of her own truths and honest opinions regarding physical attraction, on your search for love.Enjoy!

If you let the story, "I'm just not lucky in love" roll off your tongue, this episode is for you, because YES-- it IS just a story that you get to change instead of perpetuate as your truth! Claire helps you see how your love-life isn't about luck-- it's about belief AND the meaning you're making out of what's unfolded in your past romantic relationships. Enjoy!

If you think your attraction to unavailable men is super confusing because you believe you're super available, this episode is for you.Get ready to hunker down and eat a slice of humble pie for this episode.Claire truly believes that like attracts like, NO MATTER WHAT, and if you're willing to look at how YOU might have something to do with your continued pattern of attracting unavailable men-- despite how much healing work you've done on yourself-- get cozy and take a listen! www.theurbanandthemystic.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20www.winnowskincare.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20

Claire speaks so much about how easy it is to settle for crumbs, but in this episode, she talks about common ways women automatically want to write someone off without deeply considering WHY they're writing that person off...They're being rigid for reasons that usually have to do with past experiences, or observing someone else in a particular circumstance that makes you believe that someone who wasn't rich enough wouldn't work well for you either. (using money just as an example).Today's episode is NOT intended for you to agree with bending the way Claire has bent for her own relationship that's right for her, but it is an invitation for you to deeply investigate WHY you're willing or not willing to give someone a chance, based on automatic beliefs you have about that person, or an idea that you need the relationship and/or him to look and be a certain way.It just might break your brain open to be that much more open to who you're ideal guy is... that has nothing to do with his age, relationship history, or

Claire is bringing you a dating app smackdown on today's episode! Look, this isn't to say that your person is definitely on the apps, but the apps ARE the most mainstream way to date these days, and Claire is here to say that just because you've had some brutal experiences or "no luck" with the apps so far, doesn't mean you should throw in the towel when it comes to the apps.If you are ready to take the dating app smackdown, as well as understand how you have so much more power than you realize when it comes to the dating apps, this episode is for you! www.theurbanandthemystic.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20www.winnowskincare.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20 Other episodes mentioned: #211 "I Don't Want To Be Alone Anymore"

In today's episode, Claire share's about a client's resistance to doing the work outside of their calls together (very normal!) but what was uncovered underneath the resistance broke open a whole new way for her client to approach her finding-love journey.This is Claire's favorite aspect of the coaching work: When you don't even realize the blocked thought that's preventing you from where you want to go, because you don't even recognize the bad vibes this thought is having on your finding-love journey.If you are single and so frustrated on your search for love, this episode is for you.Episode references:Dating "Correctly" www.theurbanandthemystic.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20www.winnowskincare.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20

This episode was inspired by two of Claire's clients who she saw were missing the point of the self-love work... Sure, we want to be the best versions of ourselves when we meet the one, but this self-love journey isn't ONLY so we can get something like romantic love out of it, and when we unconsciously lose sight of this, that's when things can feel like they're going awry. Whether or not you think you've got the self-love work down, and/or you are finding yourself still miserable, or at the very least are struggling with being single, this episode is for you. Episodes referenced: 12 Years Since Rockbottom episodeWhen The Work Isn't Working 2.0 www.theurbanandthemystic.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20www.winnowskincare.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20

Today's episode was inspired by a basketball coach Claire recently observed, who talked about why the ball wasn't going into the basket. It was because the players were shooting to make the shot-- not focusing on shooting the ball correctly.This got Claire thinking about how people do this with dating: They date to land a man. They don't date with intentionality, awareness, clarity and joy with the PROCESS of finding the man!Two very different things, with the latter being CRUCIAL!Claire breaks down 11 examples of what dating "correctly" looks like, in this episode... You're gonna wanna take notes on this one! www.theurbanandthemystic.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20www.winnowskincare.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20 Episodes Claire references:When The Work Isn't Working 2.0Dating With Dignity Vs. Your EgoApproaching Dating the Right WayInward and Onward

Today's episode invites you to specifically LOVE the way you're showing up when it comes to your search for the one, even when someone you're into ends up really disappointing you. Claire is selling dignity over your ego in this episode, and offers 7 examples of how a woman can show up with dignity in her dating life. She also shares how choosing dignity comes up for her in her business, instead of choosing her ego, because she truly believes that how you are in one area of your life is how you are in ALL areas, and when you're consistently showing up differently to attract different, you absolutely eventually will! Other episodes Claire references: 12 Years Since RockbottomWhen the Work Isn't Working 2.0www.theurbanandthemystic.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20www.winnowskincare.com 20% off with code : HeartbreakCoach20

Claire was inspired to do this episode because she is tired of seeing so-called experts give dangerous advice that could ultimately sabotage you and/or your relationship or potential relationship. Guidelines and rules are important-- especially when you've been abandoning yourself when it comes to your love-life for so long... But when you're too rigid and are automatically only looking at your circumstance narrow-mindedly because of something some self-described expert says is right or wrong, you could very easily miss the lesson AND potentially, a really wonderful partnership. 

Although Claire did an episode two years ago on her 40th birthday, reflecting on 10 years since her rockbottom relationship and all that she has learned, she decided to do another one only two years later as she celebrates 42, because there are more big life lessons she has processed since then, now that she is more "full swing" into her ideal relationship.Whether you're heartbroken or single and looking for love, there are great reminders in here, that she wished she'd understood and factored in so that she could have given herself and others more grace along the way. Enjoy!

How is it true that the work IS working, when you've been putting in the work and you're NOT seeing the results??Claire was inspired to record a new and improved episode on this topic, due to a personal experience of herself guessing if the work was working in a particular area in her own life, and a client was questioning the same thing regarding her dating life.TRIGGER WARNING: This episode touches on body image/weight issues as well as Claire's personal journey with alcohol, in case these are topics you do not want to listen to for your own personal reasons.

In the second of this three-part series, holistic health expert, Jamie Mckeown, guests again and breaks down more of the science when it comes to the effects alcohol can have on your broken heart, in a light-hearted, entertaining, and non-preachy manner!  If you are someone who tends to lean on alcohol in general, or even more so when you're nursing a broken heart, don't be afraid to listen! This is not about preaching on what's right or wrong, or good or bad.  The purpose of this three-part series is to educate you, and perhaps remind you of some of the facts you probably already know but would be helpful to hear again, because you're wanting to have a better handle on your relationship with alcohol, whether heartbroken or not! Stay tuned for next week's episode, discussing navigating alcohol while dating in search of the one! Follow Jamie at @jamiesguide on Instagram. 

In the second of this three-part series, holistic health expert, Jamie Mckeown, guests again and breaks down more of the science when it comes to the effects alcohol can have on your broken heart, in a light-hearted, entertaining, and non-preachy manner!  If you are someone who tends to lean on alcohol in general, or even more so when you're nursing a broken heart, don't be afraid to listen! This is not about preaching on what's right or wrong, or good or bad.  The purpose of this three-part series is to educate you, and perhaps remind you of some of the facts you probably already know but would be helpful to hear again, because you're wanting to have a better handle on your relationship with alcohol, whether heartbroken or not! Stay tuned for next week's episode, discussing navigating alcohol while dating in search of the one! Follow Jamie at @jamiesguide on Instagram. 

Claire brings back her bestie and health expert, Jamie Mckeowen, to discuss a topic she continues to explore in her own life: ALCOHOL.This episode is the first of a three-part series where Claire and Jamie share about their own histories and current relationships with alcohol, and why it's an important topic for women's health that needs to be consistently revisited, because it's easy to forget about the harmful effects alcohol can have in large quantities and/or on a consistent basis. This first episode sets you up for the three-part series to explore your own relationship with alcohol, before Claire and Jamie dive into an episode specifically about heartbreak and alcohol, as well as dating and alcohol in the coming weeks.  As always, the purpose of this show is to invite important conversations and deep inquiry if you too might be re-evaluating alcohol, or perhaps it's sugar, gluten, or some other substance in your life, that you know you'd benefit from consuming less of. This show is not for the purpose of

Claire takes a fun spin on the phrase, "Onwards and Upwards" in this episode, as she shares about her challenging year in 2022, and how she is choosing to show up differently for 2023.It's a tricky thing to balance what experts say we all "should" do when it comes to creating goals and making big life and business decisions.In today's episode, Claire talks about the importance of listening to your gut above anything else, even when it might not make logical sense to those around you who may know better based on their experience and level of expertise, regarding the specific decisions you're making.Not everything is a cookie cutter, one-size-fits-all process for everyone-- including Claire's processes of healing your heart and finding love! Pause, reglect, go inward (Claire gets into what that looks like) and decide for YOU what the right, aligned next steps and decisions are.References: Polling Your Audience episode