Vivian Beaumont And Vivian Beaumont



Two octagenarian philanthropist widows talk about themselves


  • Vivian Beaumont 8: Space Plan


    Drugs that knocked Vivian out, Sleep Number Adjustable Bed cured her problem, mistaken for homelessman, blasting the homeless into space, Doctor Dave, You can't kick a homeless person in space, two-year space suit, Jesus? Tom Selleck? Bill Paxton?, Vivian brings Vivian a special guest for an interview and exits through the pressure chamber doors, Vivian convinces the homeless man Vivian's homeless space plan is a good idea, homeless man giving pills to Vivian and raping her, he reveals his true identity, Vivian takes action against the doctor, Vivian returns through the pressure chamber doors, Vivian's vulva is ripped to shreds, Esmerelda and the song by Heart, Betty impaled herself onto a mailbox stick, Vivian squeezed Betty's tube and killed Mary, Vivian and Vivian mopped up blood with their hair during the war, Vivian does not get political, Is Vivian even American?, Proud to be an American musical tribute

  • Vivian Beaumont 7: Katherine Hepburn

    15/03/2007 Show Notes passive aggressive, Guinness Book of Hospice Records, below the counter at McDonalds, stable boy, octopus, cheetah, Katherine Hepurn, flanged, grandson, recording, song, true love, Vivian's eyes are opened, return of the candlestick, Vivian's admission, Polaroid and Kinkos,

  • Vivian Beaumont 6: Snuff Podcast


    Vivian can't remember if she has Alzheimers, Hospice is a group of psychics who know when you're going to die, They bent her spoons, bikinis with feces rubbed on them from Marhsalls, more hot pies, gay children shop at Marshalls, many gay people with aids come back from hospice, snuff podcast, Vivian is a hospice worker who makes snuff films of her patients., heavy people are poorer according to the New York Times, Vivian realizes she is a hospice worker. Both Vivian and Vivian are going to die on the podcast, double snuff podcast, The Lohan clan appear on the radio and reveal that Lindsay is in AA (American Airlines Anonymous), Sickle Cell disease creator dies in Harlem, Jew Time, Kramer, Gayle King claims that she and Oprah (two white lesbians) use the "n" word in private company

  • Vivian Beaumont 5: Slap


    Prepare the parade. Set up the banners. The ladies have returned! Thirty minutes of absolute family classiness.

  • Vivian Beaumont 4: Zebra Farm


    myspace, weare not the same person, deaf help costs less, servants are idiots, paperwork and pills, National Conservation Agency, Zebra Farm, 22 Mexicans flying to Africa, scissors make a bikini, Mother died on tracks, do not live like the common folk or you will die, emeralds in the newspaper, pills vs servants, Viv does not have children, a special guest for next week, a llama is not a farm animal, Hamstring the pot bellied pig, do not say needless to say, black people are not pots, letters to us, Ponce vs Poonce the cat

  • Vivian Beaumont 3: Pool Party


    Today's comedy is based strictly between the legs, melon bikini, Jewish doctors, Veterinarion Beaumont, Vivian recounts her days as a heavy hooofer, napkins keep you cool, paper teeth, Vivian catches Vivian's gay husband at Vivian's pool and he dies, 2 feet of bosom, Third bosom, One was gay, A surprise, African trip, Gesticulating babies, Judy Garland died of AIDS, Mulatto Grave and Funeral Parlor, Haiku Poem by Vivian, Vivian's secret affair with Andy Warhol

  • Vivian Beaumont 2: Robert Redford


    Guessing game, broach, French sales girls, fake handbag, Robert Redford, babies go to the maid, one person Titanic, Anuses, Hippies

  • Vivian Beaumont 1: Mulatto Melting Pot


    plastic knees, ball of yarn in your macaroni, jockey balls, vicarious pregnancy, Tootles killed by Whiskers, One you go brown...., guacamole, bloog, bubble bath, testosterone pills, bull intricacies, addicted to metaphore, Rhymes and Jazz, large bosoms, republicans, babies out of lips, Rodriguez, massaged by a black man