Drinks With A Minister Podcast

This episode’s drinks: Four Sigmatic Mushroom Coffee Topics we covered: How self-improvement brought Shawn into the wedding industry How marriage coaching can help even (especially?) good marriages Why choosing a good officiant is so important for your wedding day Why we love personal vows What is next for Young, Hip, & Married Links to the awesome things and people mentioned: Young, Hip, & Married website Young, Hip, & Married Insta

This episode’s drinks: chai tea. We talk about mindfulness, social media, business planning, and batching our work so we can be more present. Find the shownotes at drinkswithaminister.com/20/.

This episode’s drinks: all the coffee   Topics we covered: How Katie and Kinsey decided to make a venue on the family farm How to handle being family and business partners Separating the business from who you are as a person How they work to see things from their business partner’s point of view What they didn’t anticipate going in: PAPERWORK The issues Katie and Kinsey ran into as they built their venue like the ceremony location or providing chairs The tyranny of the pressure to go full-time on your side hustle (we say DO YOU, BOO!) The problem with equating money with successful creativity Knowing when to pivot from what you’re currently doing Why patience is the most underrated quality in business Why you shouldn’t freak out when Facebook / Instagram / Twitter changes their algorithm “People got so fascinated with tools that they forgot about the basics.” Katie Why you need to keep your social media real so people can genuinely connect with you Methods to deal with fans who know you but you don’t know th

This episode’s drinks: Starbucks cold brew Topics we covered: Australian celebrancy laws versus American officiating Marriage equality in Australia Religion and secularism in Australia Why I pushed the “Minister Marie” thing early in my career Why ceremony is so important in our lives How Josh doesn’t “write” a ceremony How Josh inspired me to challenge my style We discuss Field Notes versus Moleskine, Apple versus Android How our backgrounds and personal strengths come into our ceremony styles Why you need to chase your fears and not shy away from them Why Josh loves marriage but not necessarily weddings (what??) Why Josh and I both believe good marriages make for a better world The relationship between relationship coaching and marriage celebrancy I marvel that Australia actually has a life skills class (WHY IS THIS NOT A THING EVERYWHERE??) Why I hate the common vow “I promise to never go to bed angry” How Josh and I have had to navigate the weird ideas we had about marriage with our very patient spouses

This episode’s drinks: Hot toddy & seabreeze Topics we covered: How a Manhattan girl came to LA and became a wedding DJ How the hipsters are bringing back bowling, skating, and other group activities We tell the stories of our first professional weddings Why we take our payments before the wedding We shout out to planners and coordinators (we love you!!) How we introduce the wedding timeline options to our couples We divulge our band nerd history The skill that allows DJ Maasha to keep the party going, aka “reading the crowd” We discuss how where couples spend their money tells you their priorities Whether officiants should have PA systems or not The big differences between East Coast and West Coast culture, even in weddings How weddings differ from other gigs DJs do Why it’s about how you handle mistakes, not just preventing them Finding flow state in your weddings The differences between a professional and an amateur My bone to pick with friendors who bail on couples the month of the wedding Why the vi

This episode’s drinks: Monster Topics we covered: Why representation matters The fun they had during their engagement session How to decide what to wear to your engagement photo shoot How couples tend to start looking like each other How to handle wedding vendors when you’re a same sex couple How to pay for your wedding in pieces The share how they found all their wedding vendors on Instagram How Kaleigh proposed and how Brittini returned the favor Why they called their male wedding party “brideguys” How they are choosing to be pronounced They share the wedding horror story of a DJ calling the newlywed brides “bride and groom” How they met on Tinder, just like this couple Why the guest list was the most stressful part of wedding planning How starting their Instagram account has created a community How this political climate has affected their wedding experience and the LGBTQ community How the supportiveness of families help same-sex couples Their advice for how couples can weather wedding planning and still

This episode’s drinks: a proper British cuppa Topics we covered: What constitutes a good cuppa Why Natasha started Engaged and Ready Winning her first blogging award and then won “Best Bridal Real Talk” award Why we think her most popular blog post has to do with Game of Thrones The issues that block small business owners from hiring help The rule Beyond the To Do List (a GREAT podcast!) gave me about delegation How Natasha went from a BBC journalist to a celebrant ex-pat in Spain The crazy story of Natasha’s first wedding ceremony in Mexico We discuss the “wedding high” The interesting ways that the legal and the ceremonial happens separately in Europe and the UK How celebrants in Australia actually issue the legal marriage paperwork The craziness of getting legally married in Spain (because it’s all about the church ceremony) When tradition enhances the experience versus when tradition gets in the way How we both developed our celebrancy in isolation and why Natasha feels the European Celebrants’ Collectiv

This episode’s drinks: Grizzly Paw Raspberry Ale and Longshadow’s IPA by Blind Man Brewing   Topics we covered: Why I sat in with Four Brewers’ recording How Kaela and I met (yay WeddingMBA!) How different Canadian and American officiants operate Why officiants should dive out of the way for that first kiss We discuss the importance of the pre-ceremony pow-wow Why I created a tequila unity ceremony (I’m really proud of that thing!) Ways photographers and officiants (and all wedding vendors) can connect with each other Wedding season in Calgary versus wedding season in Southern California Kaela and Elijah explain what an iron pack is to me and how he got frostbite during a photo shoot for a couple I explain California desert heat for wedding season I share how Joshua Tree is so remote and the desert is just huge Kaela and Elijah share how large and wild Canada is How we try to point our couples to less popular spots to avoid crowds and drama How we figure out our maximums for the year Why Mondays and Thursday

This episode’s drinks: Iced Tea with a splash of lemonade   Topics we covered: How Laura went from a solo officiant to an agency How to define what your skill set really is When getting assistant makes sense What is an OBM or online business manager The different ways we made decisions about time versus money How we have had to learn to let go of control in our businesses How Tim Ferriss explains preparing for the worst case scenario Why reading is so important to our creativity “The way we do one thing is the way we do everything.” Laura Cannon Why the work-life balance isn’t the goal, integration is! How entrepreneurship can take over your life and if that’s a good thing How we handle the problem of serial entrepreneurship How Laura tries to maintain being present Laura shares how some massive losses in her life have taught her to take time Laura’s quarter of “Saying No” Why Laura decided to take time to enjoy other people’s creativity Why I’m making more room for celebrating and reveling in other’s art  

Topics we covered: We share our love of Disney Trego asks about my origin story as an officiant How I try to avoid burnout Why Uncle Bob may or may not know what’s up I share with Trego my diverse religious background How you never know what a couple will remember Trego shares his origin story as a DJ Why the wedding industry attracts a lot of actors, musicians, and other entertainers Why we love the wedding industry CEO dates and why they are so important Applying the Pareto Principle to my officiating business Why I admire people who can run agencies and the skill set that is required What it took for me to really fly my geek flag high How success can be addicting and challenging Trego shares his favorite part of the wedding day with couples The vulnerability of working weddings I share with Trego why I do the pre-wedding pow-wow The weirdness of vendors being gendered in the wedding industry  I share my officiating webinar series that’s in the works We discuss the virtues of different style mics How Vox D

Today I welcome Bethel Nathan, the Vice President of the International Association of Professional Wedding Officiants and the woman behind Ceremonies by Bethel and Elevate by Bethel to the podcast! This was a bit of big deal to me because when I first started Let’s Get Married SoCal, Bethel was one of the officiants who mentored me from afar without knowing it. Her inclusivity of the LGBTQ community, her transparency with her pricing and value, the warmth with which all her couples spoke about her all inspired me when I entered into the wedding industry. Since then, I’ve had the privilege of not only hearing Bethel speak at places like the Wedding MBA and WeddingWire World conferences, but have even gotten to socialize with her a bit on a personal level as well. I hope you enjoy our conversation as much as I did! This episode’s drinks: hot cocoa Topics we covered: How Bethel got into officiating Why it’s so important for wedding professionals to have a business plan How Bethel helped influence me so much fro

Jessica Carrillo of Art & Soul Events is joining us to talk about style, crediting your fellow wedding pros, and how Instagram changed everything for us. This episode’s drinks: white wine Topics we covered: Pin-up style and how I stumbled onto Jessica’s work How Jessica got into wedding planning via beauty school, film school, and real estate management Why I love Jessica’s style The importance of giving love (and credit!) to the wedding vendor team Why you should tag and list the vendors in Instagram We revisit officiant erasure The importance of acknowledging the individuals who help the couple along the way How we decided to share our personal lives and behind the scenes tidbits online How Instagram Stories changed the game for Jessica Why we value connecting with our couples as people matters so much How we keep boundaries between our public lives and our personal lives How Jessica adapts her boundaries as a creative entrepreneur Why you don’t need to show your “hot mess” to keep it real How Jessica

Alex Bruce Photography is back! This time we talk about those FAQ we often get from couples. This episode’s drinks: Ommegang beer (Alex) and Sonic Screwdriver (me) Topics we covered: Do you need a second shooter for your wedding? Why you need to ask your officiant more than if they are available on your date and their price Officiant sticker shock Why 30 minutes for your wedding isn’t just 30 minutes of your officiant’s time The benefits of having an engagement session with your photographer Tips for what to wear to your engagement session The art of ceremony I display how little I know about professional cameras What Alex wishes potential clients would ask him What I wish potential clients would ask me How you can incorporate Futurama (or anything else!) into your wedding Why you should stick to your guns about your wedding choices Inspiration versus replication and plagiarism How I take inspiration from the ideas my couples give How to broach the subject when the wedding pro you want is just out of your pr

Daniela VillaRamos from Once Upon a Vow is a New York City based “wedding wordsmith” AKA wedding officiant. She specializes in custom and bilingual Spanish ceremonies.   This episode’s drinks: Angry Orchard Hard Cider   Topics we covered: How Daniela and I discovered each other How Daniela got into officiating How I got into officiating Why Daniela prefers meeting in person before allowing a couple to book her services Why I love that couples never even have to talk with me if they don’t want to How serving religious couples brings up interesting concerns for non-religious officiants We share our religious upbringing and how it has impacted our businesses We respond to the “marriage is just a piece of paper” thing What we think the wedding ceremony is all about We discuss our 2017 goals How she plans her time on wedding day as a New Yorker versus how I plan my time as Californian How we handle marriage license filings   Links to the awesome things and people mentioned: Daniela’s website is Once Upon a Vow,

Keri Rico is one of my elopement photographers and a nerdy friend who is into Doctor Who, table-top gaming, and LARPing (Live-Action Role Play for the uninitiated).   This episode’s drinks: Wilson Creek Sparkling Almond Wine and Keri’s tequila with lime juice on the rocks   Topics we covered: How Keri and I met Why I say I’m “not kind of minister” Why Keri was so hesitant to join my elopement team Wedding photography versus elopement photography Our favorite Southern California elopement locations Keri’s fear of goose poop and how that elopement still turned out beautifully We talk about LARPing and how that has influenced her relationship There’s a new affordable and offbeat venue in Southern California and Keri is a part of it! Where Keri is at in her own wedding planning How the relationships change with marriage I share how I get to do a Scottish quaich or common cup ceremony with Scotch! We talk about our goals for 2017 and my bucket list   Links to the awesome things and people mentioned: You can che

Michael and Andrew are one of my favorite couples over the years. They discuss their experience planning their wedding and all the dram that comes with that.   This episode’s drinks: Fake It Sangria!   Topics we covered: What it was like planning their wedding as a gay couple in Southern California Why they had a hard time finding an officiant How to let go on wedding day when you’re a control freak The “oh shit” moment that happens for every couple Why Michael and Andrew disappeared the morning of their wedding Why I tell all my couples “FOR-EV-ER!” Michael and Andrew tell their engagement story What changes when you get married even after you’ve been together for years They share how they met (I can’t tell you how many people meet at clubs!) How I made Michael blush They share how they wanted to be parents and then decided to get married We discuss the difficulties they had with their caterer The high pressure of perfect on weddings How Michael and Andrew feel about their dream wedding over a year later Wh

Han Hills is a humanist celebrant in South Carolina who loves personal and touching ceremonies. This episode’s drinks: green tea and green jasmine tea. Topics we covered: Officiant erasure – why does the belt get credited in wedding magazines but the officiant doesn’t? Why the wedding ceremony isn’t just the necessary thing that has to happen between photos and the party The art of the ceremony Common cup ceremony, including why I created a tequila unity ceremony Why we love it when couples write their own vows even if it means just customizing repeat after me style vows “You create sound ripples that create emotion ripples that change the universe.” – Han Hills You don’t have to sit through the ceremony to earn the drink! Why we think clergy should be taught how to do ceremonies and not just sermons I share why I’ve considered becoming a Universalist Unitarian minister The importance of ritual in ceremonies and life at large How to be present instead of nervous during a ceremony Why officiants have differen

My bestie is back! Minister Carla Panzera Ulloa of My Dream Ceremony joins me to chat about all kinds of crazy wedding goodness. This episode’s drinks: Coffee made with Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf Crème Brulee coffee with milk and sugar. Topics we covered: Rain day plans for outdoor weddings What it is like to get hit on as the wedding officiant Funny reactions we get as female wedding officiants More funny reactions because we’re young officiants What jail and prison weddings in California are like Reviewing what elopements are and aren’t We discuss my Sweetheart Package Why arches and chairs have no place in an elopement How fun it was that Carla performed my 10-year vow renewal with my Husband My fun and ridiculous elopement adventures Carla tells her story about the surprise elopement she performed in a hot air balloon I share a surprise elopement story Do officiants get nervous or emotional at weddings? Why we both get nervous about weddings in full Spanish Why weddings are exhilarating and exhausting Wh

Adrianne Miller is an elopement blogger at SimplyElope.com and we discuss why we love elopements. This episode’s drinks: Adrianne was drinking Death Wish coffee and I was drinking a vanilla latte. Topics we covered: How Adrianne came to blog about elopements What makes an elopement different from an intimate wedding How Adrianne and I discovered each other Why we love elopements so much Dream elopement locations We gush about the romance of weddings as dedicated romantics Officiant blindness (you know I’ll rant about this) The pre-ceremony pow-wow I do before the wedding Why wedding coordinators and planners are so necessary on wedding day What is a concierge elopement service? What makes an amazing elopement Why professionals make all the different, even for an elopement I share several wonderful and ridiculous elopement stories with Adrianne Common misconceptions about elopements Big weddings are a fairly new concept Ethnic and cultural wedding traditions How we’ve experienced different people breaking dow

Alex Bruce is a wedding photographer in Southern California (alexbrucephotography.net) and we discuss why we love working in the wedding industry. This episode’s drinks: Alex was drinking St. Barnardus Abt 12 and I was drinking an eggnog martini. Marie’s Eggnog Martini Recipe Ingredients: 1.5 oz Absolut Vanilla vodka 0.75 oz Kahlua 4 oz Southern Comfort Eggnog Dash of cinnamon Instructions: Pour vodka, Kahlua, and eggnog into a martini shaker with ice. Shake for 5 seconds. Strain into a martini glass and dash the top with cinnamon. Serve immediately. Topics we covered: How Alex came into the wedding industry Why full-time is very different from one wedding vendor to another How much work happens behind the scenes for every wedding Unplugged wedding ceremonies versus the cell phone etiquette announcement The things that can go wrong during a wedding and why it’s not the end of the world The story of the fainting groom Dealing with family drama on wedding day Alex’s pet peeves What it’s like to do a family