The Art Of Coaching

When most people think about persuasion, they go straight to education (“if they just understood, they’d agree”), inspiration (“let me tell you an inspiring story”), or force (“do this now”).  But there’s a big difference between persuasion, influence, power, and warmth — and understanding that difference can change how you get things done.  This episode, inspired by a fable I read to my son, breaks down why subtlety often beats force, how warmth can shift behavior faster than pressure, and what that means in real-world situations.  Whether you’re a manager trying to get buy-in, a coach pushing for compliance, or anyone who needs to move people from point A to point B, you’ll get practical takeaways you can use immediately. Don’t forget: You’re never going to get better at dealing with challenging personalities—or improving your own communication—unless you actually come practice it in a hands-on setting. Check out one of our live, immersive workshops at: www.artofcoaching.com/events Upcoming Workshops:

These days, it feels like everyone is calling someone a narcissist. Ex-partner? Narcissist. Difficult boss? Narcissist. Confident stranger on Instagram? Must be a narcissist. The term has been thrown around so loosely that it’s lost its meaning—and worse, it’s become a lazy way to avoid reflection or real understanding. In this episode, we cut through the noise and get to the core of what narcissism really is—and what it isn’t. You’ll learn: Why narcissism exists on a spectrum—and why we all have narcissistic traits The difference between clinical, subclinical, and just human behavior The 4 distinct types of narcissism you’ll likely encounter in life or work How narcissistic traits show up in covert, communal, and even “insecure” ways Tactical ways to respond to each type—without losing your mind Why spotting narcissism in yourself isn’t something to fear—but something to work with If you’ve ever struggled to deal with someone manipulative, overly self-focused, or exhausting to be around… Or if you’ve

Have you ever gotten a negative review on something you've made or your business? Received a one-star rating? Dared to venture into the comment section—or worse—overheard someone trashing your work? It’s a law of the universe: haters are inevitable the moment you take a stance, make yourself visible, or grow in ways that challenge others' comfort or self image. In reality, most hate isn’t really about you. It’s what you represent. You’re the one who took the risk. You’re being seen.  You’re being recognized. And that shakes the stands they’re still sitting in—watching, critiquing, but never stepping foot in the arena themselves. This episode will help you separate noise from feedback, ugliness from something worth reflecting on, and how to tell when criticism should be used as locker room motivation—or ignored entirely. In today’s show, Brett will address this long overdue and fascinating case study in human nature, and cover: The deeper reasons people lash out—and what it has to do with power and control Wh

Wait... when did this become my fault? Why do I feel like I’m being indicted?  That’s not at all what I meant when I said that.  I have no idea how we got to the point where I’m the one feeling guilty. We’ve all been in this situation before. You thought you were having an honest conversation—but somehow, things flipped. Now it’s uncomfortable. You must have said something that offended them… right?  But did you?  How did what you said get twisted into that? And now, out of nowhere, you’re the bad guy. People can be simple, complex, complicated, and convoluted—all at the same time. Sometimes we send a clear input through someone, and because of ego, insecurity, or other unresolved stuff, it comes out the other side as something completely different, leaving them defensive. Now they’re projecting. And now you’re stuck dealing with the fallout. It’s more common than ever in the world we live in today—so let’s break it down. What kinds of tactics can we use to lower the temperature and get back on solid ground?

It can be one of the most frustrating things in the world. That discontent and confusion about your professional life and where it’s headed. The feeling that keeps you up at night, scrolling job postings, revisiting all the “what if’s” from your past, and daydreaming about a complete 180 you’ve always thought about, but never acted on. Staying in this mental space doesn’t just drain your energy, it leaves you lost, confused about your future and what a step forward even looks like. Whether you’re burnt out, fed up with the bureaucracy, or simply craving a new challenge— you need definitive clarity about what you want, along with an honest map of the current landscape so you can make the next right move. This episode will cut through the worry and wishful thinking as Brett lays out: How to identify which passion is worth acting on, even when your head is spinning with options A framework to pressure-test a career move—so you can dip a toe or get your foot in the door without blowing up your life The role of b

Nothing will haunt you like the things you leave unsaid. It’s a bold statement, and a chilling one—but unfortunately, most of us know exactly how true it is. You owe it to them and to yourself to speak the truth about what they mean to you. No matter the regrettable things you’ve said or done to each other... the failures, the absences, the apologies never given, or the love you didn’t express—it needs to get out. We’ve covered a wide range of topics since launching this podcast, but this one stands out as an evergreen. It’s a conversation that will withstand the test of time and deeply resonate with YOU. In this episode, Brett shoots straight from the heart and will explain: Why we often don’t say what needs to be said—how assumptions, pride, and fear keep olive branches from growing The danger of “safe” silence—and how it can quietly grow into full-blown regret How to make sure you’re not leaving yourself out of the conversation by silencing your own positive affirmations A practical strategy to turn that

Think about the last time you dealt with someone you were trying really hard to be professional with. Despite multiple miscommunications on their part — and what was clearly laziness, apathy, and them mailing it in — you kept trying to be the adult. You kept overcompensating for their lack of effort. You kept telling yourself, “Hold yourself to a higher standard.”   But it’s still getting you nowhere.   You want to lose it. You want to let them have it. But you hesitate — because everything in leadership and communication says “keep your cool.”   So the question becomes: At what point does that restraint stop helping and start hurting? At what point are you completely justified in going old-school — 1950s dad style — and giving someone a full-on ass-chewing?   What You’ll Learn:   •How to recognize when it’s time to stop playing nice and start holding the line •A real-world filter to help you decide when to confront someone directly •Why giving someone the business doesn’t mean losing your professionalism •Ho

“Is there anything I can do to help?” It’s interesting and unique how we’ve all been asked this question by a spouse, friend, co-worker, or boss—but it never feels like that question leads to you getting actual help. It often feels like answering that question will cause you even more issues.  But, people are asking it with good intentions, so how can we actually seize this moment and get some relief from the overload? We’re always told as leaders that we need to delegate, delegate, delegate—so how can we respond to this request without adding to our overwhelm? In today’s episode, Brett is going to give us all the answers—and much more—to this age-old question we all somewhat cringe when we hear. Lean in as he covers: The psychology and first principles behind why we often decline help—even when we need it Cognitive overwhelm—how to reduce it, cut through the fog, and get the help you need Practical strategies to truly show up for someone and show you care Default requests you can use to get quick results ba

This isn’t personal, but it’s been a long time coming. This episode is aimed directly at the legacy industries of Art of Coaching, Strength and Conditioning, and let’s throw overall fitness in there too. If you work in high performance, physical therapy included, you’re included.  We know everyone deals with some version of this, but we’re speaking to the world we know best. The message? Most of you say you want to be the best. Most of you say you’re “in it for the right reasons.” But you’re not. You’re full of shit. You’ve built a self-serving feedback loop—one that props up your ego and avoids any real discomfort. You’ll do anything but face your actual weaknesses. You whistle past the graveyard, pretending it’s all about the best exercises, protocols, or the next certification.  You could have the greatest program in the history of the world, but if you can’t work with the humans executing, it means nothing.  Today’s episode will hit each listener differently. Some will take it as a wake-up call. Others wi

Ever feel like you're coaching on repeat?  You've handed a client every tool they need, yet they keep circling back with the same issue.  Or maybe you're working with an athlete who hears everything you say, but nothing seems to land. It’s as if they’re outsourcing ownership of the entire process. It can start to feel like a rehearsed dance. You say your part, they nod along, and both of you move forward on autopilot. But this doesn’t have to be just frustrating—it can be an inflection point for us.  In today’s episode, Brett breaks down how to navigate this all-too-common dynamic and use it as a way to better understand what we bring to the table. Because when we hone in on and embrace our unique intangibles—those strong qualities that might even turn some people off—we create opportunities to lead more effectively, grow our business, and stand out in a noisy, boring world where everyone just wants to fit in. In this episode, we cover: No matter what they say, clients come back for more than just results Qu

Coaching youth sports can be one of the most rewarding things you can do, whether you're a parent, a former athlete, or someone who just wants to make a difference. It’s an incredible opportunity to connect with people in a way that can genuinely shape who they become. Youth sports span the full range—from high-priced, high-stakes travel leagues to your local rec department. From paid coaches with professional experience, to the dad who just answered the 7,000th email asking for help. You won’t find a show that cares more about coaches than this one, so this isn’t one of those episodes that’s here to bash the people who’ve stepped up when no one else would. What this episode will be is a look from multiple angles, through the lens of someone who’s coached at a high level and is now a parent on the sidelines.  What does real coaching actually look like? What should a good practice feel like? And how do we make sure we’re giving kids our best—not just for them, but for the people who care the most and invest th

This episode is for a very specific type of person.  Those of you who are hard on yourself, and if you're being honest, it's to an unhealthy degree. The perfectionist who struggles to recognize their own accomplishments, who tears themselves apart over minor slip-ups, and maybe even finds it hard to fully celebrate the wins of others. Not because of jealousy, but because the voice in your head has been trained to fixate on what’s missing instead of what’s been earned. Maybe you’re not wired this way all the time, but after a big achievement, you felt... nothing. Maybe even a little depressed that it didn’t feel like more. We know many of you in our audience fall into one of these camps—and this episode is for you. Here’s a little premeditated tough love: at some point, it has to be good enough.  So how do we move past this all-or-nothing mentality we’ll never win? How can we celebrate our accomplishments without dulling our edge? In this episode, Brett breaks down: The 70% Rule—it’s immeasurable value and ho

Why can't someone else step up and do this? How come I'm always the one who has to do everything? What more do I have to do before someone finally takes some initiative? If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions—or just quietly felt them—you’re not alone. That heavy sense of responsibility, the emotional and cultural weight of having to carry your team day after day, will wear you down. And if you don’t have a plan to offload that burden and bring others into ownership, it’s only a matter of time before burnout sets in. But what do you do when some team members aren’t exactly charismatic—or worse, seem like they’re only halfway committed? This episode hits close to home, pulled straight from a challenge one of our mentoring clients has been facing for years. It’s also something Brett knows firsthand. In this episode, we’ll cover: The main shortcoming of servant-based leadership, and how to overcome it How to diagnose energy leaks in your ecosystem before they push you into burnout The 3 types of energy b

Everything is okay at work, but… yeah, work is fine—I just don’t know what I’m going to do. We’ve all felt like that at some point in our careers. Maybe you’re in that place right now. Call it a rut, stagnation, or just a funk. You’re motivated. You’re grateful. But you also want more. More fulfillment, more autonomy, maybe even a title change and a bigger office. You want to feel like your strengths are being seen and put to use. When that doesn't happen, dissatisfaction can start to seep into everything else—negatively impacting your mental health and personal life. So what do you do with that?  In this short episode, Brett breaks down how to get (and stay) unstuck, move forward with intention, and take ownership without letting that ugly feeling of bitterness creep in. What You’ll Learn: Why the premortem matters and how it keeps you from crashing Getting out of the entitlement trap around promotions How to discuss feelings of stagnation with leadership while still holding yourself accountable Establishin

We’ve all felt it. That awkward disconnect when the vibe is off and you're wondering how you ended up across the table from someone who just isn’t where you are. Maybe you’re in different stages of life, chasing different things, or just not clear on what the other actually wants. Whatever the reason, the moment hits: this isn’t it. It’s not easy to find someone emotionally mature enough to show up. Someone who isn’t hiding behind the damage of past relationships or stuck reliving the pain of a breakup they never really moved on from. And even harder? Finding someone willing to do the work, to build something real, instead of ghosting or bailing the minute things get remotely tough or inconvenient. But this isn't just an episode for people looking for love. It's about communication, emotional availability, and knowing what you bring to the table—because relationships, romantic or not, reveal a lot about who we are and how we lead. In this episode, Brett gets personal and delivers the truth about: Confronting

We’ve all been hit by it. It seemingly comes out of nowhere—a misunderstanding or argument we never saw coming. One moment you’re having a discussion, the next you're blindsided by resistance, vitriol, or passive-aggressive blowback. Where did it come from? Why did something small suddenly feel so personal? Here’s the truth: it’s rarely about the thing—it’s about what the thing represents. Control. Trust. Identity. Relevance. Fear. A loss of autonomy. There’s always something else simmering under the surface. And if you want to be effective in high-stakes conversations or high-pressure environments, you have to be able to read those underlying signals, not just bulldoze with logic. In this episode Brett unpacks exactly how to do that and covers: How to diagnose the real reason behind someone’s resistance Why linking your message to their character is more effective than chasing compliance How to foster autonomy by making it feel like their idea Why perception, not logic, is the real engine of influence and l

Why is talking about money so hard?  An even better question might be: why do so many job postings treat compensation like a state secret—vague, unclear, or completely absent?  The truth is, people want to know they’ll be respected and valued. If you leave them guessing, they’ll start looking elsewhere. In Part 1 of this hiring series, we covered how to attract the right candidates. In Part 2, we dug into asking the right questions during interviews. In Part 3, we’re focusing entirely on compensation, because how you talk about pay tells a story about how you value people. In this episode, Brett breaks down: The 3 most common ways companies list compensation—and how to determine which is right for you How to shift people away from obsessing over base salary and toward the bigger picture of total value Creative ways to incentivize your team without blowing up your budget How to foster loyalty and stop roles from becoming revolving doors If you need further assistance with this topic or anything else involvin

Most interviews miss the mark. Predictable questions. Rehearsed answers. And when it’s over, you still haven’t figured out who the person really is. In Part 1 of this series, we covered what matters most when it comes to attracting the right candidates. Today is about what happens next. How do you actually assess whether someone can solve the real problems you are hiring them to tackle or if they’re the right fit? The truth is, most people can talk a good game and tell you what you’d like to hear. But when the lights come on and things get messy, can they think on their feet? Can they take initiative? Can they adapt when the environment or expectations change? In this episode, Brett walks you through how to run interviews that actually reveal who someone is, not just who they pretend to be, and breaks down: A smarter way to structure interviews using the DEEP framework How a simple role clarity doc keeps you from hiring the wrong person Questions that expose if someone can solve real problems or just talk we

Hiring the right people doesn’t start with the interview — it starts with the job posting. In this first episode of our hiring series, we tackle a question we hear all the time from mentoring clients: How do I find better candidates?  Whether you’re a business owner, a team leader involved in hiring, or even someone applying for jobs, this one’s for you. We break down a simple but effective framework to help you diagnose and improve your hiring process from the ground up. This isn’t theory or a fluffy LinkedIn post, just real talk and practical tools you can apply right away. What You’ll Learn in This Episode: A breakdown of the HITS framework and how it can instantly level up your job postings Why generic, vague titles are quietly killing your candidate pool What a structured, efficient hiring process looks like, and why speed and clarity matter Why expressing your team’s true culture upfront helps attract the right fit (and repel the wrong ones) Bonus: Talking salary in your job posting — the only 3 ways t