Dump Stats

On this episode of Dump Stats... Jurm suffers the physical repercussions of the bar fight at the Los Tres Padres tavern, while Nathaniel and Dash try to cover their tracks with the local law enforcement. The Christopher's Cross gains two (and a half) new crew members, and Nero finally reunites with the Bad Humanoids! What's next for the crew of The Christopher's Cross? Will their half-cocked rebellion ever find its legs? Will Nero take to his new alignment? Will Stellan Delgado ever stop stirring the proverbial pot? Will we ever get Stellan Skaarsgard to voice the part of Stellan Delgado?  Find out on this brand new episode of Dump Stats!

Tonight on Dump Stats... The Bad Humanoids sit through an Open Mic Night (morning) and attempt to recruit some local ruffians for their cause. Though, they aren't really sure what their cause is! They need to keep a low profile, but that never seems to work out for our heroes.  After bringing Nathaniel and Jurm up to speed on the goings on in Santa Ignacia, AceBuzz hits the stage for a rousing rendition of his favorite song. Dash Millenial shows off her musical, and magical, talents at the Los Tres Padres Open Mic Night, much to the delight of the entire bar. How can a simple Open Mic Night turn into a disaster? Just listen and find out on this week's episode of Dump Stats!

Tonight on Dump Stats... Nero begins to feel the dangerous consequences of his cosmic card game with Bean Hilltopple, the mysterious Halfling Bard he met in the Purple World. As Nero continues to explore this space between realities, he discovers new secrets about the Gods Voska and Valia, and rediscovers an old familiar with a new look and a bad attitude. Meawhile, Jurm, Nathaniel and Dash are still at the Los Tres Padres tavern in Arakalia meeting with Acebuzz. He fills them in on everything thats been going on on Santa Ignacia since the Incident. Hambone, or Steven Delgado as he likes to be called, has been made Governor of Santa Ignacia, and has instituted martial law and reinstated the magic curfew and doubled it to include day as well as night times. No one has seen or heard from Rax, he is presumed dead. AceBuzz also reveals a disturbing secret about Jeff, his frat brother from Wizard House...according to Mage's College records, Jeff dies 2 years ago...which means the Jeff we know and love and distru

Welcome to a new episode of Dump Stats! Our heroes have been sailing for months, avoiding the Canderan Royal Navy and waiting for Nero to awaken from his magically induced slumber. Jurm and Nathaniel recieve a coded message from AceBuzz, an old aquaintance from the Mage's College and a member of Wizard House, the college's only fraternity. They are to meet AceBuzz at the Los Tres Padres Tavern on the island chain of Arkalia. Can AceBuzz be trusted? What information does he have for the party? I don't know, but I did once see him drink an entire 30 rack of Natty Ice and not puke...It was weird. Meanwhile, Nero's "dreams" are becoming more and more real, blurring the lines between Life, Death, Reality and Imagination. His only guidance through this "Purple World" is a talkative tree and a mysterious Halfling named Bean Hilltopple. Can Nero navigate his way back to the waking world and away from certain doom? Will the gang ever make sense of their shaky situation? Who was phone? Find out tonight on...Dump Sta

Tonight on Dump Stats...Nero is still sleeping aboard the Christopher's Cross, but is there more going on in his mind than simple dreams? Nothing is ever simple when it comes to the Bad Humanoids. In the waking world, Jurm and Nathaniel deal with a grumpy Billings, and a restless crew. They assemble an away team to meet AceBuzz at the Los Trés Padres tavern, and set off in a rowboat towards the neutral island chain of Arkalia... put on some coffee, its going to be a long day for our intrepid adventurers. The Bad Boys of tabletop RPGs are back with another installment of Dump Stats! You may be wondering, are you guys playing Dungeons & Dragons? Pathfinder? Some weird hybrid of the two? The answer is, Pathfinder, but sometimes we forget the rules and our GM improvises and we fall into a weird moshpit of roleplaying goodness. It keeps us on our toes! But the world and characters are 100% original content, created by our criminally insane Dungeon Master (Game Master whatever) and our whackadoo players at the

Its the official Season 2 premiere of Dump Stats! Back by popular demand! We hope you had a Happy Easter, because Dump Stats has officially been resurrected for a second season! We've got more jokes, more dice, more actual rolling of said dice and using the actual game rules! Also we've got more action, more drama and most importantly, MORE EPISODES!  Big thanks to everyone who has been listening and even giving us your feedback! We've got some awesome artwork from listeners and even some suggestions on how to improve the show and we are improving in every way!  In our premiere, the Bad Humanoids sail aimlessly in their ships, evading the Royal Navy and attempting to find a cure for Nero's affliction. He has been unconcsious since his run in with Velìa on Isla Norte. Morale is running low, and the ship's crews are getting restless. What will they do now? What can they do? Find out on Dump Stats!

Season 2 is here! Welcome back to all our old fans, and welcome to any new listeners! We know that not everybody has time to binge listen to 33+ hours of tabletop RPG goodness, so we made a clip show! This episode will summarize the major plot points of Season 1, to refresh everyone's memories. It is also a good jumping on point for anybody who just can't fathom the daunting task of listening to four grown men breathing heavily into sweaty microphones for 35 hours. We have so much enjoyed playing Pathfinder for our listeners, and we appreciate every one of you and value your feedback! Season 2 will be firing off hot! New and improved! Stronger, faster, funnier and more Dump Stattier than ever before!  

Its the Season 1 Finale of Dump Stats! Thank you to everyone who has listened to us from the start! And to everyone else, don't worry there will be a season 1 recap episode released soon! But we recommend listening to ALL 31 EPISODES!!!! We last left our heroes in dire straits! The royal navy is closing in on Isla Norte, and escape for the Bad Humanoids is becoming less and less likely. Governor Delgado is dead (thanks Billings) and Jurm and his crew make their escape INTO the prison! Nathaniel and Dash take on the town guard as they attempt to make off with two ships, The Dame's Kiss and The Old Crone. Meanwhile, Nero has only just escaped his own personal prison, a parallel dimension between time and space, as Stellan faces off against Rax and Gyro is caught somewhere in the middle of it all! Tune in for the epic conclusion of Dump Stats Season 1! Thank you all for allowing 4 grown men to shamelessly play their favorite game and call it work! We hope you all have and will continue to enjoy our passion for

Tonight on Dump Stats... Part I of our epic two part season finale will leave you with dragons in your dungeons and pee in your pants! Excessive hyperbole aside, we have a very exciting episode for you.  When we last left our adventurers, Jurm and Billings had walked right into Governor Delgado's trap, Nathaniel (with help from Alan Davenport) had a run in with some city guard at the docks, and Nero was being hounded by Rax's chaotic dreamscape and annoyed by his father's sudden enthusiasm for adventure! Picking up new crew members Dash, Sneak and Eldeth Ghoram Smashington, the Bad Humanoids have got their work cut out for them if they ever hope to escape this island... Thank you all for listening to North Carolina's favorite Dungeons & Dragon's podcast! Technically, we play Pathfinder, but we also bend the rules a lot!  

Tonight on Dump Stats... After escaping the flaming blacksmith shop, the Bad Humanoids say goodbye to Jurm's Crazy Arms. Fleeing the town guard, our heroes plus Stellan and Gyro make for the docks on the north end of Isla Norte. Jurm gives a heartfelt speech to his old crew and convinces them to rescue his former captain and suspected father James T. Crowley before he can be executed for piracy. All they need now is a plan! Enter Rockwell "Billings" Smashington, the former blacksmith, and his ship the Drake's Sigh...Drake's Eye? Drake's Sigh. Whatever. It might fly, but who knows? This dwarf loves mystery as much as Alan Davenport hates mustard!  Thank you all for listening to North Carolina's favorite Dungeons & Dragon's podcast! Technically, we play Pathfinder, but we also bend the rules a lot!

Welcome back to Dump Stats, North Carolina's own Dungeons and Dragons actual play podcast. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day! Show us how much you love us by listening, liking and subscribing! We last left our adventurers trapped inside of a blacksmith shop as the City Guard surrounds them. In a strange turn of events, Jurm has talked his way out of trouble, while Nathaniel faces off against the Captain of the Guard and Nero bumbles through numerous stealth attempts ending in a swarm of mischievous monkeys pouring out of the halfling's mouth and attacking a platoon of guards. Now, with mayhem afoot, the crew must make a daring escape and get to the docks by midnight. How long can the Bad Humanoids keep this up? Will they escape the island? Will the mysteries of the island ever be revealed? Or will we pull a J.J. Abrams on you all? If so, will we ever get away with it? Only one way to find out! Keep listening to Dump Stats!

Tonight on Dump Stats... Twas the night before Voskañar and all through the shoppe, The Bad Humanoids were hiding and lying to cops, Jurm flew off the handle and told a big lie, "Yes, and..." said Nathaniel, he's such a good guy! While Stellan and Gyro escaped out the back,  Nero tried stealthing and fell with a CRACK! Down in the basement, Nathaniel is trapped, While the guards in the alley cut Nero no slack, When what to our wondering ears did appear, But a peck of Mad Monkeys spouting nonsense and jeers! Roll your initiative, hold on to your hats, Will the Bad Humanoids keep rolling nats? ...Find out tonight, on an all new Dump Stats!

Tonight on Dump Stats... The Bad Humanoids go back to the future...or present? Whatever. They are back FROM the past and are laying low at Jurm's Crazy Arms discussing their next move. What are the consequences of their meddling in time? Has anyone noticed their crimes? Is Billings still locked in the basement? Will Rob, John, Mike and Bob finally win Dungeons and Dragons? Who knows? Decide for yourself on a brand new Dump Stats!!

The gripping conclusion to the time traveling misadventures of the Bad Humanoids! While Nathaniel and Jurm botch their deal with Billings the blacksmith, Stellan and Nero seek out Nero's father Gyro Gamwich. Along the way, Nero learns about the severe and deadly consequences of meddling with time and Chronopathy magic. The gang sees an old friend, and experiences some deja vu while they attempt to set things straight with the space-time continuum. All this plus the usual hijinx on this episode of Dump Stats!

The Bad Humanoids go back in time! Sort of. After devising a plan to escape the Mage's College by sea, our heroes realize that they don't have a ship! Nathaniel and Jurm will have to travel through time to retrieve the stolen deed to their stolen ship, all while trying to outsmart the Dwarf blacksmith Billings. Meanwhile, Nero and Stellan make for the local hotel to save Nero's father Gyro Gamwich from any unwanted legal consequences. Will our heroes succeed? Or will they create a hole in the space-time continuum and unmake all of existence? Find out on thig brand new episode of Dump Stats!

The Bad Humanoids successfully elude capture after fleeing the massacre at the Grand Archives. Nathaniel, as Alan Davenport, discovers an otherworldly link between Nero's Bag of Holding and the Bad Humanoids' apartment. After conversing briefly with the Ghost of Dogshits Past, the gang discovers a whole new problem hidden in the magical pockets of the mysterious bag. A problem of the dead variety. What to do? Who knows? Time travel? Maybe. Find out on this episode of Dump Stats! Also, sorry about technical difficulties the last few weeks. We've worked out the problem and will be back on schedule! Thank you everyone for your continued support!

Putting episode 22 of Dump Stats back up after a few technical issues led to some faulty files and out of order uploads and whatnot. I also lost that awesome description from last time, wherein it was revealed the Dump Stats universe takes place inside Terry Crews's left pectoral muscle, after he flexed it too hard and turned inward on himself while chopping down a tree for firewood for his family, whose house was too cold during a blizzard and the heat went out. Jimmith the Mage lost his inheritance on a faulty bag of fluffy dust, which enraged the spirit of his grandfather, who began haunting Jimmith. His spirit was released from the tree Terry Crews chopped down. And, where is Billy "Billie Jean" Gene in all this? Is he the one pulling the levers? HEY LOOK AT THAT! I pretty much remembered it. I guess it's hard to forget that type of genius.

Welcome to a new episode of Dump Stats! While the world of make believe may be full of wizard houses and gang activity (has anyone alerted Donald Trump? We hear he's deporting anyone involved in gang activity), the real world is full of depressing elections and financial database hacking at Target that disconnects payment accounts and diverts money to oppressive regimes in Chechnya. One election, one new card, and a week of depression later, we're back! And this time, we're finally getting into some plot! Sort of. The Bad Humanoids found a crazy sentient book and its been very persuasive. Now its time to get some answers! The gang plans a raid on the Grand Archive at the Mage's College and unfortunately recruits one of the boys from Wizard House to help them out. Things are about to get real on this episode of Dump Stats!

Tonight on Dump Stats... Jurm makes a very big purchase without consulting Nathaniel and Nero. Nathaniel has an awkward encounter while trying to tip his tour guide. Bob and Rob have a brief sing-a-long (out of character). Nero has a very difficult first day of class and a teacher at the Mage's College may be getting fired. Later, Nero finds a very interesting book, while Jurm and Nathaniel prepare for the Grand Opening of Crazy Jurm's Armoretum. All this and more hijinx on Dump Stats, Greensboro's #1 Dungeons and Dragons podcast.

It's time for a new Dump Stats! This week, Jurm deals with conflicting emotions and has a smash party. Nathaniel takes a tour of the city and learns a thing or two about the history of Santa Ignacia. Nero has another out of body experience and becomes suspicious of Jeff's motives. Nothing is what it seems, and no one can be trusted. Can you? Can I? Find out on Dump Stats!