Tysto Film Commentaries

Join me as I join John Pavlich of Sofa Dogs to have a look at Quentin Tarantino's finest masterpiece. We discuss the narrative structure, the characters, the themes and motifs, and the feet. We compare the film to Tarantino's other films, the films and books he pays homage to, and Robert Rodriguez's films. We try to figure out which sequence is the weakest and why some scenes are even in the movie. I think I spot Teague Chrystie's apartment. And we copyright a Beverly Hills horror movie idea.

Join me and the crew of Film Bin for one of the greatest westerns ever made. It's a fun, funny, sometimes-poignant shoot-'em-up from 1960 with an all-star cast (well, nearly), and a top-notch pedigree. We compare the film to the sequels, The Seven Samurai, Ocean's Eleven, The Three Amigos, A Bug's Life, Westworld, Return of the Jedi, Home Alone, and Postman Pat. We recast it for no reason and also try to reset it in Britain. We poke it for flaws and find almost none. (Why give them back their guns, tho, seriously?) And we invent a couple of back stories and sequels (and copyright them!) involving werewolf hunting and hangovers.

Join me and Jimmy B as we examine the genius that is Predator (1987) [there's a remake coming]. We discuss each of the principle actors and their careers and political aspirations, who could have been in the film, and how awesome the film is. We both love it and marvel at its solid construction and timeless story of mercenaries being hunted in a jungle by a Rastafarian fish-man. We play around with recasting the film in a later era and discuss the sequels.

It's the heartwarming story of a Welsh commando and his intrepid American sidekick, their girlfriends, and a great deal of dynamite cutting a swath of destruction across the German mountainside and a trail of dead bodies a couple of miles long. Richard Burton shuffles off his Shakespearean coil and dons an SS officer's uniform to wax poetical about how much he loves Hitler or maybe not or maybe, it's very confusing. I think at one point he is acting as a quadruple agent. The plot is nevertheless watertight; the acting is terrific; the directing workmanlike; and the stunt work spectacular. It's one of the greatest WW2 adventures committed to film and my teenage memory, keeps up a breakneck pace (sometimes literally), and it's so long you can take a nap at a couple of points and not miss any of the ridiculously complicated plot. I wax poetical about the guns, cars, and aircraft, explain who is who, determine if the film passes the Bechdel Test, and generally have a good time, altho I mix up the aerial tramway

Join me as I delve into JJ Abrams' take on the Mission: Impossible series and examine how he makes it his own (by kind of turning it into Alias). I can't remember "the Welshman" from the second movie ("You know! Hannibal Lector!"), and I stumble between character names and actor names. I complain that it's all a little too familiar (like first-movie familiar and sometimes James-Bond familiar), but I give credit where credit is due to Cruise, Abrams, the DP, and the rest of IMF.

Join me as I join John Pavlich of Sofa Dogs once again, this time for a look at Fede Alvarez's remake of Sam Raimi's silly-fun 1981 horror flick The Evil Dead. This one is serious, flatter, and way better made (altho I still prefer the original). Thrill to the blood and mud! Squeal at the shout-outs to the original! Listen as I fail to fully interpret the film makers' intent! (In my defense, it's not on screen.)

Join me for a stroll thru the hallowed halls of American history and pseudo-history with Nicolas Cage and friends. I compare the film to its sequel, Indiana Jones, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Goonies, and the 1960s Batman TV show. I enjoy the real/realistic history, blame the Gates family for the loss of the treasure in the first place, and rewrite the film to be about something else.

Join me and Hardy Lynch of The Speakeasy as we try to make sense of the latest Super-debacle. Hardy likes it more than I do, but we both have decent fun with it. We analyze the odd structure and tone and character motivations. We wonder if it would work better if it weren't about Superman at all. And we wonder if there's anywhere to go after the world was nearly destroyed by a terraforming kryptonforming machine. We compare the film to other Superman movies, Star Trek (2009), X-Men, other superhero movies, Prometheus, and pretty much anything else that crosses our minds.

Join me and Drew of Trek FM as we experiment on our own brains with the help of James Franco and a ton of CGI until we see apes everywhere. We analyze the structure of the film and compare it to the old Apes movies, the sequel, and "Flowers for Algernon", Deep Blue Sea, and Dragonball Z. And we wonder who the hell "Rupert Wyatt" is. We puzzle over some minor plot holes, try to "fix" the film, and create our own sequels and crossovers. I question James Franco's salary and taste in vehicles; Drew compares James Franco to C-3P0; and we both try to figure out who the villain is.

Join me as I join the Doctor and Lynch of The Speakeasy as we have a good time with Christopher Nolan's dour superhero and superior villain. We like the film a lot but feel that the sheen has somewhat worn off and the story is revealed as threadbare now. We give praise where praise is due, and joke our way thru the slow sections and weird choices.

Join me and the crew of Film Bin for a look at Blake Edwards' 1965 ensemble comedy about a motor race from New York to Paris. It's the heartwarming and rib-tickling romantic adventure starring Tony Curtis, Natalie Wood, and Jack Lemmon. It's big, it's kind of corny, and it's so long it has another movie inside it. We analyze the ensemble comedy phenomenon, try to figure out Tony Curtis, try to determine the nature of the relationship between Max and Professor Fate, and try to keep up the pace during a 30-minute saloon brawl. I try to rewrite the film to include more of the prince, we compare the food fight to other cinematic food fights, and we try to figure out what that thing is that Natalie Wood is wearing.

Join John Pavlich of Sofa Dogs and me as we delve into the historical drama of the youth, life, and presidency of Abraham Lincoln. We examine the issues of the day and the difficult moral decisions that Lincoln faced, such as the "peculiar institution" of slavery and when to try to kill the vampire who murdered his mother. We compare the film to superhero movies, the mockbuster Abraham Lincoln vs Zombies, and more. John likes the film but my initial enthusiasm has gradually waned, altho I still like the acting and most of the action.

Join me and Mike of Commentary Track Stars as we delve into the mysteries that are John Woo, Robert Towne, Notorious, and Tom Cruise's psyche in this, the second of the Mission: Impossible series. We discuss the structure of the film, its suspicious similarity to the Hitchcock classic, and its differences from the other Mission: Impossible movies. We compare it to the Bond films, other John Woo films, and other action movies of its time. We speculate on Dougray Scott as Wolverine, what the series would have been like with more Anthony Hopkins, and Tom Cruise's personal knowledge of how heavy $63 million dollars is.

Join me as I explore the first of Tom Cruise's action movie tours de force, adapted from the nearly actionless TV series of the same name. Impossible, you say? Oh quite possible indeed if you throw out everything the TV show did. I examine the differences between the movie's treatment of IFM and the 1960s TV show. I consider Tom Cruise as a thinking-man's action movie star, Brian De Palma as a director, Jon Voight as an IMF lead, and the locations as locations. I compare it to Rafifi, Topkapi, Die Hard and Knight and Day. I consider the idea of taking the TV show's premise and complicating it until it becomes ridiculous. I pull apart story elements like the insider-gone-bad and the nonsensical parts of the plot like the use of bible verses.

Join me and Rob Caravaggio of Rob Caravaggio Commentaries as we tackle one of the great films of the western genre and indeed of all time. We compare the stories of each of the three characters and the careers of the men who play them. We admit that the film is a bit long and try to decide what to cut. We contemplate westerns, Eli Wallach, circles, stray dogs, cripples, the film industry in the mid-1960s, war films, and actual wars. And we try to figure out what "good" really means in this context. We compare the film to the previous two films in the trilogy, Tarantino's work, Kurosawa's work, and film noir. We recast the film with other 1960s actors. We praise the music and titles, the cinematography, the set design--pretty much everything. I call the film nearly perfect. Rob gives away the magic of podcasting (we sometimes have discussions off-mike). Bonus: I get the obsessive-compulsive gun stuff out of the way early.

Join me for a sight-unseen examination of The Asylum's heartwarming tale of research scientists in Antarctica falling in and out of love and encountering (I don't want to spoil it for you) certain challenges. I complain about the dialog and lack of active protagonists, and I root for Hitler OR DO I? I compare the film to Futurama and, uh, films and examine the artistic choice of slow-motion. I question the science a time or two, and the choice of lenses used on Dominique Swain. I do not question the lenses used on Jake Busey. Use any lens you want; the man can't be photographed badly.

Join me and Hardy Lynch of The Speakeasy for my FIRST Stanley Kubrick commentary! It's the heartwarming story of a nation whose rogue member starts World War 3 and the brave men (and only men) who make a vague and ineffectual effort to stop it. We compare it to Fail-Safe, which came out the same year, as well as Kubrick's other films and Mars Attacks. We discuss the careers of Kubrick, Sellers, and Keenan Wynn. We analyze the brilliant screenplay, the analogy to Cold War tensions, and the films possible affect on the audience, including America's leaders. And we try to recast it with Mike Meyers, Sam Rockwell, Josh Brolin, and James Earl Jones (in the Ripper role this time).

Join me as I'm joined for the first time by Jimmy B from the Friends in Your Head forum and Extended Edition podcast for a look at Sylvester Stallone and Kurt Russell's big team-up. We compare it to Lethal Weapon, Police Story, Die Hard, other buddy-cop comedies of the time, and James Bond movies. We also marvel at their hair and suits, and at a still-humble Teri Hatcher. We stand in awe that the film ever saw the light of day because, at some point, everybody but Stallone got replaced at least once.

Join me as I join the entire Film Bin crew to have a look at the wonderfully campy and adventurous Flash Gordon. It's the heartwarming tale of boy meets girl, boy and girl are kidnapped by a scientist and forced to travel to space, where they are kidnapped by a dictator, girl loses boy, boy is kidnapped by another girl, then imprisoned by her boyfriend... Long story short, boy gets girl and only has 14 hours to save the earth. We compare it to Star Wars, Superman, Indiana Jones movies, Highlander, the original film serial, Barbarella, Doctor Who, The Wizard of Oz, and Buckaroo Banzai. We analyze the physics of Mongo, the force of nature that is Brian Blessed, and the possibility that Klytus designs all the costumes on Mongo. We fix Hollywood action movies and align the DC universe and Star Wars universe with this one.

Join me as I join the Doctor and Lynch for a second go at the first of Christopher Nolan's Batmen. We compare the film to the comic books, other Nolan Batmen, Burton/Schumaker Batmen, and The Shadow. We examine the logic of the villains' plans and Batman's response. And we recast Morgan Freeman as a bad guy.