Jack's Silly Little Friendly Neighborhood Star Trek Discovery Podcast

It’s Reopening the Wormhole week up in this bitch, as RTW cohosts Sam and Kevin reunite with Jack to talk PAKLED PLANET SHENANIGANS, beloved anomalies, slugs and SCORPIONS and the RED SHIRTS.  The best way to kick off such a discussion is with an extended review of the work of Kurtwood Smith, before circling back to Kzintis, Ape Pokemon, Jack’s first taste of Hard Seltzer, his embarrassing Kiwi accent, and the works of Frank Miller.  The only thing that’s missing is Spider-Man 2!  GET OVER HERE!

It’s a Starbase-sized episode  as Jack calls back Barm, Sean, and Sam to talk about a really fun Lower Decks ep just jam-packed with Trek deep cuts, a heartwarming email section, and then close out with some Trailer-Sailin’ and news talk about SNW, Prodigy, Picard Season 2 and all the other crazy crap that came out on Star Trek day.  You’ll also hear the boys consciously changing their dialects, giving you some AMAZING drink recipes, appreciating Richard Kind and talking skants, skants, SKANTS!  SHUT UP!

Jack (cohost of the APECAST!) gets so excited about the meeting of the classic ape-like Mugatos with villainous laser-whippin’ Ferengis that he has to call Ferengi expert Kregg (obviously!), Barm (as you do) and brother Sam (why not?) to go absolutely APESHIT over this wacky adventure.  In the spirit of the episode, they have plenty of pronunciation problems of their own, while talking the Kzinti, Stephen King, Dark, Australian Tellarites, REFERENCES, What If…, Shang-Chi, and just about every movie currently in theaters.  It’s as sexually arousing as watching two Mugatus go at it.

Sean Davis is back to talk Lower Decks and the return (in very different ways) of both Tom Paris and Shaxs with Jack and Barm, but not before they try to remember any time Tom Cruise has died in a movie.  After that, it’s on to discussing some great Tendi/Mariner material, our feelings on the Shaxs revival, , separating our feelings on Voyager and Tom Paris, the implications of the Pakled threat, mayonnaise as the instigator of the only conflict between Japan and America, and touching tales of the early days of the Jack/Barm alliance.  The listener’s joy from this will EASILY power a FULL-SIZE Dyson Sphere.

The Lower Deckers, when the ApeCast hosted Jaxilly.  Geoff, when Jack referenced LOST.  Boimler, Will and Thomas on Nervala IV.  Jack and Geoff, selecting dub/subs on Amazon Prime.  TNG fans, when Boimler spoke of the D!  Mariner and Jet, in the collector galleries.  The Titan Strike Team, the Pakled snacks uncovered.  Mariner and Boimler, in the Cerritos bar again.  Star Trek Nerds, seeing the Spock Two skeleton.  You, when you heard this episode!

Lower Decks is BACK, and so are the PD Crew (RTW+Barm), and Geoff (The ApeCast), to talk about it!  Or rather, spend a few hours goofing around with each other and occasionally talking about the episode, which is a fine thing including giant heads and Gary Mitchell references.  In other words, we’ve become GODS.  One listen, and you’ll agree: We’re using way too many napkins. 

IT’S THE BOOK BOOK!  Or is it??  Three smart people who are Jack, Barm and Sean put on their glasses for Jaxilly’s third dalliance with the literary Wonderlands of Uma McCormack!  As they catch up on Michael and Book (and Grudge and Indian Desmond)’s adventures between episodes 1 and 2 of Season 3, they’ll also revel in their undying love for Discovery’s Alice in Wonderland references, make an excessive amount of Lord of the Rings references, just start ranting about Discovery plotting some more, and most importantly, check out FOUR Trek Trailers and finally open the mailbag!  This is one Wonderland where you won’t get BURNED.

Get out the Cheeza, because Jack and Kevin have made their third annual musical discovery: Disc-overy, by Tinie Tempah!  They’ve already delved into 70’s British Disco/Rock and early aughts French electronica, why not early teens British hip-hop?  And this time, it’s the first listen-through for both involved.  Will they fancy TT?  Will they ever look at Discs or Ovaries the same way again?  WILL THEY TALK ABOUT EMINEM AND SNOOP DOGG??  Only one way to find out!

Jack and Lauren finally get up in that ass to talk about The Lefty Call, in their fourth annual Jaxilly Curb Your Enthusiasm Extravaganza!  This year, Lauren picks the episode, and she chose to finally give us the gift of Leon in his starmaking moment.  It’s a shitstorm, it’s just shit, as they not only delve into Leon, but also talk about winter fruits, getting eaten by whales, their severe neuroses about toilets, their first Richard Lewis episode also, how many times Jack can say “get up in that ass” and the wonders of the alimentary canal.  GET UP IN THIS ASS, LISTENERS.

The Picard Debut Crew sits down to hang out and do a commentary on Total Recall!  It’s one of the most fun movies ever, and here is the best commentary on it.  We also count down the many, many Star Trek characters who appear in the movie.  ‘Nuff said!  GET YOUR ASS TO THIS COMMENTARY.

In the thrilling conclusion to the last episode, Jack, Sam and Barm talk about another twenty commercials with Star Trek characters in them, and then read some emails and shit.  (Follow along with the gang by checking commercials 22-39 yourself on Jack’s Youtube playlist “Star Trek Character Commercials”)

Jack perverts Sam’s very reasonable idea of watching every commercial they can find of Star Trek actors playing their characters in TV commercials by creating exceptions and watering down the concept until the episode becomes a bloated, overly long mess that needed to be split into two parts to even approach being manageable, yet still manages to be a lot of fun!  Barm is along to assist in this process.  (Follow along with the gang by checking out the first 21 commercials yourself on Jack’s Youtube playlist “Star Trek Character Commercials”)

On this 11th installment (again, not the same 11 you would think), Jack and Kregg are really scraping the bottom of the barrel, as they record a drunken commentary and make jokes about what is already essentially a joke; the fan dub of Episode III called Star war: The Third Gather - Backstroke of the West, based on a bootleg DVD with a Google translated into English version of the Chinese dub script of the film! And Barm is here to join them, kind of! If you want to follow along, look around for a copy because those Youtube ads are gonna SCREW UP YOUR EVENING.

Back through the gate!

John Davidson once again joins Zack and perennial hanger-on Barnacle to finally get back through the Stargate to talk about SeaQuest DSV again, and we got ourselves a doozy here!  That’s right, it’s the one where DAGWOOD IS ON TRIAL FOR MURDER.  As we dive (see what I did there?) deep into some classic season 2 SeaQuest, the boys reminisce on the profound effect Dagwood’s plight had on them as kids, cardboard Santas, the deceptively deep wisdom of Darwin, the old Scheid’/’Side debate, and dish on why SeaQuest might actually be the best show of the whole damn Stargate franchise.  Hop into the gate for some aquatic adventure with the best seamen around!

Sister! Sooooo, Barm has a ….younger sister! This podcast has now betrayed her, too.  Kaela Neufeld makes her Jaxilly debut to talk about one of her (and now our!) favorite books, John Scalzi’s Redshirts!  The Barms and Jack dive into a meta(physical) masterpiece of dry comedy, satire and metafictional tomfoolery, all inspired by classic Trek cannon fodder! Along the way, they’ll dish on some Trek news and open the magic box to chat also about Philip Seymour Hoffman, Long Island, The Orville, Gangs of New York, Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes, yetis on spaceships, and the return of the Outrageous Okona. Jack blathers on about how timespace is an illusion again. Listen and become a part of the narrative!

There’s more to Lauren Petronaci than loving Larry David, Godzilla and lemurs!  She also loves the 1998 Pixar classic A Bug’s Life, and she’s here to talk about it with Jack!  Along the way, they’ll also talk about some other classic Pixar films, planets and the solar system, birds, etymology, the wonderful cast of this movie, size and scale, Madagascar, Godzilla vs. Kong, BUGS of course, and so much more!  Look at all the colors of the …. FUN.

Rike Strike!  Jack and Barm, and making his Trek book castin’ debut, Sean Davis, get together to talk Riker, Picard and the ten pages or so of material in the novel that bear his name, Star Trek: Picard: Dark Veil!  It’s another big boy, as the Riker Boyz gab about the Jazari, the Titan, and Romulans, Romulans, Romulans! They also weigh in on heady topics, like the continuity of culturally accepted emotional displays, conspiracy theories and their disruptive effect on culture (and whether that’s fun to read about or not), 1995 PC games, childhood, and FISH.  Riker didn’t steer us wrong, and he won’t steer you wrong either.   

Had enough of the Emerald Chain and the Burn madness? Why not take a little dip into some cool refreshing Picard comic waters with Jack and Barm, where the only things you·ll have to worry about are what ships in 2365 look like, how much like Yul Brynner Picard looks, how much like Napoleon Dynamite Raffi looks, and what two idiots asking Alexa questions on a podcast looks like. Looks like a short silly ep where Jack had to go to work! 

It’s a Disco Party, and Jack has invited a cadre of glorious guests to celebrate his newfound freedom from the pressures of endlessly podcasting about Star Trek every week.  Barm, Sam Stovold (Marvel Star Wars Explorers), Sean Davis (After the Credits), Kregg Castillo (Golden Boy?), Richard Dunham (Ghibli Minute), and an Ape-on in the form of Geoff Clarke (The ApeCast), are all here to dish on the finale and their thoughts on Season 3 in general.  This megasize episode is more exciting than the BURN, and will surely resonate throughout subspace for all eternity.