How To Stop Wanting Him Back

I am fired up about this episode because just this week I had not one, but two clients break the no contact rule and they reached out to their exes. It happens to the best of us. And really, falling off the wagon at some point is going to happen to all of us. Healing your heart isn’t easy, and at some point, we all slip up and go back to what is familiar. The key is to be on to ourselves and be aware of the thoughts that cause us to take the actions we do. In this episode, I detail what happened with my clients, how I coached them to identify why they wanted to reach out to their exes in the first place, and how they move through this in order to continue healing their hearts.This is just some of the work that I do with my clients in my one-year coaching program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. This work is hard, and in order to truly heal your heart and find someone better, you need a coach that will be on to your thoughts, see your blindspots, and call you out, with love, when you veer off tr

As a life coach, I think there is this perception that because I have the skills of thought work, have committed to doing the work, and teach it to others, that I have mastered my mind. In this episode I want to be really vulnerable and share with you that I have been really sad recently, and it took me a long time to figure out why. What makes self-coaching so difficult is that it is nuanced, and that is why I continue to get coached. Join me as I share with you the process I went through to identify what was making me sad and how I’m showing up for myself through this time. Sometimes our work is to allow the sadness and really create space for our feelings. Other times our work is to move away from the sadness, change our thoughts, and really shift our mood. And honestly, it can be difficult to know how to make the right call and know which is best. This is why I highly recommend getting a coach. In my program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, you get access to a library of over 60 videos wher

How do we know when we are really over our ex and ready to find someone better? A lot of times we tell ourselves that in order to really close the book on our heartbreak, we need closure. We need for that person to tell us how sorry they are for whatever has happened, and once we get that from them, we’ll be ready to let go and move on. What if you could get closure without them? This is something I was working on with a client this week and in this episode, I share with you how we can redefine closure, create it for ourselves, and live our best lives, no matter what. Closure is step three in my five step process in order to create the results of stop wanting Mr. Wrong back, fall in love with yourself, and find someone better. If you are interested in taking your love life and your entire life to the next level, I invite you to join my one-year group coaching program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. With me as your coach, I teach you to cultivate awareness and get to the crux of your thoughts,

Over some of the recent episodes of this show, I have talked about the importance of cutting contact with your ex, and why it is the first step in my five-steps of how to heal your heart. Let’s say you have done the difficult thing of cutting contact and blocking them, but your Mr. or Ms. Wrong is finding a way to still get in contact with you. If you’re like my client Jane, you may be feeling anxious when they call, but when they aren’t calling, you’re feeling anxious then too. You’re torn, and confused, and not sure how to handle all these feelings. In this episode, we really investigate how you can examine your thoughts and anxiety, and how to move through this pain in order to continue healing your heart and find someone better.If cutting contact feels too difficult for you, I would say that is an excellent reason for getting coached, and why my program is exactly what you need. In Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, I teach you the skills of the thought work and coach you through the pain. I w

Let’s talk about our ability to receive. This topic comes from a coaching client who recently came to our coaching and shared that she is finding it really difficult to receive a gift that was offered to her. When we dig into the hard work of upleveling ourselves and healing our hearts, I have seen with many of my clients that the universe recognizes the work and provides abundance and opportunity. However, because of the heartbreak we’ve experienced, it’s not always easy to lean into the opportunity and be able to receive what is being offered. In this episode, I walk you through how to take inventory of where you may be over-giving to others, where you should give to yourself, and how to receive the love you deserve. There is a reason you haven’t found Mr. Right yet. If you want to get coached to stop wanting Mr. Wrong, fall in love with you, and find someone better, apply to join my one-year coaching program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. This program has over 60 videos, weekly group coach

Let’s talk about triggers. In the world of dating, there are more than just two types of triggers, but for the purpose of this episode, we will be focusing on two: the kind you have when are dating Mr. Wrong and the kind you have when you are dating Mr. Right. This episode was inspired by a recent coaching call with a client who is starting to date again, and is really interested in this guy she’s dating, even when there are triggers for her that he may not be the Mr. Available she wants him to be. Triggers and fear are both totally normal, even when you are dating or even in a relationship with Mr. or Ms. Right. In this episode, we take a look at the different types of triggers, how to identify and call out problematic behavior, and how to love yourself through the fear and through those moments of being triggered. You deserve a reciprocal relationship of love, consistency, effort, and commitment. The question that comes down to you is, are you willing to lean in and do the work so that you can live in the r

Your thoughts, create feelings, which drive results. This is the model I use as a coach and when I get coached. In this episode, I share with you just how important your feelings are, and how they can shape your results. Let’s take a look at how you may not be fully loving yourself right now, what this means for your love life, those you are attracting, and how to investigate the feelings that may be driving your actions. This work is so much deeper than simply getting over Mr. Wrong. If you are ready to get started and apply to join my one-year group coaching program, go to https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/. I truly believe this is the work that I am meant to do. In this group coaching, there are over 60 videos on how to stop wanting Mr. Wrong, fall the fuck in love with you, and call in Mr. Right. If you are willing to commit to this work, I can’t wait to see you inside. Topics in this episodeExamining the type of love we attractWhat it looks like to date yourselfHow emotional pain is manifestedT

I am so excited for the full launch of my one-year group coaching, which starts this Friday, April 9th. For this episode, I have asked three students who took advantage of the opportunity to join early to come on the podcast and talk about what it has been like for them to get coached in this way and why it works. You’ll hear from each of them as they share why they joined the program, what it’s like to be in the group setting, and what the work looks like for each of them. I am so honored to have these women on the podcast and to be their coach.If you are ready to get started and make the commitment to heal your heart, fall in love with you, and find someone better, subscribe to my website to get all the details https://clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/.Topics in this episodeGrowth is hard. But it’s also hard to be stuck in your heartbreak.Identifying ways you may be hating on yourself“It feels like everyone is getting married”Gaining confidence in being heartbroken and moving through the heartbreakHow easy it i

I was recently working with two clients who were going through the same thing; their Mr. Unavailable’s are in new relationships, and from the outside, it looks like they are now Mr. Available to their new partners, and are now able to give the best of themselves in the new relationships. Even in my own dating history, I can look back and see examples of men who committed to new partners and were able to give them everything I wanted. In this episode, let’s take a deeper look into this thought. Is everything what it seems? Does it matter? And how does this create the container to be able to find who is right for you?The work starts with you. The three results you will get from my coaching are to stop wanting him back, fall authentically in love with you, and find someone better. If you are ready to take this to the next level, my group coaching officially launches on April 9th. If you are a current student of my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, and want to upgrade to the one-year group co

Having hope is very tricky. How many times have you been looking forward to a date, but then stopped yourself from “getting your hopes up”? This happened recently when I was working with a client. When she told me she didn’t want to get her hopes up for a first date, I asked her why the hell not? It is so natural to have hope, but there are also times when hope doesn’t serve us. I share with you how to tell the difference between when hope is helpful, versus when it isn’t, and how you should apply this to create the result of finding your person.I also want to remind you that my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better is going away very soon and will be replaced by my one-year group coaching program with the same name. If you are a current course student, you have a window of time between now and April 9th, to upgrade to the one-year group coaching program. You even get early access to the group coaching calls! To take advantage of this opportunity, send an email to hello@clairetheheartbreakcoac

Have you ever gone on a date and been worried about saying or doing the wrong thing? I was recently working with a client who asked the question, “what if I do the wrong thing, or do something embarrassing, and he was supposed to be my person?” That coaching call inspired this episode where we take a look at how we define right and wrong, and how that affects our ability to create the result of finding our person. I share with you some examples of things from my own dating history of right versus wrong, what I learned, and how it all lead me to calling in love and my dream man.Some of the topics I cover in this episode are also a preview to some of the topics I cover in my course, and in my one-year coaching program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, launching April 9th. The three results I deliver to you in this program are to stop wanting Mr. or Ms. Wrong back, and loving yourself on the next level so that you can attract a next-level partner. To get my course, which is going away very soon, go

With the rise in self-improvement in our culture, and particularly on social media, I have seen a lot of content around this idea of positivity, and the idea that we have to always be positive in order to achieve the life that we want. But I want to call that out! Guess what? Positivity isn’t always the answer, and that’s especially true when we’re heartbroken and looking to heal. We can serve our hearts so much more when we honestly take a look at our thoughts, love ourselves, then begin the work of healing from a place of awareness. This is the exact work I take my clients through in my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, which will be going away very shortly! Launching April 9th, I will be offering a one-year group coaching program, and it is absolutely the best offer I can give to anybody. You will have access to all the videos in my course, plus three opportunities a week to get coached by me, plus additional videos! To be one of the first to sign up for this offering, subscribe to my

We all have those moments, those vivid memories from relationships with our exes that make us question ourselves. On a recent group coaching call that I offered to students of my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, a client shared one of the times this happened to her and asked the question, “Why does he think I’m a monster?” In this episode, we explore the stories we create for ourselves, based on how we feel our partners think about us. I share some examples from my own dating history, how I take ownership of the role that I played, and how we also get to create the thoughts that serve us. And from there, how to do the work of recommitting our brains in order to create the result of finding someone better. Be sure to listen through to the end of this episode so you can get the low down on my new offer, coming soon!And for lifetime access to my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, go to: https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/.  Topics in this episodeApproaching a pa

I want to take you through a recent coaching call I had with a client. She kept believing this story that her unavailable ex was everything that she wanted, and that all the qualities she had on paper for her ideal person, her ex checked every box. My loves, I know so many of you also hold on to this same thought. Let’s take a look at what is on your list of what you want your ideal person to have, get clear on why those are things on your list, and why your ex doesn’t actually fit on that piece of paper. And yes, I do mean an actual sheet of paper. Let’s get you over your ex, and find someone better.To take this work to the next level, get my course Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, which is available for a limited time only. Once you purchase the course, you have lifetime access to the four modules where you learn what you need to succeed, how to stop wanting him back, falling in love with you, and finding someone better. Also, be sure to subscribe to my website, https://clairetheheartbreakcoac

Ten years ago today, I was experiencing rock bottom. I was underweight, didn’t really have a place to call home, and I was right in the middle of my worst breakup, and I still had dinner with him. All I wanted was for him to make me feel better. Ten years ago today, I didn’t have the tools that I have now in order to make myself feel better, love the fuck out of myself, and call in my ideal person. But now I do, and I want to share them with you.I want to share with you the 11 truths that have gotten me to the place I am now, where I am the happiest, most abundant, most at peace, and most in love I have ever been in my life. I have experienced a fuck ton of heartbreak, have done a fuck ton of healing, and so much has changed for me to reach this upleveled version of myself. In this episode, I offer to you what I wish I had ten years ago, important lessons I have learned along the way, and remind you that you are more than capable of creating these kinds of results for you, too.And if you’re looking to take th

This episode was inspired by an episode from a podcast I love, Date/Able, hosted by Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu. In this episode, they were reviewing bad advice from dating coaches, and one of the pieces of bad advice is when coaches give their clients the advice of, “You deserve better”. I’m happy to say that I am on the same page as these hilarious and brilliant women, and I want to dive a little deeper into this thought of, “I deserve better”. There are times when this can possibly be a helpful thought and other times when it just doesn’t serve you. I take you through how to investigate this thought for yourself and see if it’s working for you.To take this investigation into your thoughts, and the results they are creating to the next level, check out my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. One of my favorite sections is the Fall In Love With You section, and in it, we do the work of healing and falling in love with you, so that you can find your right person who will mirror that love you

First things first, let’s celebrate 100 episodes! Before I started this podcast, I said to my business coach that I wasn’t sure if I could come up with a lot of topics around heartbreak. But here we are, 100 episodes later! Along the way, I have helped so many with healing their relationships with themselves, taught you how to call in the love of your life, and how to live your whole life to its fullest potential.We’re really diving deep into what thought work looks like; what are the right thoughts, what are the wrong thoughts, and how to really investigate and get to the root beliefs that are holding you back from creating the results you are looking for. This is where coaching really comes in. There’s nothing like getting coached by someone who really sees what the root of your issue is and takes you through the process of doing the work to release those beliefs, heal your heart, and call love in.If this language is totally foreign to you, I highly recommend that you get my course, Stop Wanting Him Back an

Have you been listening to this podcast for a while, been doing the work on cleaning up your thoughts and you still haven’t found Mr. or Ms. Right? I’m sharing a few of the thoughts that clients and listeners have shared with me that have revealed why they still haven’t found their person. Remember, your thoughts create your results. It is your thinking that has lead you to the result of not finding him or her yet. And that also means that when you identify what it is that’s holding you back, and you shift your thoughts, you can call love in.If this resonates with you and you want to dive deeper into doing the healing and the work it takes to find your person, I highly recommend you take my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. In my course, I take you through the process of getting over your ex, healing your heart, falling in love with you, and finding someone better. This course has over 60 videos to help you step-by-step do the work, and truly, find someone better.Topics in this episodeAns

This episode is inspired by one of my amazing clients. When she came to me, she was heartbroken over a douchebag, and now, after we’ve worked together and she has put in a lot of work, she still finds herself missing her ex, as is the case with a lot of heartbroken women. In this episode, I share with you why missing your ex isn’t actually a problem, how to identify when it is a problem, and questions to ask yourself and reflect on in order to move through it.There is so much information in this episode, but it doesn’t even begin to cover how I can help you heal your heart. In my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, I take you through the step-by-step process of doing the thought work, getting over your ex, falling in love with you, and finding someone better. So if you’re looking to take this work to the next level, go to my website where you can find my course, and also apply for my one-on-one six month coaching program.Topics in this episodeIf missing him causes you pain, is that actually

How many times have you been swiping on the apps, or gone on a first date and thought, “oh my god, this is my person”? I hear that so often from clients and have even felt that in my dating life in the past! The truth is, you’re “all in” to the idea of your person, and it’s not bad to be in your feels and into the idea of this person. However, it can put added pressure on a situation and won’t help you find Mr. or Ms. Right. In this episode, I share examples from clients, possible outcomes of this mindset, and how to show up differently in your dating life.For more help with showing up differently in your dating life, I teach you how to heal your heart, fall in love with you, and find someone better through both my one-on-one coaching and also through my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. I only have a couple of one-on-one coaching spots, which will be available in mid to late February. To lock down your spot, submit your application here. Topics in this episodeStaying open to someone even