Welcome To Patchwork

We're back for Season 8 baby! To kick it all off, Christian takes aim at Josh for giving him 1 hour to confirm he was available for a catchup before making other plans. Josh tell us about his frustration at some unsaved numbers in a friendly WhatsApp thread which leads us to ask - when should you add someone as a contact in your phone? What makes a person worthy of contact status? After exploring what the threshold is for saving them, we then look at what makes us delete a number from our phone? Finally we explore what's needed to transition a work colleague into a friend?   After trying to recruit players for their AFL7s team, Christian and Dion kick off the conversation around when an item you own can no longer be considered new? Is it about the price of the item? Maybe it's about how long you're planning on owning it for. Is something no longer new just because it's dirty? What about buying a used item? Do you introduce it as your 'new used' product? When do you start using your new product like a normal p

As summer heats up (or you're listening to this in winter and have got the heater on really high), it's time we taught you how to beat the heat! We start by talking about the moment we 'know summer has arrived', the ozone layer and how we fixed the whole CFC thing?!! Right? Dion then takes us through UV ratings, we talk methods for applying sunscreen and asking people to rub sunscreen into your back. We then look at the factors that inform how we dress on a warm day, looking for the perfect amount of sun and Christian ponders 'what is beach?' Finally, we deep dive into the ways we stay cool when feeling hot - wet face washers, spritz on the face, rolling to the cool side of the bed, perfect positioning of your fan, billowing linen clothing.    We also play Patchwork of the Day and Time To Think Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off

Grab a handful of canvas bags and a gold coin because Welcome to Patchwork is teaching you how to go grocery shopping.What prompts you to go grocery shopping? How do you manage your shopping list? What's your shopping strategy once you step foot inside the supermarket? If you lose the person you're with, how do you find them? Should you ever shop on an empty stomach? This Patch is full of big questions with tiny answers. In fact, the answers are so small you can barely hear them. What you will hear is Christian taking Josh and Dion through his jazz shopping; Josh reflecting on his Dad's 'late night shopping' escapades and Dion's obsession with the price of raspberries.We also play Scrolling Through Time and Really GoodFollow us on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast

In Patch 111, we rip the sticky tape off our cardboard packaging and chat all things recycling. We begin by asking ourselves why we recycle. Is it for the environment? Or is it to avoid the scorn of others? We explore why Josh goes through his housemate's rubbish, the magic and mystery of where our rubbish goes and the history of our attitude towards recycling. We then shift gears and talk about buying and selling secondhand goods, product lifecycles, the necessary inclusions of an online ad and giving away products to people who care. Finally, Dion adds another exceptional story into the annals of Patchwork history that involves an ex-AFL player and a bar fridge. We also play Sound Check (Soft Drinks). Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSupport the show: https://www.patreon.com

In Patch 110, we cloak our jackets, skip the queue and talk all things waiting in line. We start by exploring each of our first instincts when approaching a line. Josh establishes the core types of line: single, mess and multi-stream, whilst Christian declares himself a Line Captain. Is Dion cutthroat? Does he call out a line cutter? We discuss some of the best, worst and most embarrassing lines. Josh flips the narrative and tells us about his experience as a cowboy bartender who needs to wrangle lines. Finally we consider the forgotten line, the telephone queue and Christian rages out against people who try engaging in meaningful line chit-chat. We also debut a new game, Team Of The Century (Pencil Case edition) and play Oh Wow. Watch this episode on YouTube: youtube.com/watch?v=eJLwchwFfJ8 Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off we

In Patch 109, we roll around in the mud, feed from the trough and eventually discuss all things clutter and collectibles.We start by exploring how to best hide clutter in your very own home. Whether it's in piles, hidden in storage containers or blocking a robot vacuum, our clutter manifests in very different forms. But what even is a pile? And what is a container, if not simply a place to store your piles. We then dive into sentimental clutter. Can it ever be thrown out given the memories it evokes? Can a photo of the item still hold that same sentimental value? Josh poses the question to Dion and Josh - can you ask housemates to chip in on a purchase for the house. As usual, Christian and Dion attempt to rip Josh apart. Finally, we talk about collections and what weird things we've accumulated over time.We also play Wheel of Fortune Cookie and Time To Think.Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month yo

BUMP! In Patch 108, we make sure our phone credit is topped up as we step into the world of text messaging. Josh encourages Christian and Dion to become cryptographers as we try to text-spell famous abbreviations; we dissect swiping on a keyboard and many other methods for typing; Christian admires how young people use their phones; Josh encourages us to soften our tone; Christian wonders when he should abandon hope for a response to a text message and Dion tries to uncover the best way to remind someone they've haven't responded to a question. We also play Copy Cat (horse walking into gallop into neigh) and a new game, "Gimme The Line!"Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.co

From preparing the night before to cuffing your sleeves, Patch 107 covers the gamut of a morning dress up routine. Josh talks us through the first thing he does in the morning before putting on clothes; Christian explores the relationship between wearing nice clothes and being productive and Dion explains why he wears an elastic band as a bracelet. Josh stuns us with the structures and systems he has implemented in his life, Christian explores his 7-day cycle and Dion begs us to consider the rule, "there's a hat for everyone". We also check in about accessorizing and clothing flair.We also play Hi Team and an old favourite, Really Good. Click here to watch Patch 107 on YouTubeSearch for us on social media to see clips of the show: We're on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook. linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac

Please keep your seatbelts fastened for Patch 106 as we teach you how to enjoy a flight! We start by covering what we pack in our carry on: Josh is obsessed with charging his devices, Dion has an interesting kind of neck pillow and Christian reflects on a magical moment with a reclining Italian man. We then look at what we first do to settle into the flight: where do you put your feet? do you think about what films you'll watch? We also discuss how much water we drink during the flight and the hotly contested, best seat on the plane. Finally, Christian vents about his broken dreams of getting drunk on a flight with very attentive crew. We also do a quick Soundcheck (Dog Breeds) and play Time To Think.Click here to watch Patch 106 on YouTubeSearch for us on social media to see clips of the show: We're on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook. linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.

We all enjoy eating at restaurants. But have you ever really thought about how or why we choose those restaurants? In this Patch, we dive into some of the key considerations that go into picking a restaurant. Are you swayed by spruikers throwing in a glass of wine? Will you pick a 'feed me' option? Do you care about the name of the restaurant? In this episode, Josh expresses his love for menus stuck to the front window of a restaurant, Christian vents about the 'please wait to be seated' sign and Dion talks about dietary requirements (again).We also play Oh Wow Of the Week (OWOW) and Nursery Rhymes. Search for us on social media to see clips of the show: We're on Instagram, YouTube, Tiktok, Twitter and Facebook. linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatch

We navigate the difficult questions and considerations around walking through doors. First door in our line of sight is the revolving door. After dissecting some of the nuances of entering one of the revolving door 'slices', we look at some of the other classic doors: sliding doors, fly-screens, car doors, van doors and the enigmatic turnstiles and plastic strips at the front of milkbars. After talking about our favourite types of doors, we move onto key chains and the keys you carry. Finally, we address the etiquette of holding the door open for others.We also play Copy Cat and Patchword of the Day.Search for us on social media to see clips of the show: We're on Instagram, Twitter, Tiktok and Facebook. linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnyst

Should you wish someone happy birthday in a group thread if you've already wished them happy birthday in your own separate thread. We also ponder what questions you should ask someone on their birthday. Plus Christian reveals how many of his childhood birthdays were spent at Crown: A World of Entertainment. Plus find out if you can give Gordon's Gin as a present! Search for us on social media to see clips of the show: We're on Instagram, Twitter, Tiktok and Facebook. linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week we give you the indispensable instruction manual on how to properly try shoes, clothes and cars. Dion gives us a surprise Roobois Challenge, and Christian writes the rulebook for when you can return items to a store.Search for us on social media to see clips of the show: We're on Instagram, Twitter, Tiktok and Facebook. linktr.ee/welcometopatchworkFor a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch in our off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dion, Christian and Josh are back for Season 7! Join the boys as they cast their minds all the way back to Episode 1 nearly five years ago. They discuss their updated 2022 insecurities, Dion gives an update on his never-ending revolving door of hairdressers, and of course, what they are now Doyens of. Plus old school games ”Monotoly” and Really Good! Remember to follow us on social media inc YouTube, Instagram, Twitter and Facebook and head to Patreon for bonus content: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Patch 100 was recorded LIVE at Brunswick Ballroom on April 9 2022 as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Josh confronts Dion about something he noticed whilst editing the podcast, we prioritise hellos and goodbyes and finally, discuss making room for dessert. We were also joined on stage by very special guests Meshel Laurie and Daniel Connell to talk stealing shopping trollies and kissing your mother on the lips. A big big thank you to everyone who attended the live show! We had so much fun. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

After months of radio silence, Christian, Dion and Josh are on the mend and ready to return. We wanted to record a quick update to let you know what we've been up to the last few months and our plans to return for Season 7.Thank you for holding down the fort. We're back!... That is our seat though. Yeah. The one you're sitting on. Yeah. We were sitting on it just before we left. Yeah but it doesn't matter that we've been gone for 3 months - we left our glass there. We were always going to come back and sit there again. Are you seriously not going to get up? Fine. It doesn't matter. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For the second week running, to whet your appetite for this year's Melbourne International Comedy Festival, here's a walk down memory lane to Show 2 last year. Get your tickets to this year's show (Sat 9 April at 1pm) here! https://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2022/shows/welcome-to-patchwork-100th-episodeRecorded LIVE on April 18, 2021 at Comedy Republic as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.Is it acceptable to leave a live event early? What should you do if you stop next to someone you know at the traffic lights? What are you responsibilities to others when leaving a room?With very special guests, Oh Wow of the week, Scrolling Through Time, Wheel of Fortune Cookie, DJ Drop from Prince Phillip's Funeral and of course, your Really Goods! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We're performing our 100th episode live show baby! Listen to this short little trailer while booking tickets to our bloody show. With special guests comedians Meshel Laurie and Daniel Connell! Also jump on any of our social media channels to see this audio recording brought to life in 4-DIMENSIONAL video: https://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2022/shows/welcome-to-patchwork-100th-episode We cannot wait for this. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

To whet your appetite for this year's Melbourne International Comedy Festival, here's a walk down memory lane to Show 1 last year. Get your tickets for this year's show (Sat 9 April at 1pm) here: https://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2022/shows/welcome-to-patchwork-100th-episodeRecorded LIVE on April 11, 2021 at Comedy Republic as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.What time does a host need to arrive to their event? Should you pause your conversation when a waiter begins to set your table? What's your favourite style of chopping? With very special guests, Oh Wow of the week, Forgive Me Father, Patchword of the Day and of course, your Really Goods! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchworkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Christian received a wonderful compliment while riding his bike and he was thoroughly chuffed. He tells us about how chuffed he was. Megachuffed. Josh has big issues with message reactions. What was wrong with a good 'haha' or a 'lol' - there's too many options now and it's an absolute disgrace. Does reacting to a message signify simple acknowldgement or is it rude and dismissive?We also discuss if you should always go and visit a friends 'new place' and what you're looking out for when visiting. Who's responsibility is it to organise the 'checking out' of the new place, the mover inner, or the friend who wants to see the new place?With very special guest 'Oh Wow' and 'Time to Think'.Don't forget - Our huge 100th Episode special live recording at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival is on sale now!Josh also has two Game Boys shows on sale as well 'Escape to the Megaverse' and 'Hey Hey It's The Butterfly Club'! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.Support the show: https://www.pat