Body Counts And Beer

Just in time to be several days late for Halloween, it's the conclusion of our sPoOoOoOkY lineup of "action" films! We're closing out the season of ghouls and ghosts with NEITHER OF THOSE THINGS! Instead, we're taking a look at the 1986 Stephen King gem MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE! There's so much to talk about, we probably missed some stuff, but here's what we didn't miss: Mark discusses his only trip to a strip club, Patrick's undying love for Carl Buddig lunch meats, WE MADE YOU!, the glory of AC/DC, a dissection of curse words, MORE WE MADE YOU!, some part of this dumb movie, and the blessed return of WAR CRIMES! Please subscribe with iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play, or pretty much any podcatcher you desire. Leave us a rating and review so we can print them up and send them as Christmas cards! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodycountsandbeer@gmail.com Let us know what you liked, what you disliked, what made you sever

We did it! The glass ceiling on typical minisodes has been shattered! Instead of discussing something tangentially related to our full episode next week, we're discussing something CLOSELY related to our full episode next week. Join us as we review the BATSHIT INSANE trailer for Steven King's MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE! How do we stretch a review of a two minute trailer to fifteen minutes? Glad you asked! A brief discussion of Guns 'N Roses leads to Patrick revealing his bias against fondant! We offer terrible and unsolicited dating advice! We spend an inordinate amount of time discussing the IMDb of Mark Hamill! Then we FINALLY BEGIN! PLUS: An ominous portent of things to befall Jon Rooney! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so we can finally afford that sweet Squarespace website we've had our eye on! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/

HAPPY (almost) HALLOWEEN and more importantly: WE'RE SORRY! This week, we're discussing the 2004 "movie" VAMPIRES VS. ZOMBIES (also known as CARMILLA, THE LESBIAN VAMPIRE), a "film" that is basically impossible to find without streaming it illegally or paying the director a large sum of money. Why are we doing this? Because Jon made us, that's why! This movie keeps introducing subplots up until the one hour mark! As such, we start with all the terrible reviews and go downhill from there: the General's Elbow of Justice! A reenactment of Francis Ford Coppola making Sofia star in Godfather III! SO MANY DUMB ACCENTS! Schrob Rombie vs. Ron Zombie! One of the stars of this movie was kicked out of an oceanographic institute due to "forbidden research" on dolphin communication! We speculate on the origin of director Vince D'Amato! GHOST CAR! And once again, the return of Favorite Mall Restaurants! PLUS: introducing your favorite Dropkick Murphy's ripoff band - THE CROSS BODY BLOCK O'NEILL'S! Please subscribe wit

HAPPY (almost) HALLOWEEN! Get your fun-size candy bars and individually wrapped choco-glue-logs ready for another special minisode of Body Counts and Beer! Next week, we'll be tackling the little seen "horror" film VAMPIRES VS. ZOMBIES, so this week, it seems only fair we pay tribute to the schlocky goodness that inspired it. Settle in as we run through our FAVORITE BEST WORST MOVIES! Jon can't quite remember his name! Mark reveals his Ed Wood story! A rundown of the Prophecy series that somehow DOESN'T feature a myriad of Walken impressions! Patrick recounts how he met an angel who led him to watch Omega Code 2! We takes turns crapping on Rocky Horror! All this and PAUL HARVEY! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so more people listen, so we can score some of those sweet, sweet Casper mattress bucks! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycounts

GET OVER HERE! Now that I have both a harpoon in your chest AND your attention, have you heard the good word about Mortal Kombat? If not, strap in bucko, because we're discussing our FAVORITE MORTAL KOMBAT CHARACTERS! We recorded this before our unplanned hiatus, but you can be sure that everything contained within is still within range of its best buy date! This week, Mark disparages Full Metal Alchemist and Cowboy Bebop and Anime in general before being taught a lesson! Jon drops mad Mortal Kombat ninja knowledge and somehow ties it into Prince! Someone yells "TOASTY!" Plus, we share our trademarked recipe for digital homunculi! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so more people listen, so we can score some of those sweet, sweet Mack Weldon bucks! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodycountsandbeer@gmail.com Let

TOASTY! We're back...again! Since we made you wait so long, we're dropping TWO CASTS IN ONE DAY! What manner of madness is this? Have we seen into the colour without shape and been driven insane by the Shoggoth? Nope! We just watched Mortal Kombat, which some philosophers would consider one in the same. There's not a lot of ground to cover in a movie about idiots fighting goons, so we did the best with what we had! Jon once again stumps for Hackers, Patrick remembers Outback Steakhouse all wrong, all the a cappella Mortal Kombat theme and Steely Dan you can handle, a belated tribute to Len Wein, a belated tribute to Walter Becker, Mel Gibson stops by, and of course, the return of Favorite Mall Restaurants! Please subscribe with iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play, or pretty much any podcatcher you desire. Leave us a rating and review so we can trade them for loose squares! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodycount

DAAAAAAAAAAAMN! I'm sure that was loud enough to be heard throughout digital Manhattan. Now that's I've got your attention, have you heard the good news about TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES: THE MOVIE!? It's from 1990 and stars Corey Feldman kind of! Join us as we attempt to navigate a childhood touchstone that's neither as good as we remember or as bad as it should be! We touch on everything this week: Richard Nixon: Cosmic Monster, Shredder's management technique, Jon doesn't like when people quote Archer, Mark doesn't like Jose Canseco, an elegy for answering machines, how cool 70s rock and roll stories have become horror stories, and Jon once again mansplains audio/visual components! Plus, we debut our new spinoff podcast: SPIDER-TALK! Please make sure to vaccinate your children against Master of Disguise. Stay tuned for a special promo for Season 2 of one of our favorite podcasts, Spiel Chicago. Hosted by Smyra Yawn, Spiel Chicago explores the feminist and progressive work of Chicago's theatre scene.

Cowabunga! Radical! Bossa Nova! Chevy Nova? Next week, we're finally tackling the 1990 classic TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES: THE MOVIE. As such, our corresponding minisode this week is about our FAVORITE NINJA TURTLE! It was such an easy, lowest common denominator choice, we almost had to make it! Putting aside that Raphael is both objectively AND subjectively the greatest half-shelled hero of all, we take a moment to discuss the remaining pizza chomping teens. Along the way, we welcome back Macho Man Randy Savage and his spinoff podcast: SUPREME COURT SLAM! Plus, Mark blows a kiss at the end. You're welcome. Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so we have new reading material while we're on the can! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodycountsandbeer@gmail.com Let us know what you liked, what you hated, what gave yo

Looking for sound gambling advice? Always bet on black, and when it comes to Wesley Snipes, always bet on Drop Zone! This week, we hoped for aerial action film lightning to strike twice with PASSENGER 57, and boy howdy, were we let down. Listen as we do everything in our power to talk about anything other than Passenger 57, such as: holding an unnecessarily long discussion about Friendly's and what constitutes a national restaurant chain, Mark gets diet advice which evolves into rice advice, a PSA for Swamp Ass Awareness featuring The Hoff and K.I.T.T., our new spinoff podcast "Gravy Fight," and Mark puts a stop to yet another "here's all the French I know" bits. PLUS: We cannot for the life of us separate villain Charles Rane with actor Bruce Payne. Sorry Bruce. Stay tuned for a special promo for Season 2 of one of our favorite podcasts, Spiel Chicago. Hosted by Smyra Yawn, Spiel Chicago explores the feminist and progressive work of Chicago's theatre scene. For more info, check out their website at https

VRRROOOOOM! That's the sound planes make, right? No? It's cars? Are you sure? Yes, you are? Okay then. Too late to go back now. Get ready for all the wings, engines, tiny windows and recycled air you can handle! This week, we're discussing our FAVORITE MOVIE PLANES! There's a lot to cover this week so JUST KIDDING! Turns out, most planes are pretty much just planes, so this week we meander a bit more than usual while we: make distinctions between the Gremlin from Twilight Zone and the Gremlins from Gremlins, discover the secret origins of KY Muscle Grease, distract and interrupt the classiest introduction we've ever had, make distinctions between the Mogwai from Gremlins and the Gremlins from Gremlins, and break the time/space continuum by discussing the Slimer Sundae. Plus, planes from Hitchcock, Spielberg and Miller. Also, stick around for a special promo for Season 2 of Spiel Chicago, a podcast about women and genderqueer artists in Chicago theatre. For more info, check out their website at: https://spi

We were supposed to watch Passenger 57. Mistakes were made. Top men were put on the job. Top. Men. And those top men were Jackie Chan, John Cusack and Adrien Brody, stars of the surprisingly enjoyable DRAGON BLADE, the best last minute replacement movie we've ever seen! This one starts strange, gets stranger, mellows out a bit, then goes off the rails, all by minute two! Jon still has a cold and his medicine has weird side effects, Mark spoils the beginning of Rocky IV, we nail an extended riff on piano-based rock and rollers from the 70s, the greatest Car Talk guys impression ever rears its glorious head, we got one shitty parrot, AJA!, and Jon forgets the name of the podcast he's currently recording. NOTE: Sorry for the incessant sounds of summer behind us. It was too hot in the "studio" to close the windows. Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so we know for certain we're not Earth's last inhab

We're sorry. We can't believe it has taken us so long to get here: 36 episodes, 30 minisodes, 4 bonus episodes, and one weird, one-off audio sketch, and yet not until now have we taken the time to pay tribute to our FAVORITE MARTIAL ARTS ACTORS! Not named Bruce Lee of course. Because otherwise we would have all picked Bruce Lee. And we can only talk about Kareem Abdul-Jabbar's dope "Game of Death" sunglasses for so long. Join us as we recount in awe the prowess of Tony Jaa, Jackie Chan and JCVD himself! Jon has a cold, which somehow make him forget the Konami Code! Patrick picks his favorite, which Mark basically hijacks because deep down it was his favorite too! Mark picks a guy who only made two good movies, but one of them has a thrown baby elephant, so it's okay! PLUS: Jon reveals his secret hip-hop crush! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave a rating and review so we can make it into the next edition of the Who's Who

We failed. We sought to wash the bad taste of Street Fighter: The Movie out of our mouths with a superior Van Damme flick. Instead, we watched the Cannon Film Group hunk o' cinematic poo CYBORG. It's absolutely one of the worst films we've watched for this podcast, and we are not happy about that one bit. Listen as we cover any and every base we can: the hubris of Cannon Film Group, the exact percentage of screaming in Cyborg, some jangling keys, the return of Coke Guy, the debut issue of the Pirate Gazette, Jon goes out of his way to anger all Final Fantasy fans, we elevate some Denny's cuisine in the name of filling time, and once again, we unleash the Bonus Bullet Point FAVORITE MALL RESTAURANT! Plus: Mark doesn't know how cocaine works and Jon somehow finds a way to bring up Star Wars. Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so we can get the confidence to ask Woman McLadyPerson to the Big Dance! F

Next week we're watching the 1989 JCVD/Cannon Film Group junkfire CYBORG! As such, we're devoting this week's very special minisode to our FAVORITE MOVIE POST-APOCALYPSES! And, believe it or not, shit gets weird REAL QUICK! We begin with a visit from our old pals Werner Herzog and David Bowie, then Jon wimps out and chooses the easy Post-Apocalypse, then Patrick goes insane and chooses the worst Costner Post- Apocalypse, then Mark laments Jon choosing the easy Post-Apocalypse because he wanted it. PLUS: a true cavalcade of stars stops by, including Mel Gibson, Russell Crowe and the famous cross-dimensional wrestling superstar Macho Man! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, because stars make us feel like fancy restaurants! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodycountsandbeer@gmail.com Let us know what you liked, what

HADOUKEN! SONIC BOOM! TIGER KNEE! Grab a roll of quarters and head down to the nearest arcade, because anything you play there will be better than the 1994 JCVD craptacular STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE! That's right: even Aerosmith's Revolution X is better than this hunk o' trash! We cover everything even tangentially related to this "film": Mark's favorite Three Dog Night song, a list of fast food franchises, Jon debuts his new spinoff "Real Answers to Dumb Questions," a timely Music Man reference, a three-way M. Bison quotation, Jon does everything he can to derail Bullet Points and fails, Mark does everything he can to derail Bullet Points and succeeds, more, etc, the glory of Hammer + "Neon" Deion Sanders, and STILL MORE! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so we can throw those stars with our ninja-like skills! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com

This week we're taking a moment to discuss having your childhood ripped from your hands, folded into a paper airplane, and thrown into a fire made of snakes. That's right, it's time for the WORST VIDEO GAME MOVIES OF ALL TIME! Next week we're talking STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE, so we thought we'd cover the Worst of the Rest when it comes to video game movies. We covered absolutely everything: Jill Sandwiches, best fast food milkshakes, FMV games starring Jeff Goldblum and Rolaids, the Deceipt of Fassbender, so much more, and etc! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, so we can use them to conjure legions of the undead! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodycountsandbeer@gmail.com Let us know what you liked, what you hated, what gave you the rockin' pneumonia and/or the boogie woogie flu, vaccinations for novelty song

What happens when one of the biggest filmmakers ever remakes a French goof 'em up with the star of Pumping Iron? Yes, we're finally discussing TRUE LIES, the 1994 James Cameron action comedy that gave us the one tolerable Tom Arnold performance of the 90s! Joining us in the "studio" this week is special guest Chris Bashen (of the Nerd Outcast Podcast and web series The Studio fame!) and we pull out all the stops making him feel welcome. We also spend some time talking about True Lies! We got a little bit of everything this time around: Jon invents a Turing Test inspired by Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey, Patrick somehow manages to slip in yet another Heaven's Gate reference, Chris explains international space property tax law, we investigate the origins of Bazooka Joe, and we release our sequel to Seal's "Kiss From A Rose." PLUS: the return of Paul Giamatti, who explains how movies are made! If you want to hear more from Chris, check out the Nerd Outcast Podcast here: https://nerdoutcast.podbean.com

This week, we're joined by special guest Chris Bashen of The Nerd Outcast Podcast to discuss the seedy underbelly of our FAVORITE MOVIE SPIES! Surprisingly enough, nobody chose Robert Redford OR Brad Pitt from Spy Game. What kind of world are we living in!? Listen as we cover all the pertinent espionage bases, while somehow skipping over most of the pertinent espionage bases! We speculate on Elton John's role in The Kingsman sequel, Jon chooses a spy from a movie he dislikes, we once again invoke the pleasure and pain of the Cenobites, Patrick and Chris make a date to watch The Kingsman, Mark nails his impression of Halle Berry in Monster's Ball, and we talk about Kingsman so much it's a surprise NONE OF US CHOSE ANY OF THE SPIES FROM IT AS OUR FAVORITE SPIES. Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review, as they are now our primary food source. Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Face

What happens when you pit a barely coherent Matthew McConnaughey against a bored Christian Bale? Well, if it's directed by Rob Bowman, you get the 2002 dragonpalooza REIGN OF FIRE! Yes, Reign of Fire, the movie equivalent of a pot o' chili: it's better the second time you watch it! Join us as we discuss any and all things related and unrelated to Reign of Fire: Matthew McConaughey - King of the Pretty Lawyers, Roblo the Rob Lowe Robot Who is also a Lobot, a surprise lesson in tauntaun anatomy, the great Reign of Fire/Prego tomato sauce ad campaign we never got, Mark's weird fetish, Jon's recipe for the Taco Bell/Little Caesars Sammich, and the debut of the Martin Scorcese Bit! Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review so when we tell people we have a podcast, they actually believe us! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodyco

For this week's very special minisode, we're taking a moment to savor some of the smaller things in life. So buckle up, strap in, and prepare yourself as we discuss our FAVORITE GIANT CINEMATIC MONSTERS! ROAR! Mark takes "full transparency" way too far. GNASH! Jon makes the rookie mistake of confusing Mon Mothma for Mothra. BREATH RAY! Patrick gets excited about all the Tremors films he's missed. STOMP! Jon makes the veteran mistake of confusing King Kong for Godzilla. ETC! Patrick gets excited about the upcoming Rampage film and we try to remember the names of the monsters within to no avail. Please subscribe via iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher, Google Play or pretty much anywhere fine podcasts are purveyed. Leave us a rating and review so we can lull ourselves into a false sense of security! Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/BodyCountCast Like us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/bodycountsandbeer/ Email us: bodycountsandbeer@gmail.com Tell us what you liked, what you hated, what needed to be louder, what n