Robot Monk Xian'er

我真诚待人，人不真诚待我，该如何？我以善意待人，人以恶意待我，又该如何？一味心善，被踩死是活该吗？I am sincere to others, what if others are not sincere to me? And Itreat others with kindness, what if others treat me with malice? Stubbornlysticking to kindness is doomed to being bullied?          善良绝不等于软弱可欺，恰恰相反，善良是一种力量，看见光明、战胜阴暗、唤醒美好的力量，当想放弃善良时，正说明自己内心的软弱无力。人生来就应该善良，失去了善良的心，即使得到了一时的成功，又有何快乐可言呢？更何况，善业必感善果，恶业必感恶果，不可急功近利，只看一时一事。Kindness is by no means equal to being weak and easily bullied, butinstead a kind of power to see the light, to conquer the dark and to awaken thegood. It’s just when you want to give up kindness that shows your innerweakness. Everybody should have been born to be kind. Without a kind heart, whowould have been happy even if achieving a temporary success? More importantly,good deeds lead to good results, and evil ones bad consequences. Never justlook at one thing at a time and seek quick success and instant gain for now.社会上的现实通常是人善被人欺马善被人骑，我即使有向善之心，但却屡屡因此吃亏挫败，当做何解？Usually, good people are apt to b

老师好，我总是很担心“人善被人欺”。Greetings,Master. I am always worried that “nice guys areprone to be bullied.”      怎么会这么想呢？Why doyou think so?我发善心去帮助别人，却被骗了。做一个好人这么难，我还要坚持善良吗？I wascheated when I aroused my kindness to help others. It is so hard to be a goodperson, should I insist on being kind?     许多人在行善的过程中遇到了挫折、不理解甚至来自“受助者”的伤害后，就会觉得善良的人容易受伤害，这是因为不懂得为什么要善良，对付出总有期待，一旦期待不能达成，就觉得委屈、困惑、不公……其实，若认为只要是做善事就会事事顺利，那就太天真了。恰恰是要在一切情况下坚持为善，才是菩萨发心，才懂得行善是自己的事。Afterencountering setbacks, misunderstandings or even injury from the “recipients”in the process of doing good, many feel that kind people are easily hurt. Thisis because they do not know why to be kind, but always expect something inreturn. Once their expectations cannot be fulfilled, they will feel wronged,confused and unfair ... actually, it is naive to think that everything will gowell simply by doing good. It is the persistence of  doing good under all circumstances that arousesthe mind of Bodhisattva and manifests the princip

Fix the mindWhen we focus our attention on the outsideworld, we forget to “fix the mind”, which is the core of cultivation.When judging others as wrong, we must tryto understand their true intentions instead of being caught by formalities;when accepting others as good, to observe their action is enough, we do notneed to dig their intentions.” This is the key to self-cultivation, also theprerequisite of helping others. Many people do it the other way around. Seeingothers’ faults, they keep on criticizing and repelling them, with no patiencefor explanations nor intention to understand them. Seeing others’ doing gooddeeds, they tend to suspect their motivation and find fault with theirattitudes.What we need, in dealing with people andhandling things, is to choose the focus of our thinking process instead ofsheer analysis of the outside environment. The purpose is to fix our mind, tokeep it wholesome, pure and rid of afflictions.修自己的心当我们把重点放在外在的境上时，就忘记了“修自己的心”这个根本。“论人之非，当原其心，不可徒泥于迹；取人之善，当据其迹，不必深究其心。”这是自我修养的关键，也是帮

A troubled heartWe experience pain because we rely on the external to bring ushappiness. When the heart is troubled, peace only comes within. So, changingour perception is the first step. How we were brought up and educated,ourrelatives’ and friends’ attitude towards life, etc. all indirectly influencedour perception, and shaped how we see life—possessing brings happiness, whilelacking results in pain. The real cause for our feelings is this perception, notthe external. Believing that we cannot bear losing something is what fills ourhearts with immense pain of loss and suffering. Usually, people do not see thiscausality, so they give their all to go after the external, which in fact, isimpermanent and dependent on conditions. Thus, life is full of sufferings ofbeing apart from loved onesand not getting what one wants.心结苦是因为我们把快乐寄托在不可靠的外境上。心结，从心而解，从改变自己的知见开始。从小到大所受的教育、身边亲友的生活态度，一切都潜移默化地影响了自己头脑中的观念，构成了自己对人生的认知：有什么就会快乐，没有什么就会很苦。真正影响我们苦乐的并不是外在的什么，而是这种认识。认识上觉得“缺了它不行”，内心就真的产生巨大的缺失和痛苦。世人看不透这层关系，就拼命向外在去求，而外在是无常的、缘起的，

Loving one’s parentsFilial piety lies insincerity instead of materials. To support and wait upon our parents, the bestway is to do it appropriately rather than over-abundantly or extravagantly. Itis great harm to our parents to celebrate their birthdays by killing numerousanimals for feasts. Real love and piety for parents is spiritual concern andmore company to converse with them to relieve them from uneasiness and worries.Chung Yeung Festival,September the ninth on Chinese lunar calendar, is a traditional festival in ourcountry. Chung Yeung, which is also called Double Ninth Festival, meansliterally “double nine”, a positive number in Chinese culture. It is also thelargest number, implying long life and health.ChungYeung Festival was celebrated as early as during the Warring States Times and wasappointed as a folk festival since Tang Dynasty. The festival includes suchcustoms and activities as climbing mountains, going outing, appreciatingchrysanthemums and so on. The ninth day of the ninth lunar month is l

When you can’t get over something, just stop thinking about it How can we find a way out of a maze?It is easy to have a clear picture ifwe can stand in high places.You can't see the forest for thetrees.When we feel lost and couldn't findthe way,it is usually because we are caught inthe situation,and trapped by our own interests,feelings,gains and losses, and emotions.Find the root cause of the sufferingand address it.Such is what we should put effortinto,not simply letting ourselves drown intrivial emotions.Oftentimes, it is the unsolved problemdeeply hidden in our heart thatexhausts us,not something external.Most of our inner strengthis wasted on all types of delusion andclinging.But how can we see the real problemand our true selves?Take a step back from thecomplications and distress,be an outsider for a while,let the mind rest,and then, observe it.If you can’t get over something,just stop thinking about it.Because we cannot escape a spider webcalled “clinging”,in which our thoughts are trapped.Only by maki

我在和别人一起做事时，总是特别在意别人对我的看法，请问这是一种怎样的烦恼？应该怎样去对治它？ When I work with others, Ialways care about what others think of me. Could you tell me what affliction itis and how to cope with it?          这是一种微细但深重的名利心，一旦陷入名利心的沼泽，就会被烦恼绑架，不得自在，痛苦远远大于快乐。其实，虚妄的名誉如同过眼云烟，何必去攀求执著？无论是赞叹还是毁谤，都是外在的东西，赞叹不能增长我们的功德，毁谤不能增加我们的罪业，又何必患得患失呢？It is a subtle but deep-rooted obsession with fame and wealth. Oncetrapped in the swamp of fame and wealth, we will be kidnapped by afflictions,feeling uncomfortable. such a pain is far greater than happiness. In fact,delusive fame is as fleeting as clouds. Why bother to get attached to it? Bothpraise and slander are external. Since praise does not increase our merits andslander also cannot add to our unwholesome deeds, why to be swayed byconsiderations of gains and losses?众：感谢老师指导！Audiences: Thank you Master for your advice!     愿大家早日放下烦恼！May everyone let go of your afflictions as soon as possible!

问：老师，一个人总是很在意他人的看法如何是好，明知不必在乎，可是遇事依旧很在意他人眼中的自己，Master, what can I do if I always care too much about others’ opinion? I know there is no need to worry but I’m still concerned with what others think of me.而且总是担心别人对自己有误解，害怕自己的做法伤害他人，回复消息时都要小心翼翼，再三斟酌，这样好心累啊，请老师开导。And I’m always afraid ofbeing misunderstood and fear that what I do may hurt others. So I have to becautious and deliberate before responding to a message. I feel my heart sotired. Could you please give me some advice?     答：如果一个人想要痛苦的过一辈子，那么心向外求是个不错的选择。其实，在意他人的眼光，出发点是为了保护自己，但“向外求肯定”的心态却让这个良好的愿望变成了相反的结果，自己越来越脆弱、胆小、自卑。“众生欲除苦，奈何苦更增”，原因就是不认识真正的苦乐根源。佛法中说，痛苦来自于我执、烦恼、恶业，快乐来自于无我、智慧、善业。If you want to suffer a lifetime, seeking outward is a good choice.In fact, the starting point of caring too much about others’ opinion is to protect oneself, but the mindset of “looking outsidefor affirmation” turns the good intention into the opposite result, makingoneself more vulnerable, timid and self-abased, just as a verse goes, “Sentientbeings want to

问：我总是害怕失败，害怕别人笑话我，于是什么都不敢做。我总是想把事情做到十全十美，虽然我也知道世上无完事，但总会这么想。我从小生活在一个没有人肯定我的家庭中，我还有个妹妹，小时候，她经常不及格，而我总是考班级前几名。可是，我的爸爸总是会鼓励妹妹，夸赞她。而对我，总是大骂，怪我没考满分。I am always soafraid of failure and ridicule from others that I dare not do anything. Ialways want to make things perfect. Even though I know that there is no perfectthing in the world, I can’t help thinking that way. I grew up in a family wherenobody appreciated me. I have a little sister. She often failed her exams as achild while I was always at the top of the class. However, my father alwaysencouraged and praised her, but tended to scold and blame me for not gettingfull marks.答：从小内心欠缺爱和鼓励，会有两个方向。一是意识到人永远无法依靠别人，从而更加自信、坚强；二是被打败，一生都活他人的眼光中，敏感、胆小，郁郁不乐。前者是向内求，后者是向外求，想要选择哪一个，自己应该很清楚的。其实，归罪于家人也是一种向外求的表现。There are two directions for those who have been lack of love andencouragement since their childhood: for one thing, to realize that there isnobody else to rely on, and thus become more confident and stronger; foranother, to be defeated and live a lifetime in others’ eyes,

2、问：为何我每做一件事或说了什么话，都有人拿来做文章或背后议论，总怕被人指指点点，特别焦虑！Why do I get picked on or gossiped about behind my back every time Ido or say something? I’m constantlyafraid of what others think about me, feeling especially anxious.          答：大家关注自己，说明自己有值得关注之处，要以此为策励，更加努力向上，散发更多正能量。“仰不愧于天，俯不怍于人”，心安、自得、快乐。When people pay attention to yourself, you have something to deservetheir attention. Try to take it as an inspiration, and work harder to transmitmore positive energy, just as an ancient sage said, “Have a clear conscienceover heaven while looking up, and have nothing to be ashamed of whileoverlooking”, which manifests a peace of mind, contentment, and happiness. 3问：平时做事太在意他人的看法，总觉得自己不够好，不能做真正的自己。怎样找回自己，增加自信呢！I usually care too much about the opinions of others. And Iconstantly think that I am not good enough to stay true to myself. How can Ifind myself and enhance my self-confidence?  答：要活在自己的愿力中、智者的指教中，而不是他人的眼光中。自己不够好，是以什么为标准？哪些地方不足？该怎样改善？这样想才有意义，而不是一个畏缩、自卑的心情，莫名其妙的担忧

人生活在这个社会中，总会与人打交道，很多人活在他人的眼光中，痛苦不堪。As youknow, people living in this society always have to deal with each other. Butmany living in others’ eyes gave way to helpless misery.让智慧来帮助我们战胜这些烦恼吧。Let thewisdom help us out of these afflictions.1、问：今年大龄未婚，前不久工作也没了，越来越自卑自闭，不愿外出也不愿与朋友联系，害怕别人嘲笑瞧不起，心态很不好。请老师指导。 I amabove the average age for marriage but still single. And I lost my jobrecently, feeling more inferior and depressed. I don’t want to go out or keepin touch with my friends, afraid of being laughed laugh at or looked down upon.I've been in a very bad state of mind. Master, please give me some advice.    答：人生的路是要自己走的，不是活给别人看的。因为害怕他人的眼光而不能面对自己人生的困难，是一件很傻的事，别人不会为你的人生负责。The roadof life is to walk by yourself, not to live in others’ eyes. It would be quitefoolish to fail in facing the difficulties in one’s own life for fear ofothers’ opinion. In fact, no one but yourself is responsible for your own life.

Envy, jealousy, hatred Delusion breeds jealousy. To take others’gain as one’s own loss, to separate, and to contrast, all these lead todepression and hatred. While in fact, one doesn’t have to lose anything even ifothers may gain. Everyone lives his separate life. There is absolutely no needto compare, nor is it possible. Unfortunately, one imagines a concept andattaches to it. Thus, one’s mind is churned upside down.Due to our obsession with an ego, it ishard for us to be honestly happy for others. Our narrow-mindedness separates usfrom those around us, drowning us in the games of win and loss, victory anddefeat which are outward, temporal, unreal.Only through aiming high and thinking bigcan we surpass confinements to our mind and see through the illusionarycomparisons made against others.羡慕嫉妒恨 嫉妒心建立在妄想的基础上，将他人之得当做自己之失，在内心妄加分别、比较，而产生失落与嗔心。其实，别人拥有了，自己并没有失去什么；每个人都有各自的人生，根本不需要比较，也无法比较，而自己却在心中假设一个概念并去执着，故而产生高下不平之心。难以真诚随喜他人的成就，是因为对自我的执着让我们的内心狭小而封闭，把自己与身边的人事物对立起来，沉溺于外在的、暂时的、不真实的输与赢、胜与败之中。唯有建立起更远大的目标，放宽心胸

A soft and open heartTo stick to our own ideas does notnecessarily mean to shun others’ opinions. If we are down because of our thoughtsnot being accepted by others, what we really have in mind is only our feelings.We are unable to see the good intention of others not to say to understand andthank them.At that point, our heart is closed and weare stubborn. This is what is meant by obsession. We don’t need to take other’sopinion all the time. However, we do need a soft and open heart. We must becapable of understanding and accepting others.Everyone has his angle. What is lacking isto think in others’ shoes and to find out the reasons behind all differences,instead of labeling others as black or white. If we can follow this advice, wemay avoid of being annoyed by others, even if in the end we still believe ourideas may work better.In our everyday life, things may be done indifferent ways. All roads lead to Rome. The problem is that we just can’t letgo of our own ideas.柔软而开放的心 坚持自己的意见，不一定要排斥他人的善意。当我们因为自己的想法

A positive and happy mindAdjustments should be made when work piles up, but most importantly,we should adjust our mindset of resentment. Our mind is like food, essential tothe body. A positive and happy mind can be a source of energy, while a negativeand resentful mind will poison us like food that has gone bad. Every occupationhas its significance and worth. Such is the main purpose of our work. Thingslike getting plenty of rest or earning a fair amount of money only come second. Many people nowadays are getting less and less happy by assessing work throughthe criteria of the latter, and forgetting what’s most important. Those wholove what they do and gain a sense of accomplishment from work, all put theformer first. The significance and worth of our work is closely linked withthat of our life. The value of our lives is all created through our work. Seeingwork as an enemy is in fact negating and lowering the value of our lives, whichwill take away one’s enjoyment

Wishingfor nothingTo wish for nothing is still a wish.It is a wish for liberated ease when alltightly entangled knots are cut off. Therefore, literally, it is not wishing fornothing. There still exists a wish, but fordifferent things. To desire for something does not mean goingupward.The desire for fame and vanity is exactlywhere one starts to degenerate. 无求无欲“无欲无求”者，所求的是放下羁绊的自在与洒脱，实际上并非完全无所求，只是所求的对象不同罢了；反过来说，“有欲有求”也不代表就是上进，对名利虚荣的追求，恰恰是一个人堕落的开始。

Who am I? The “self” is a concept created from ourdream-thinking, which means something permanent, autonomous and dominant. Wealways believe that there is an eternal, essential and absolute “self” havingcontrol over life. But Dharma teaches us, in reality,“non-self” isthe truth.“Non-self” does not mean the absence of “self”, but rather thenonexistence of a permanent one. The human body, emotions, thoughts, behaviorsand mind are constantly changing. Hence, there is no such “self” independent ofany kind of cause or condition, existing on its own.Nothing is excluded from forever changing. Everythingis a result of causes and conditions coming together, having no “own-being” ordominance. Understanding “non-self” means seeing through the illusions of theworld and letting go of all attachments to the external. Then, we will be ableto treat all beings, including ourselves, with more wisdom and compassion. 我是谁？  “我”，是世间人颠倒妄想中定义的一个概念，它包含的涵义是：恒常、独立、主宰，世人总认为有一个独立的、不变的、永远存在的“我”在支配着生命现象，而佛法告诉我们，事实的真相是“无我”。无我，不是没有这个我，而

Right and WrongMore often than not, when disputing on"rights and wrongs", we actually have been far removed from thethings in themselves, and fallen into a confused fighting of inner afflictions.As everyone has their own perspectives, the "fact" you see is notnecessarily the same as that your counterpart sees. If either side insist onthe counterpart accepting his own opinion, a dispute will arise. This is theroot of causing conflicts.  What reallymakes us happy is not in "a statement" or "a lot of materialguarantee", which is merely an inherent thought of attachment. Conversely,all sufferings derive from the inner attachment, just as a verse says,"All sufferings arise from greed for one's own happiness."  We have no dispute with others in that weknow fame and fortune are not perpetuate with a lot of negative effects.Sometimes we do seek them but stop half-way for the lack of strength in holdingon, especially after seeing those we consider inferior ge

I can figure this outTo fear andworry about imaginary difficulties is nothing but your own illusions. Even ifnothing occurs, you might already be flooded by waves of pessimistic illusions.Those who’velost their mindfulness tend to think that “what if I cannot do it?” However,those with mindfulness believe that “I can try to figure this out.”For thosewithin your reach, just make efforts for it. For those beyond your capacity,you can sow the right seeds in the first place.Whatever theexternal circumstances, it is necessary to dwell your mind in the presentmoment rather than struggle with the past or fret over the future.Living in the present moment is to alive both inone’s body and mind, with no illusions nor worries or fear. In such a state,the mind does not wander about but concentrates and dwells at ease in thecurrent moment. With such a mind, one is aware of what he is doing right nowand what it has to do with his past and future.In contrast, the idea of Carpe Diem merely steals“living in the present moment

Generate theinner lightTounderstand all phenomena is to have knowledge; to know the principles behind thephenomena is to have wisdom. With both knowledge and wisdom, one can make sounddecisions when caught in difficult situations. Prajna is theinsight into emptiness. To learn the law of non-self and emptiness, one has to observeprecepts, to practice samadhi, and to reach prajna slowly. The Buddha practicesboth compassion and wisdom. He is compassionate but does not suffer as ordinarybeings do. His compassion, governed by the wisdom of prajna, is transparent andbright, without a trace of attachment or obsession, “like a lotus flower not weigheddown by water, like the sun and moon hang in the sky but not struck.”The Buddhasays, all beings have the inherent wisdom as the tathagata does. However, dueto delusion and obsession, they do not realize it. Human beings have both theseeds of virtue and the seeds of evil in their mind. They have both the Buddhanature and ignorance from beginningless time. For one aspect t

Thedouble-headed birdThere isa Buddhist story about a double-headed bird. The two heads compete against eachother for fruit. One head deliberately gives the poisonous fruit to the other, andboth heads die.  In fact,the same is true of a society. Everyone coexists with others. To harm others isto harm oneself. To be the best is to compete with oneself, not with others.  If you harborthe notion of competition anywhere you go and all the time, then you won’t haveany friends. People around you are all but opponents, pressing against you fromthe opposite side.  Enlarge yourheart a little bit to hold your own success as well as others’ achievements.Multitudes of people live on the earth, coexisting and interconnected. “I” amnot alone. 双头鸟佛教中有一个双头鸟的故事，两个头彼此争夺果实，一个头故意把毒果给另一个头吃，结果两个头都死了。其实一个社会也是如此，人人都是相依共存的，伤害别人就是伤害自己。做到最好，是要自己跟自己比，不是跟别人比。如果随时随地心存竞争之念，周围的人就都成为了对手、对立面，就没有朋友了。把心放大一点，不仅装得下自己的成功，也能装得下别人的成绩。世上有许许多多的人，大家是共处的，彼此相连的，不是只有“我”存在。