Life Over Coffee With Rick Thomas

There are times when we can deceive ourselves into believing we are doing good when we’re not. The deceptions of sin are subtle. Having someone speak into the things we cannot see is vital, which is what I did with Biff and Mable. This mindmap (below) unravels their tangled marriage by showing how and why he did not love his wife well while choosing to love others more. He had twisted ruling motives of the heart. No surprise; I have them, too. But it was worse. He used the Bible to support his actions. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/my-husband-does-not-protect-me-a-mind-map-case-study/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

There are times when you have to do hard things for those whom you love. You do the difficult things because—in some situations—it’s the best way to honor someone. Some caring friends have a hard time applying this truth to those they love. Usually, they are afraid not to acquiesce to the demands because of the gaslighting and manipulations. They must come to terms with this complicated truth: honoring others does not mean letting them run all over you. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/honoring-someone-does-not-mean-to-give-them-everything-they-want/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

What do you want to be when you grow up? It’s not just a question for the high school graduate. I did not figure out what I wanted to be after growing up until I was thirty-eight years old. Some of us are a bit slower than the average bear. If you’re uncertain about your niche in life, I have some valuable advice for you. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/what-do-you-want-to-be-when-you-grow-up-heres-some-advice/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – Guilt and conviction are two of many kindnesses from the Lord. We would not know there was something wrong with us if the Spirit did not let us know. But because we live in a post-Genesis three world, there is confusion about guilt and conviction. This webinar addresses the confusion while bringing practical insight into how to respond to true conviction, the effects of feelings not from God, and how to live in the freedom of the Lord’s forgiveness. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-388-webinar-victory-over-true-guilt-defeating-a-false-sense-of-guilt/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Show Main Idea: Everyone is different because of our unique and diverse shaping influences. Understanding what motivates an individual is essential to do competent soul care. This webinar is an in-depth exploration of our human motivations and shaping influences with practical applications that will help you understand those you care about the most. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-387-webinar-human-motivations-and-shaping-influences/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – "In our modern world of progression and electronic communication, social media has become the primary way information is distributed and people connect. It is not common to find someone without social media, from personal to professional relationships, yet here I am." In this episode, Rick interviews Tristen Thomas as she shares six reasons to reduce or give up social media. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-386-young-adult-shares-six-reasons-to-give-up-social-media/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Thinking about our past can be a good thing. There is a lot made of a person’s past in the counseling world. Our history is important because God was in our past. (cf. Jeremiah 1:5; Ephesians 1:3-11). The Lord did not show up in our lives at the point of salvation. Omniscient and omnipresent, God has always been aware of and involved in our lives. He knows more about our past, present, and future than we do. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/eight-ways-to-think-about-your-past-those-things-that-happened-to-you/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

One of the most unintended consequences of the biblical counseling movement is that counseling is for a select number of Christians. Though God has blessed the biblical counseling movement over the past several decades, one of the problems with the unprecedented growth of biblical counseling is that we forgot to tell the church that counseling is for everyone, not just a few (Romans 15:14). God’s call on your life is to go and make disciples, a synonym for counseling. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/any-christian-can-counsel-are-you-counseling/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

We express satisfaction about something based on how much we value it. The formula is “value creates satisfaction.” If we don’t value it, we won’t find satisfaction with it. For example, if you have received a long-anticipated or cherished gift, you responded with joy because it was something that you valued. For the believer, when you appreciate God more than anything else, you will experience the greatest joy possible. You will be forever happy because Christ is eternally valuable. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/a-post-christmas-follow-up-are-you-happy/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Authentic and mature Christianity is always on the mind of any discipler because it is crucial to discern such things with those who receive your care. As much as you can subjectively understand, the actual spiritual condition of a person is essential to know. Here are a few practical ways to help you think correctly about those you love. As you work through this content, give proper consideration to yourself to see how well you’re maturing in Christ, too. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/the-number-one-sign-of-authentic-christianity/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Supporter Question: As a full-time elder and pastor for 27 years, I have seen and walked with people through many forms of offenses and relational conflict. Your articles are helpful and needed in the church today. In the following scenario, I wonder if you could address forgiveness and the need to walk free from resentment and bitterness. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/when-unforgiveness-lingers-resentment-and-bitterness-enter/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Show Main Idea: Some people are hard to be attracted to, and when I find myself thinking like this, I know I have lost my divine perspective, and my discipling of them is on the verge of being ineffective. Thus, I must recalibrate my heart to God's perspective and the gospel before I can help them change. In this practical webinar, Rick breaks down into a granular level the essential things you need to know before you can help others change. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-385-webinar-essential-things-before-helping-someone-change/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Show Main Idea: When one spouse is consistently critical and the other is insecure, the relationship polarizes and will not correct itself without radical changes. The problem is the insecure spouse wants the good, proper, and biblical desires of love, respect, and acceptance, but the critical spouse is sinning, choosing not to provide them. This vital webinar speaks to the underlying root problems with this type of relational conundrum, practical steps to change, and the ultimate solution. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-384-webinar-the-critical-spouse-the-insecure-spouse/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

The gospel is more than a birth-to-death story. The life and death of Christ are part of an incredible golden chain that reaches from eternity past to eternity future. The best news of all is we can enjoy the full benefits of the gospel by faith—no works, just trust. Christ has done all the work for us. Our job is to apply and benefit from all aspects of the gospel. The key question is whether we are fully understanding and applying the full measure of the gospel to our lives. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/the-gospel-is-more-than-a-birth-to-death-story/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

The interplay between the Christian and secular worlds is relevant for all believers. Knowing “what is truth” is always a struggle for anyone, but especially when those who own the airwaves breathe out one-sided stories predominantly. This past week, I benefited from a few smaller voices that shared contrary messages to the standard groupthink. These folks talked about some of the most critical events in today’s culture. I’m not suggesting they own the truth; these resources merely offer alternate opinions. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-383-six-resources-to-help-you-think-about-our-cultural-crisis/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Show Main Idea: A child’s earliest understanding of God the Father comes from their earthly fathers. The psychological term in early child development is mutual exclusivity, a child assigning one label to describe all items within the category. The culture understands the concept but they don’t have the best answers. In this webinar, Rick talks about how many children initially map their experience with their fathers over how they think about God the Father. He speaks to the problem while providing practical training for us to parent well. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-382-webinar-parenting-the-important-role-of-fathers/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

The Christmas season is a double blessing for the believer. We get to celebrate the birth of Christ, a pivotal point of the gospel narrative. And we can enjoy the cultural Christmas, too. It’s okay to engage the things of this world if your heart does not crave those things in a sinful way (James 1:14-15). What are the benefits of penetrating the culture to engage those who do not know Christ while enjoying the season? Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/enjoying-the-cultural-and-the-christian-christmas/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Rick, what are your thoughts on Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy as far as what you tell your kids? Do you say these characters are real or not? Is this harmless fun, or is there a problem with deception going on here? The culture continues to creep into our homes and lives. I'm not sure how to walk them through our seasonal intruder with younger children, especially when their friends are adamant about Santa being an actual person. – Supporting Member Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/the-santa-claus-question-what-do-i-tell-my-children/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

Shows Main Idea – This episode review of The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill speaks to the aftermath of Mark Driscoll’s resignation from the church. Mike Cosper from Christianity Today interviews an eclectic group of folks who talk about the heartbreak, turmoil, fear, as well as the practical matters of finding new churches, jobs, and relationships. Meanwhile, Mark popped back up in Arizona; he rebranded and relaunched himself as though nothing happened. In this review, I will speak to five essential takeaways for all of us to learn. Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-381-response-to-the-rise-and-fall-of-mars-hill-episode-14/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/

On Christmas day, people all over the world exchange presents. It is a cultural event full of fun memories. I do like many aspects of the cultural Christmas. Sadly, Christmas loses its meaning because of its secularization. For most people, Christmas is about the economy, presents, or family conflict. We lose the idea of a generous gospel in most of the world, which is why I want to talk about a theology of gift-giving. Perhaps a refresher on sacrifice will recalibrate our minds to the primary reason for the season. Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/a-theology-of-gift-giving/ Will you help us so we can continue to provide free content to the world? You can become a supporting member here rickthomas.net/recurring-membership/ Or you can make a one-time or recurring donation(s) here https://rickthomas.net/donations/